sotey truther

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His breaths come in deep shudders, chest rising and falling as he gasps for air. Wukula had really gotten him this time. So’lek’s ribs ached, and all he could do was stare up at the dark sky above him. Raindrops fall from the curling depths of the clouds, splattering lightly against his face and arms. But So’lek doesn’t feel it. All he feels is pain–and misery. 

Is Tamtey alright? He had left her so quickly, eager to get rid of the threat to his new family. Now he feels a twinge of regret. What if leaving her had damned her? Is she awake? Breathing? She had been heavily injured, covered in open wounds and dried blood that made So’lek hold back gags. It had been obvious she had been through a lot while captured, but So’lek had tried to clear his mind of it. He had carried her, Tamtey’s limp body light in his hands and her head lolling against his shoulder. Now he hopes that the others have found her, taken her somewhere safe. To heal her and help her. He expects nothing for himself in this moment, darkness seeping into his vision. In this moment, he feels only sorrow, aching to see Tamtey again before he closes his eyes. But he is losing the battle–eyes are growing heavier, and the world spins above him. Darkness seeps in, starting from the corner of his vision until it finally crowds to cover his pupils. For a second, he knows only darkness, submerged in a world of black. He fights for just a moment longer, desperate. But he fails, and the last thing he thinks about before he succumbs to the abyss is the luminosity of Tamtey’s eyes. 

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The first thing he sees is the flickering of lantern fire splashing against grey sheets of smooth rock. His eyes barely open, eyelids flitting to cover his yellow eyes as they meet harsh light for the first time. So’lek takes in a quick breath, urging his eyes to open fully. He squints, forcing his pupils to focus on his surroundings. He comes back to himself slowly, taking in the current state of his long body. He feels the ache in his chest, the burning of lacerations in the process of healing strewn across his arms and legs. His back is sore where it is propped up against upholstered cushions stuffed full of zakru hair, but even with the softness beneath him, he is positive that he is covered in a smattering of bruises from the way even the slightest shift of the fabric on skin makes him grit his teeth. He takes one more sweep of the room from where he lies on the ground, finding nothing but the familiar walls of his solitude. He is dazed, comforted to know he is home–he snuggles in deeper into the cushion despite his pain, tongue brushing over his fangs beneath his lips. He allows himself to rest, eyes closing–then the reality of his situation settles in. 

His eyes fly up, heart beginning to pound as he struggles to sit up. The bandages across his skin pull at the scabbing wounds as his muscles strain, but he does not stop. He manages to sit upright, breaths coming in shallow and rapid. He groans, clenching his abdomen, but still tries to push off the ground. 

Where is Tamtey? 

For a moment, he is delirious, pawing at the hard ground beneath him for any sense of support. He fails miserably. He throws out cusses, swearing into the air around him and growling in frustration–he is seconds away from screaming out when bodies begin to surround him, voices intelligible as they urgently encourage him to lie back down. So’lek refuses, jerking back when hands push against his shoulders–he hisses loudly, teeth bared and eyes focusing on the people in front of him. The soft eyes of the Aranahe tsahik find his, naked brows burrowed in concern. To her left is Rasi, wrinkled hands pulling the younger woman when she sees So’lek’s distress. 

“So’lek, please calm down,” scolds Etuwa, desperate to make the older man listen. So’lek’s eyes flicker between the two women, tail slashing in wide arcs behind him. Slowly, he complies, allowing himself to slow his heart and breathing–but he does not lie back down. 

“What happened? Where is Tamtey?” His voice is strained, words breaking between small gasps for air. Definitely broken ribs. He doesn’t dwell on it. Rasi and Etuwa just watch him, still trying to persuade him to lie down. It only angers him more. 

“Stop! Where is Tamtey?” He has never raised his voice at them before; he rarely does at anyone. Even he can hear the anguish in his expression. It is so desperate that he is certain the women hear it; there is nothing to hide it. The love. He doesn’t even attempt to tame it. Let the whole moon know. 

“So’lek, you need to calm yourself. We will tell you everything, but you must rest,’ says Rasi, her wisened voice soothing. So’lek rolls his eyes, impatient. He does not want to rest, he wants–no, needs to know if Tamtey is okay, “I am calm. Please speak.” Etuwa sighs, throwing her hands out in exasperation, “You are still so difficult even after all of these years!” So’lek doesn’t respond, looking up at her, disgruntled and aching. Etuwa drops to her knees in front of him on the floor, Rasi following slower. They share one glance, Rasi nodding for Etuwa to continue. 

“You have been unconscious for days. Only a few, but you are very hurt and dehydrated. You are stubborn even in your sleep; no water would move past your lips.” So’lek huffs, impatient, “I know that I am injured, you do not have to tell me. Just tell me about Tamtey.” Etuwa sends up a quick prayer to Eywa for her to find patience when dealing with this insufferable man, “We found both of you at the remnants of Hometree–well, the Sarentu found you. You were next to Wukula, and Teylan helped get you back. Ri’nela and Rasi found Tamtey just outside of the metal walls.” They were still avoiding telling him about Tamtey’s current state. Something must be terribly wrong, but he doesn’t voice his opinion, fervent to hear what else they have to say. Etuwa takes a deep breath, voice catching in her throat. The young tsahik looks to Rasi for help. 

Oh no.

“Tamtey is sleeping.” That is all the elder gives him. So’lek’s eyes narrow, “And what else?” Rasi sighs, a hand coming out to rest on So’lek’s bandaged arm.

“Are you sure you want to know this, So’lek?” The man flinches back, golden eyes searching Rasi’s own. She must see his misery, giving into his desires as she speaks again, “Tamtey was heavily injured. More than you. The explosion at Hometree surely did not help her wounds,” she pauses, licking her lips, “But that is not the worst of it. They did things to her–the RDA and…the Mangwkan. We cannot ask her since she has not woken up, but it is clear that they have tortured her.” So’lek doesn’t let Rasi get out another word, moving both of his hands behind him to push himself up onto his knees. The two women frantically try to push him back down, but he is having none of it. Even in his weakened state, he is stronger than the two of them. He growls at them lowly, “Let me see her!” His voice is rough, mangled. Rasi and Etuwa finally give in; So’lek knows he is a sorry sight. The two women lift him together, one arm under each of his shoulders. Lifting his arms to rest on theirs hurts terribly, but he doesn’t dare to make a noise, stumbling along. 

