Emily

It’s been a minute since I hopped on here and just rambled.

I’ve been with my boyfriend and literal love of my life for almost 2 years now, there is no question that I want to spend the rest of my life with him. I never wanted to get married until I met him. The very second time we ever hung out, I looked at him for no reason in my head and knew I was going to marry him, I was in love with him I just didn’t say it.

My parents are still married, but there marriage is far from perfect and loving. They could fight about whether the sky is blue. It’s like walking on eggshells at my house, on bad days I live with headphones in my ears music full blast. I never wanted that, I never wanted what they had, as sad as it was to admit, I know and still know they are waiting for my sister to finish up college so they can divorce. Neither of them are happy.

When I met my current boyfriend, that changed. His family was so big, warm and welcoming. He had a mom and a step dad who love each other so much. I saw that, they welcomed me in when my dad was thrown out and I wanted to be anywhere but home, even though at that time we had only been dating a month and a half.

If I’m being honest for most of my life my parents killed the idea of marriage. I thought all marriages turn out to be like there’s. I thought this because my mom always said you have no idea what goes on in a marriage and that after awhile it’s just like having a roommate. I thought if I got married I was bound to hate my partner eventually, I was bound to have daily fights, and bound to have my kids resent me. I never saw my parents sit down and talk and I never saw them actually fix things. Someone always held the fight over the others head.

When I met my boyfriend I made it my goal to never go to bed angry, we will always fix it, there is no sleeping in things and dragging it out. We did that. We do that. I actually knew what it was like to love someone so hard and fearlessly, I knew what it was like to want to marry someone. I’ve made it my mission do nothing my parents do, I never want my kids to have to pick sides in a fight, I never want them to hear what I’ve heard or seen what I’ve seen.

I want to start by saying I love my family very much and respect the fact our views are different and they most likely always will be different.

I was very opinionated at a very young age. I knew exactly what I wanted and how to say it. I grew up and matured pretty quickly and pretty young, the way I grew up I basically had to in a way. Something about the news always fascinated me and I would often watch it when nothing else was on tv. So I knew what I was saying. I was 7(I think??) when Obama was elected. I remember asking the front desk lady at my doctors office who she was voting for and telling her if I could vote, it would be for Obama.

My parents never told me who they voted for in that election but they were pretty open about who the voted for to be the 45th president, Donald Trump. When I say my whole family supports Trump I mean it. All of my grandparents and aunts(except for one) and even my 13 year old sister. My grandma always tries to prove me wrong in any political argument and tries to change my views. We can’t have one political conversation without her trying to tell me Trump is a good man and acts maturely.

My parents on the other hand have never tried to change my views. They know where I stand. We have had political conversations but never has my parents ever told me my opinion was “wrong” or I should want to become I republican because now I’m working and taxes get taken out of my check every two weeks. They have always just informed me on how they feel and the reasons behind their arguments. Which the majority of them, I can see where they are coming from.