They help him up the small ledges to reach the area where his large map hangs on the wall. Just below it lies Tamtey, unconscious. At the sight of her, So’lek’s legs seem to give out, knees buckling to the ground at her side. Rasi and Etuwa let him fall. He sees no one else, not even noticing Ri’nela and Teylan on the other side of Tamtey. His breath is shaky as he inhales, hands hovering over the Sarentu’s supine form, never touching. He takes in Tamtey’s body, wrapped in more bandages and salve than his, the arm on the other side of him attached to a line leading into a bag of fluids. The humans had to intervene then. Her head has a healing gash on it,  a large scab, purple and swollen, where it rests above her right eye. His eyes trail lower to find layers of cloth wrapping around her chest, some spots dark with blood. He swallows as he searches her extremities. There, he sees multiple marks: burns, cuts, and bruises. They are like a new pattern on the light blue of her skin. Only her wrists are wrapped, likely injured from being in metal cuffs. The only thing they had left on her was her loincloth, torn at the edges and filled with holes from licks of fire. He can see everything, and he has never felt so scared. Slowly, So’lek lets one hand fall to the curve of Tamtey’s left cheek, rubbing his thumb over her Sarentu mark in absentminded circles. Feeling her. 

“Has she not awoken?” He sounds wrecked– so far gone for this woman, he cannot even begin to comprehend what he would do if he lost her. 

“No, ma So’lek,” states Ri’nela, voice barely above a whisper. She’s crouched on the other side of Tamtey, staring at him. He sees it from the corner of his eye, but he cannot look away from Tamtey.

“It is bad then?” 

There is silence at his words, and that alone is all the confirmation he needs, “I want to stay here. Next to her. I will rest, but it will be at her side.” He is firm. Final. He is not going to play petty games or argue back and forth, because Tamtey had to be in his line of sight at all times. In case she–when she wakes up. Ri’nela purses her lips, torn, “So’lek, I do not think that is a good–,” he cuts her off, “I do not care what you think. I am not moving.” It was barked. Snappish. He only takes a moment to feel guilty, just because Ri’nela is always so kind. But he can never control himself when it comes to Tamtey. Ri’nela does not even flinch, expecting him to lash out; she has seen the differences in treatment of Tamtey compared to the other Sarentu since the start. She cannot blame him for doing so. So, she nods, “Okay, So’lek. Okay.” Ri’nela stands, motioning for the others to follow her away from the two Na’vi on the ground, making the excuse of grabbing more supplies for So’lek’s reopened wounds. But really, she knows he needs a moment alone. 

Once they are out of sight, So’lek falls to the side from his spot on his knees, crumbling into a fetal position. From here, he can still see the gentle rise and fall of Tamtey’s wrapped chest. Seeing the evidence of her breathing allows him to finally fall into the chasm of sleep once more.

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A few more days pass. So’lek does not leave her side, to the others' chagrin. He flitters around her, unwary of his own injuries, to check her bandages, put salves on her healing bruises and burns, and force water down her throat. The feeling of trepidation has not left his throat since he last woke up. According to the others, Tamtey has been asleep for a week. She has barely roused; the only movement they have seen from her has been beneath her eyelids. She is still there, yet So’lek’s worries only deepen. He hates seeing her like this: weak, sick, and vulnerable. It reminds him of his shortcomings. His failure to protect her. He had let them take her away and allowed them to torture her for days—he had not been fast enough. These thoughts plague his mind as he gently rewraps one of Tamtey’s angular wrists, making sure not to tighten them too much. He did not want her to be in any more pain.

Outside, it is dark, eclipse having long passed, and the others have long since gone to sleep for the night. They had quickly stopped pestering him to leave Tamtey’s side once they saw his determination. 

He ties off the edge of the bandage, tucking in its little tail. He settles back, butt falling into the pit of his knees. 

He lets his chin fall to his chest, eyes blinking closed. Quietly, under his breath,  he mutters a long prayer to Eywa. 

Please, Great Mother, let Tamtey rise from this. She is a warrior. And a leader. She is true of heart and fights not just for her people, but all of The People. She is the most deserving of life and living. She has had so much taken from her. Please do not take her from me. I cannot lose anyone else. 

He finishes, choosing to reflect. He sits in silence, taking in all of the sounds of the night. The crickets of insects, the quiet grumbles of the ikran outside, the small puffs of Tamtey’s breath. 

In and out. In and out. 

It hitches.

His ears flick back, honing in on the pattern of her breathing. It has returned to normal, but then a slight whimper breaks the silence. His eyes fly open, and he rocks forward, hovering over Tamtey. Her face is screwed up, eyes clenching, and lips puckering into a grimace. She is waking up. So’lek’s hands find her cheeks, centering her head as he moves his face over hers. He wanted to see her eyes so badly.

Please.

He waits, holding his breath. Then, slowly, Tamtey’s eyes bat open, long eyelashes brushing against the hollowed bags of her eyes. He feels a lump begin to form in his throat. His eyes meet hers, the vibrant mixture of colors in her irises so wide and encompassing. Slowly, her gaze focuses, finding him. She breathes out a quivering, “So’lek?” He cannot speak; his throat has seemingly sealed shut. He is not even sure if he is awake. He just swallows, nodding at her. She still looks confused, eyebrows furrowing, and one of her arms reaching up, shaking from the effort as she tries to reach him. He meets her halfway, one of his hands leaving her face to grab her fingers, bringing them to rest on her chest. At his touch, she seems to break, “So’lek.” Then tears are welling in her eyes, and she is suddenly sobbing beneath him. He panics, eyes widening, hands back on her cheeks, “Tamtey? Tamtey, it is alright.” She just stares up at him, her eyes filling with more tears as they continue to fall down the azure skin of her face. He cups her neck, letting his thumbs find the curve of her rounded jaw. He swipes his thumbs across her skin where they lie, “Tam tam, ma Tamtey.” He keeps the calloused pads of her fingers where he can feel her heart beat in her throat. 

Tamtey sniffles, sobs beginning to quiet, “Help me up, please.” Her voice is croaky. So’lek jumps into action, finding a nearby cup of water and bringing it to her, tilting her head and neck up enough for her to swallow the liquid. He tries to make her drink more, but she weakly bats his hands away, urging him to help her. And of course, he obliges, moving her to sit up and letting her lean against his side for support. They sit together, Tamtey taking a second to catch her breath from the struggle of moving on her own after so long. His hands don’t leave her body, one arm wrapped around her waist, the other resting in his lap, ready for action.

“I thought I was dead.” Tamtey’s words are soft, barely loud enough to be heard. But, So’lek does. He clenches his jaw, feeling the familiar stretch of scarred skin on his left cheek, “Luckily, you are not.” That earns him a chuckle, followed by a coughing fit that wracks Tamtey’s weakened body. He holds her sturdily, rubbing her back and feeding her water. As he goes to bring the water cup away, Tamtey’s hand wraps around his thickly boned wrist. He looks over to her, meeting her gaze immediately. She takes the cup from him without breaking eye contact, placing it somewhere behind her. He just watches her, waiting. 

“And…I thought I would never see you again.” He does not know what he was expecting her to say, but it definitely was not that. And he definitely is not prepared for the way his eyes begin to burn, “Do not say such things. You knew I would come for you.” He refuses to let the tears fall, but Tamtey sees them forming and frowns, “I knew you would, but the days were starting to blend together, and then th-the fire. They drugged me, and I had no idea what was happening, and I was so tired, ma So’lek.” Her voice is ragged and filled with heartache, only worsening as she continues, “And for a moment I thought I heard your voice, but I could not yell out to you. My lips would not move, and-and my throat was too tight, and I could not tell you that I–,” her voice cracks. So’lek feels his fragile heart cracking alongside it. He coos at her with a click of his tongue, as he would to an ailing animal, “You do not need to say any more, ma Tamtey.” She just shakes her head back in response, rapid enough to send the beads in her hair tinkling as they clack against each other.

“You do not understand, So’lek! I have so much left unsaid, and I thought you would never know it!” He reaches out a large hand to her face, cupping one cheek to bring her more into the present. One of his long fangs snags on his lip as he contemplates his next action, his tail thumping on the ground behind him. Tamtey doesn’t move or say another word, undoubtedly waiting for him to go on. As he stares into the glossy depths of her eyes, so full of anguish and regret, he feels the dam break, “I do understand. I understand more than you know. When you were taken, all I could think of was how I let it happen. How to get you back. After days had passed, I began to doubt myself, and I began to think–”, his last word is gagged out, jaw and throat muscles clenching, but he forces himself to continue, “I thought about how there was so much I had not told you, or showed you, or learned from you. I thought for just a moment–what if I do not find her? What if I am too late and she is gone by the time I get there? Hurting or dead? You, Tamtey! Dead! And I never would have told you how I felt–how I feel. Because I am a coward.” His words were all rushed, growing in volume until his last statement, which he practically roared out. 

He does not realize he is crying until Tamtey lifts one of her bandaged, shaking hands and wipes away a small accumulation of tears from beneath his eye, “You are not a coward, So’lek.” The tears in his eyes begin to burn anew with anger, “I am! I am older! I should be the wise and brave one. Not the one who hides!” He is sure the others can hear his yelling now, but they do not come rushing from their spots, opting to give him and Tamtey this moment for themselves. 

“You do not always need to be the wise and brave one, So’lek! You are still a person, and you still deserve the right to feel. You are not a coward for that.” 

Tamtey’s words are gentle. Soothing. He stares at her chapped lips, barely nodding as he responds, “You may be right about that. But I am still a coward for never telling you that I care for you.” At his words, Tamtey freezes in front of him, the thumb stroking his cheek sliding to a stop. For a breath, they just look at each other, yellow eyes locked on her moss-colored ones. Then, Tamtey leans into him, her nose only millimeters from his own, “Oel ngati kameie, ma So’lek.” 

So’lek sucks in a breath, heart stuttering beneath his healing ribs, but he does not waste a second, “Oel ngati kameie, ma Tamtey.” Then his hands are at her neck, thumbs brushing the base of her softened jaw as he pulls her into him the rest of the way. Their lips meet, both sets dry from dehydration as they slide against one another. But, So’lek does not mind, because to him it is still perfect. He savors it, the first time he tastes her, because she is just like how he imagined: sweet and something so undeniably Tamtey. In a wink, it is over, the two of them pulling back to rest their foreheads against one another, bare of gear or paint. Just skin on skin. They sit together, breathing each other in. So’lek relishes the moment, painting it into his memory. Eyes still closed, his plush lips part, “There is much to talk about, ma Tamtey. But you need rest.” He cannot see it, but still feels the warm breath that comes from the huff of annoyance Tamtey lets out, “You are such a sourpuss.” 

So’lek leans away from her, brow furrowing in confusion, “A what?” Tamtey just giggles at him, not giving him an answer. Instead, she pulls on his arm, hugging it to her body, “Let’s sleep then!” He cannot help the involuntary blush that rushes to his cheeks at the close contact. Even with this tension snapped between them, she still makes him so nervous. He has never met a woman like Tamtey before, and she was his. He slaps himself internally. Not his. Not yet. Maybe? 

He shakes his head to rid himself of the confusing thoughts swirling in the confines of his skull. 

Instead, he obliges, letting Tamtey’s playful personality win out against his grouchy one once again as he dramatically falls to the ground, pulling her down with him–gentle enough not to hurt her, of course–and she collapses onto him with an oof. 

They just lie there, arms encompassing each other in a tight embrace, Tamtey’s cheek resting on his naked chest. His eyes close, allowing himself to relax for the first time in over a week, when Tamtey’s snorting snicker breaks the peace. So’lek’s eyes peel open, neck tilting to look down at the woman resting on his pec. She is looking up at him, cheek squished against his muscle. Cute. 

He sighs, “What is it, Tamtey?”

She just snorts again, voice taunting him as she proclaims, “You like me!” So’lek groans, eyes rolling far into his head out of exasperation. 

“Go to sleep, Tamtey.” He cannot keep the fondness from his voice, one side of his mouth flickering into a smile. She just giggles again, smacking a wet kiss to his unclothed front, “Mwah! I can’t wait to tell everyone that you have a crush on me!” The shake of his chest is uncontrollable, Tamtey’s head flopping up and down on top of it from the strength of his laugh, “Tamtey!” She just cackles from her spot, chin digging into his skin. 

When they finally pull themselves together, So’lek presses a kiss to the crown of her head, “Goodnight, ma yawne.” She whispers it back, eyes falling closed.

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The sound of a swarm of ritis' leathery wings fluttering in the open air was like a lullaby to Tamtey’s ears; light and repetitive like the hums of a gentle song. Around her, the air was warm and caressing–an embrace. Just outside the entrance, Tamtey stood still, swaying slightly with the breeze. She watched as the Ke’awa Kame’tire moved about their small camp, crushing up herbs and cooking strips of meat from their latest hunt. For a few moments, she took it all in, eyes wandering across the expanse of the dwelling in search of her small family. 

There, by the large fire at the center of it all, were Teylan and Ri’nela–helping to stoke the flames. Rasi was across from them, engaging a small group of Kame’tire herbalists in a traditional Sarentu story. Her hands moved in large motions, weaving through the air to aid in her interpretation. Tamtey’s thick upper lip lifts at the sight. After so long, they were finally able to just live amongst the people. As Sarentu. As Na’vi. 

Tamtey turns away from the warm scene, looking out into the darkening sky. Eclipse would soon come, and there was still no sign of Nor or So’lek. She knew they were just out hunting, something they do together multiple times a week to help work out Nor’s anger. After all these years, Nor still holds on to so much of it. Not that Tamtey can blame him. Even with the newfound peace, they were all still wary. The two oldest men of their clan, as strong and capable as they were, still set her on edge when they were not within her sight. As Olo’eykte, Tamtey had constant eyes and ears on her people. Unfortunately for them all, the end of the constant war with the Sky People did not change that. 

She let one more look of longing peak over the horizon before she gave a huff and moved to join her other clanmates at the communal fire. Tamtey sat down in the small open spot between Teylan and Ri’nela, eagerly welcoming their light touches of affection. Teylan’s fidgeting hands found Tamtey’s bare arm, gripping it lightly as he rambles out a greeting to her. Without taking a breath, he goes right into a conversation with another Na’vi. On her other side, Ri’nela’s hand finds Tamtey’s shoulder, grasping it with her long fingers. 

“Still no signs of your mate, ma Tamtey?” Ri’nela’s voice is teasing, even after all this time. Tamtey and So’lek have been mated before Eywa for just over three years, yet the other Sarentu still like to poke fun at their romance. 

Tamtey rolls her eyes, shrugging Ri’nela’s hand off with a smile.

“No..” Tamtey knows she sounds whiny, but does nothing to fix it, causing Ri’nela to bark out a short laugh. Tamtey growls, playfully pushing at Ri’nela to disrupt her from her seat. All she gets in return is more tinkling laughter. 

The two women settle down after a moment, basking in the warmth of the orange flames and one another’s calming presence. As time goes on, Tamtey finds herself zoning out as she stares into the dancing fire. Thoughts swarm her mind, of the past and the present. A headache is starting to form behind her large eyes. 

She cannot even think of the future without a shot of anxiety streaking through her chest. Before she can truly panic, she feels her ears flicker back at the sound of flapping behind them. Too quickly to go unseen, Tamtey turns the upper half of her body to look back towards the entrance of the camp. Through the gaps in the bark, she sees the familiar colors of Iley’s skin, light blues and purples blending into the foliage around him. Jumping from the large ikran’s back is So’lek, her enchanting mate. The older man waltzes into camp, hips swaying as he talks to Nor in what Tamtey can already hear is a chiding tone, his deep voice filtering through the gaps in surrounding conversations. 

So’lek and Nor make it to the fire together, bantering like two young brothers. Tamtey looks up at the two men as they approach, Ri’nela and Teylan mirroring her action. Across the fire, Rasi’s story has stopped.

“Oh, stop your arguing! Ma Nor, come sit and eat.” The elder’s voice rings out around them, firm and unmoving. Above them, Nor groans, moving away from So’lek to Rasi’s side and collapsing next to her with a thud. Rasi’s volume lowers, but Tamtey can still hear her gentle beration. 

Chuckling, Tamtey stands to face her lover. Before her, So’lek’s eyes soften at the sight of her. Tension leaving his shoulders and lines on his face smoothening. Gently, he extends his hand from his forehead in greeting to her. Tamtey does the same, then shoots forward to press a noisy kiss on his scarred cheek. Against his will, purple floods So’lek’s cheeks. He is still a hardened warrior, and public displays of affection are hard for him–but ut he puts up with it for her.

For Tamtey.

He grumbles, face lowering to the ground as his mate giggles. His lips twitch involuntarily at the sound. So’lek’s gaze stays put as Tamtey takes his hand, guiding him out of the main camp. His eyes only lift to watch Tamtey’s back as she leads him to the small cave opening that was given to them as their sanctuary during their visit to the Kame’tire. His eyes follow the sway of his mate’s tail, watching it swish back and forth. 

Flick. Flick. 

So’lek bites his lip at the sight.

Tamtey pulls him into the small cave, pushing aside woven beaded curtains hung up by Ri’nela to offer the Sarentu some privacy. After all this time, the younger Sarentu are still modest, something they have not unlearned from their time at TAP. 

A small hearth sits in the center of the large space, flames barely still burning after being left unattended for so long. Around it are small leather bags– full of tradeables, cups full of water, and resting mats covered in colorful Aranahe blankets. 

So’lek moves to the largest mat furthest from the entrance, carefully sitting down and removing the harsh fabric of his vest. He watches as Tamtey stokes the fire back to life, adding kindling to strengthen the flames. She brushes her hands on the material of her tewng, dusting off any remaining ash. Tamtey walks to him, sitting at his side to help unbuckle the last of his protective gear. 

So’lek’s vest is cast aside, trinkets tinkling as they hit the rock beneath them. And finally, he allows himself to breathe, inhaling the scent of his mate. He hums, closing his eyes to take it in. It is his favorite smell in the world, herbal and spiced like a tea that only he can drink. His arms open, beckoning his mate into his hold. 

She goes keenly, nuzzling into So’lek’s throat as he hugs her. They sit, unmoving and basking in each other’s company. It is Tamtey who pulls away first.

“You took longer than expected.” It’s an observation, not an accusation. She is never accusatory. So’lek nods, humming affirmatively. 

“Yes, we were chasing many animals today. Nor is still too loud at times–like a stumbling hexapede calf.” 

Tamtey giggles at her mate’s words. Nor tries his best to be a stealthy hunter, but he is impatient. That has never changed. 

“So no meat?” She questions. So’lek shakes his head, “Not tonight, ma yawne.” 

Tamtey sighs in mock exasperation. 

“I’m going to wither away!” She falls to the side, mimicking a faint, sliding to the ground. 

So’lek rolls his eyes. His mate is so eccentric. Still, he humors her, pulling her up back to a sitting position. 

“Now, we cannot have that. Sit. I will cook for you.” Ah. Tamtey’s mate of little words. How she loves him so.

He is already up, moving to the fire to start roasting the leftover mushrooms from last night’s dinner. Tamtey watches in silence, stomach beginning to twist in apprehension. She feels like she might puke suddenly. She takes a deep breath, crossing her legs and centering herself. Quietly, she speaks, 

“Ma So’lek?” He must hear the nerves in her voice, because immediately, he turns away from the fire. His eyes find hers, assessing. 

“Yes, ma Tamtey?” His voice is low, but not pushy. He is always so patient when it comes to her. She gulps, taking in a shaky breath–abruptly, her eyes are startlingly wet. So’lek’s naked brows furrow at the distress of his mate. He turns to pull the roasting food from the fire, placing it far away from the heat. He is calm, like always, as he makes his way back to his beloved. Silently, he sits facing her, legs crossed. Then, his hands were on her knees, thumbs rubbing in calm circles. He waits, large golden eyes watching Tamtey as she struggles to blink away the newfound tears at the corners of her shining orbs.

Slowly, she finds her voice. 

“I saw Anufi this morning. While you were out.”

So’lek’s face remains unchanged, but Tamtey can see the question in his eyes.

“Saw her where?” He asks bemusedly. She looks away, eyes floating across the room, desperate to find anything else to focus on. So’lek notices instantly, one hand moving from her knee to cup her cheek. 

“Tamtey.” The deep rumble of his voice grounds her, bringing her back to the moment. She finds his gaze again, her own eyes flickering between his. Her tongue flicks out to lick her lips; a nervous tick. 

“I did not see her out and about, ma So’lek. I went to her–”. She pauses briefly. “For her aid.” So’lek’s nose scrunches, brows furrowing even deeper. His eyes trail over her body, searching. 

“For what? You are hurt?” Concern tinges his tone, hand falling from her cheek to turn her head back and forth, checking for cuts and bruises or any other ailments. Her own hand lifts to catch his wrist, pulling it from her face to her chest. She holds it there, over her now pounding heart. 

“No, ma tiyawn. I am not hurt. It is…something else.” The tears in her eyes are back, her voice cracking as she pushes the rest of her words out. “I am scared to tell you.”

So’lek’s breath catches, his heart fluttering erratically beneath his ribs. Fear creeps up inside of him as he looks to where his hand is held against Tamtey’s chest, grasping the weave of her chest piece. His grip tightens. 

“You are sick?” His voice is unnaturally quiet. Whispered. He sounds scared, something Tamtey rarely hears from her mate. She shakes her head back and forth. 

“No?” He questions. Tamtey nods. He swallows loudly, lips pursed as he thinks. She is not sick, but it is obvious that there is something wrong.

His free hand goes to the other side of her chest, palm flat against her collarbone in an attempt to calm her. She is openly crying now, tears rolling slowly down her face, leaving long streaks behind. Still, she does not speak. So’lek feels restless; he rocks forward slightly, mouth parting to talk to her. Their faces are inches apart.

“You know you can tell me anything, Tamtey. Anything.” He takes a breath. “What is it you are scared to tell me?” He tries to keep his emotions in check, intent on being strong for his mate during her time of torment. Tamtey nods, blowing out a breath of air. She inhales and exhales. Once. Twice. 

Finally, she speaks. 

“It is something that will affect both of us. All of us. The entire clan. I do not know how to go about it.” So’lek frowns at the worry he hears in Tamtey’s voice. 

“Then we will face it together, ma tanhi. You do not need to do it alone–Never alone.”

The first hint of a smile breaks through on Tamtey’s face. Her So’lek is always so brave, no matter the circumstance. 

“Just…don’t freak out.” Her words are timid, and So’lek’s eyes widen slightly. Why would he freak out? He nods affirmatively, thumbs rubbing circles over her collarbones. 

Tamtey’s hands grip both of his, watery eyes locked onto his amber ones. She speaks. 

“I am pregnant.”

So’lek’s blood feels like it freezes within his veins. He does not move, his breath caught in his lungs. His mouth opens and closes, words lost to him. He does not know what to say. The shock of his mate's revelation has him quiet. And, Tamtey does not take his silence well. Instantly, she is sobbing, eyes clenched shut, and chin dipped as she cries in front of him. So’lek scrambles, hands moving to grasp her face. 

“Look at me, ma Tamtey. Open your eyes.” She sniffles, eyes fluttering open as she tries to blink the water from her corneas. He licks his lips, eyes finding his mates’. 

“You are sure of this?” He asks, voice quaking. Tamtey lets out a self-deprecating laugh.

“I am. Anufi confirmed it for me this morning–” She blinks long,“–I have had a feeling.”

So’lek nods, in what he hopes is a reassuring manner. His thumbs brush over her damp cheeks, in the sunken bags below her eyes. His mate has been tired lately.

One thumb traces her Sarentu mark, slowly. 

“What did she say?” He asks her, voice still low and gentle. Tamtey sniffs.

“She thinks I am almost two months along now. I am not yet showing,” Tamtey’s eyes turn downcast, “Are you mad?” 

So’lek lets out a quick string of no’s, shushing his mate. 

“No, ma yawne. Of course not. I–” He flounders for a second, moving to rest his forehead against Tamtey’s. He lets his skin press into the beads of Tamtey’s headband. “I am so happy.”

Tears have begun to collect in his own eyes, the news now fully settling into his body. Tamtey lets out a short sob. 

“You are?” She sounds so incredulous, like the possibility of So’lek being overjoyed at the news was not an option. He pulls back enough to give her a long kiss on her forehead, his lips placed firmly for a breath. Finally, he meets her eyes again. 

“My words cannot even begin to explain how I feel in this moment, ma Tamtey.” His mate raises a brow. 

“Try your best, skxawng.” There is his feisty lover. He chuckles lowly, wiping the dried tear marks from Tamtey’s face. 

“Are you unhappy with this?” He must ask before he bares himself fully to her. His mate’s well-being and desires come far before his own. Tamtey stiffens slightly at his question, waiting for a beat. 

“No. I am not. And that makes me feel…guilty? Why do I get to have this? When so many others I have known will never get the chance–” Her voice cracks. So’lek knows she thinks of her sister. Forever a child. 

Tamtey scoots closer, whispering so close to So’lek’s face that he can feel her breath on his lips. “I do not think I have ever felt so happy, ma So’lek. Does that make me a bad person?”

Oh, his sweet Tamtey. Always so selfless, even in moments when she deserves to feel nothing but joy. 

“No, ma Tamtey. No. You deserve to feel excited. Happy. After everything you have been through, you deserve it more than most.” 

Tamtey smiles at him, meek and sad. 

“It does not feel like it.” Her words are like stones in his heart. He stiffens, voice hardening to leave no room for disagreement. 

“You are one of the best warriors on Pandora. You have survived a massacre, abuse, and much fighting. You have done everything in your power to unite your people and make a new name for your clan.” He pauses, putting extra emphasis on his next words. 

“You can have this, ma yawne.” Tamtey moves her head up and down, reluctantly accepting her mate’s words. 

“I want it, ma So’lek. So badly.” He presses a chaste kiss to her chapped lips. 

“Then you shall have it.” 

Together, they sit in silence. Taking in the situation that will change their lives forever. So’lek is the first to break. 

“I must admit something, ma Tamtey…I am starting to freak out, or however you call it.” Tamtey laughs openly in front of him. 

“You are now realizing the weight of my words?” She teases. So’lek huffs out a large breath, neck craning to look at the ceiling. 

“Am I not too old to be a father now?” His voice is light, exasperated. But, he can still hear the truthful fear behind it. His mate catches it at once. 

“You are not even old, ma So‘lek. Do not act as if you are an elder. You are still young! Strong and fast enough to chase around our ‘evi.”

So’lek chokes, blindly hugging Tamtey close to his chest. 

Their child. 

Never in his adult life had he thought he would one day have this. A mate. A child. A family. Eywa has truly blessed him. May the Great Mother continue to guide him. He melts into Tamtey, face nuzzling into her neck. He sucks in large lungfuls of air, breathing her in. Now that he focuses, he thinks he detects the slight scent of something milky; evidence of her pregnancy. 

He pulls back, hands grasping her waist lightly. He is trying not to cry, but he knows he will soon fail.

“Thank you, ma Tamtey.” He knows his voice is warbled, choked off from the tears that cling to the inside of his throat. Tamtey just smiles at him, grabbing one of his hands from where it sits at her waist and bringing it down to her still flat stomach. So’lek’s hand flattens there, barely putting pressure on the soft skin. 

“You do not need to thank me, ma So’lek. You are the one who made this happen!” She pushes gently on the hand that touches her stomach. So’lek shakes his head, disagreeing. 

“No. You are the mother of our child. You will grow them. Nourish them. I cannot give you enough thanks–enough of anything to ever give you what you have given me on this day.” So’lek knows he will work the rest of his life to take care of his mate. He will provide everything for her and their child. She will want for nothing. Work for nothing. 

He rubs a gentle circle over her stomach with his flattened palm.

“Our prrnen will grow strong, just like their mother.” His voice is still grainy, but he does his best to wrangle it in. Tamtey just giggles at him, hand holding onto his wrist over her abdomen. Her mate was so sensitive under all that hardened exterior.

“Or like their father. They will have two mighty warriors as parents, you know?” So’lek lets out a low chuckle at her teasing.

“This is true.” His eyes rest on her face, caressing the slight glow of her tanhi as it traces her forehead and nose. He leans forward to press a kiss to her cheek. “I hope they get your beauty, ma yawne.” He hears Tamtey snort. Lightly, she pushes him back with a shove. 

“Stop that!” He grins in response, amused by her annoyance. He just sits back, watching her. Suddenly, a thought springs to the forefront of his mind. 

“How do you want to tell the others?” 

Tamtey’s eyes widen. It is so clear that his mate has not even thought of telling their clan.

“Oh, ma Eywa, I didn’t even think of that! What will they say? Ri’nela will be beside herself!” Tamtey’s voice is hushed, hesitant to be loud out of fear that someone will somehow hear her. Her hand goes to her forehead, rubbing it anxiously. So’lek watches on, enamored. 

“I think your family will be happy. Especially Rasi, she will see the clan grow once again.” He reassures her, petting any of her exposed skin he can see. Tamtey’s eyes narrow at him. 

“Our family.” He rolls his eyes at the tone. 

“Yes, yes. Our family.” He says. Tamtey nods approvingly, content with his response. Her eyes then flicker to the entrance, where the Sarentu clan has finally begun to filter in to settle and rest for the remainder of the evening. 

There goes their time to plan. Personally, So’lek has no problems waiting, but he knows his mate found it hard to keep any sort of secret. 

The four Sarentu shuffle in, Rasi and Nor silent as Ri’nela listens to Teylan ramble about something yet again. It never ends with that boy. The eldest Na’vi, observant as ever, is the first to take note of their position. It is not unusual for them to be so close, but So’lek is sure Rasi can see the remnants of tears in their eyes and the puffiness of their faces. At once, she turns to the three younger Na’vi, shushing them. She beckons for them to sit around the fire, quietly. Nor, Ri’nela and Teylan do so quickly, eyes flickering over So’lek and Tamtey’s intertwined forms. At that moment, they notice something is amiss. They all settle in, Rasi following them as they sit across the fire from the two mates. They are all silent, too afraid to ask what worries the two. 

Ri’nela, always the determined tsahik, decides to break the stillness.

“What is wrong? You two look…upset.” She presses the last word lightly, obviously spotting the swelling of the couple’s undereyes. 

So’lek shifts to move to the side of Tamtey, sitting directly next to her. His large hand rests on one of her thighs as a comforting weight. So’lek is silent, looking to Tamtey with a questioning look in his eye, seeking a direction to move in. Approval. 

He gets it from a small nod of Tamtey’s head in response. 

Around the room, the Sarentu are restless. Teylan’s constant fidgeting has only worsened while the others sway slightly in their spots, eyes flying around the room from one to the other, then to the couple across from them in rapid succession. As So’lek opens his mouth to speak, he is immediately cut off by the panicked sound of Teylan’s voice.

“Is someone dead?” 

“No one is dead, Teylan.” A fond Tamtey states. Ever since the incident with Alma and the other resistance members, the youngest Sarentu was more anxious about the well-being of his loved ones. If it weren’t bad enough before. 

“Then what is it?” Teylan asks, bare brows furrowed in confused distress. Tamtey and So’lek share another look, an unspoken conversation understood only by the two of them. Then, softly, So’lek shares the news. 

“Tamtey is with child.”

At the words, everyone seems to stop breathing, backs going ramrod straight as shock overcomes their lean frames. The six of them sit in silence for a beat, until finally Tamtey breaks the tension with an amused snicker. “Close your mouth, Nor, or you’ll let a lortsyal in.” At the words, Nor clamps his mouth shut, eyes bugging from his skull. Only one more second of quietness fills the cavern before the sound of choked weeping resonates off the dense walls around them. Five pairs of glowing eyes fly to where the eldest Sarentu sits, crying with her wrinkled hands cupping her uplifted cheeks. Between them on her lips sits a smile, large and bright despite her tears. 

“Rasi?” Ri’nela asks from next to her, voice dropped to an anxious whisper. The elder mutters something intelligible under her breath, moving her hands to the ground and bowing her head to meet the rock. “Oh Great Mother, thank you.” Carefully, Rasi gets up to make her way to where So’lek and Tamtey sit, necks craned back to look up at her as she approaches. The eldest wipes the tears from her cheeks, then places her damp hands on one of Tamtey’s and one of So’lek’s shoulders, gripping strongly. Lovingly. “Eywa has blessed you both–has blessed our clan. To continue on and grow. She has never turned her back on us, even after all these years,” Her eyes blink blurrily up at the ceiling, speaking to the world, “We will traverse the land once again, as a family, and bring our stories to all. Perhaps we will even gain some new members on our way,” Rasi’s fangs meet the edge of her lower lip, smile taking over her face, “Nìt'iluke emrayey”.

So’lek’s hand comes up to find Rasi’s on his shoulder, grasping it tightly, head bowed in silent thanks. Tamtey, ever the more exuberant one, hauls herself onto her feet and throws herself into Rasi’s arms, “Thank you, Rasi,” her voice quaking. Rasi returns the hug enthusiastically, squeezing Tamtey close to her chest. Silently, So’lek gets to his feet next to them, lone hand going to rest on Tamtey’s lower back. Chaos erupts around them, suddenly. Cacophonic sounds reverberate off the rock. The other three Sarentu are surrounding them at once, hands flying out to slap on So’lek’s back or pull Tamtey into a warm embrace. Teylan babbles about needing to learn more about babies, Nor gives his monotone congratulations, and Ri’nela cries. She is a blubbering mess, hands holding her younger sister to her chest, her sleek nose buried in Tamtey’s ornamented neck. 

Tamtey holds her there, large hand caressing the top of Ri’nela’s head like a mother comforting a child. The other members of the clan watch them, taking in the moment the two sisters share. Tamtey and Ri’nela had been through a lot together, not just in TAP but as clan leaders who had to make their own path. The two were now renowned tsahik and olo’eykte, known across the lands as kind, fierce, and persevering. Never did they have time to think that this could happen to one of them. A new family member, to grow and learn the ways of the Sarentu with their family by their side. Something they never got to get during their childhoods. 

Ri’nela pulls away, sucking in large lungfuls of air, “I am so happy, Tamtey. We will teach them to be a great leader. A great sibling and a great friend. They will want for nothing.” Her voice cracks on the last word, the realness of the situation seeping in. The six of them could offer a rewarding life to this new child, as Na’vi. “You will be such a wonderful mother,” her eyes move to So’lek, hesitating briefly before also throwing herself against So’lek, arms wrapping around him, “And you will be a great father. Protective. We will have to teach your child both the Sarentu and the Trr’ong ways!”

So’lek relaxes a bit in Ri’nela’s arms, finally allowing himself to bring his own around her in a light embrace, “Thank you, Ri’nela.” Then, Ri’nela is back in front of Tamtey, hands moving to the younger’s stomach straight away. She palpates gently, gasping softly, “How far along are you, ma Tamtey? How have I not noticed this yet? Are you sick? Have you seen Anufi yet?” Her questions are flying from her mouth, words fast and concerned. Tamtey giggles, hands resting over Ri’nela’s on her still flattened stomach.

“I am okay. Anufi saw me just this morning,” she rubs over the backs of Ri’nela’s hands soothingly, “You couldn’t have known. I barely noticed myself. If I were sick, I just made myself scarce for a bit.” Ri’nela’s brows furrow at the younger’s admission, tsking under breath. “Ma Tamtey, you could have come to me! You have been throwing up, I take it?” Tamtey smiles sheepishly, shrugging. Ri’nela rolls her eyes, hands moving to gesture outwardly, “You did not answer my other question!” 

Tamtey huffs dramatically, “Oh ma Eywa, you people! Let a girl rest!” So’lek groans beside her, “You are so difficult, ma yawne,” He flicks one of her ears gently, earning a little yelp from his mate. “She told me around two months.” His question is directed at Ri’nela, before he turns slightly to Tamtey, “Just a moment, did you say you have been sick, ma Tamtey?” Tamtey giggles nervously, eyes refusing to make contact as she looks at anyone else but her mate. Rasi seems to be the only one to see her cry for help. 

“Alright, my family, settle. We will eat by the fire, and talk–we must let Tamtey rest.” The others agree at once, moving to sit at the hearth, all of them struggling to sit as close to Tamtey as possible. They eat together, questions and conversation deep and constant for hours past the time they finished their food. After eclipse had far gone by, and silence had taken over the entirety of the Kame’tire’s camp, they made their separate ways to their resting mats for sleep. Soon, they will announce it to the Kame’tire and take their departure, to the Kinglor Forest first to spread their news. Celebrations were surely in order.

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As Olo’eykte of her clan, and the one carrying the child, Tamtey delivered the news to the Kame’tire, only three days after she told her fellow Sarentu. The clan of healers was ecstatic, insisting on throwing a night of celebration for the new addition to the Sarentu clan. It had been many decades since a new Sarentu was born, and Eywa had blessed them with a gift. So, they partied. Tamtey made her rounds with So’lek, and the others trailed behind them. Not even a full day later, they set out to the Kinglor forest to tell the Aranahe of their announcement.

Tamtey had never felt such excitement in her life. Not since escaping TAP and building her life as Na’vi. But now, she shared this with So’lek and her brethren. Together, they would bring hope to the neighboring clans. Life can and would continue under Eywa’s watchful eye. 

The Aranahe took it well, of course, they would. There was another celebration there, gifts and food given to Tamtey and So’lek throughout the night. Their stay there was short, not even a week long. Then they flew to the Zeswa. In the Upper Plains, they partied harder than before. The Zeswa sisters were brimming with joy, calling for zangke, music, and dancing. The Sarentu danced and sang, and told stories all night long. Someone even got So’lek and Nor to drink zangke, enormous amounts of it. Guess who won…Another two weeks passed there, and finally, the Sarentu made their way back to the Boundless Range, which was now their consistent home. So’lek’s solitude became all of theirs. As Sarentu, they roamed freely and frequently, but it was nice having a place that was theirs. Permanent for them if they needed it.

Upon their arrival at the small floating mountains, Tamtey is now roughly three months pregnant, and still no one could tell– especially if they weren’t looking. Gracefully, she hopped from Nimun’s back, cooing at her beloved ikran. She gives her bonded a small nuzzle on her snout, shooing her to go take a rest. The others bustle about around her, unpacking things and talking about their plans for the next day. Tamtey left them behind, climbing her way up the small rocks to sit up by one of So’lek’s murals. She swayed softly, eyes following the strokes of paint across the stone. One of her hands cupped her lower stomach softly, where a small bulge was finally making itself known. She rubbed softly, feeling the firmness there. Tamtey smiled, humming their Sarentu song to herself and her growing child. At some point, she closes her eyes, basking in the sun and humming tunes. She smells him before she hears him. So’lek has made his way to her, sitting cross-legged next to her leaner and shorter frame. He just sits there, watching her as she hums peacefully. Always so beautiful. 

“What are you doing up here alone, ma Tamtey?” His voice is deep, amused. Tamtey cracks one of her eyes open, glancing at her mate, “To get away from you, old man.” So’lek rolls his eyes at her words, scoffing under his breath. He says nothing else, used to her jokes. Instead, he moves to sit behind her, legs bracketing hers and arms enveloping her waist. His calloused hand replaces her own on her stomach, drawing lazy, lingering circles with his thumb. “You still have been sick in the mornings. Are the teas Ri’nela has given you not working?” He asks, pressing a kiss to the back of Tamtey’s neck. All he gets in response is a shake of her head. So’lek sighs, flattening his palm on the slight bump where their child lives. “Our ‘evi is giving you much trouble, ma yawne. A mighty warrior already in the making.” Tamtey huffs, leaning further into So’lek’s chest at his words, “Yes, they are. But it will all be worth it, to be called sa’nu, by a child that I hope looks just like you.” So’lek tuts under his breath, refuting the latter end of her statement. “You will be the perfect mother, and I hope they get your beauty—,” he pauses, digging his chin into Tamtey’s shoulder and nuzzling into her neck, “—for you are the most enchanting creature I have ever met.” Tamtey giggles, turning in his hold to come face to face with her older mate. 

“You flatter me, ma tìyawn.” 

“I speak only the truth, you know I do not lie,” says So’lek, face set in a stern expression. All Tamtey can do is smile. She is mated to the most kindhearted, soft-spoken man. How did she manage to get so lucky in this life? Even after everything she has done and everything that has happened to her, she still gets a happy ending. Then So’lek rocks forward, leaving a wet kiss on Tamtey’s nose, “What shall we name them?” 

Tamtey hums, considering, “I think we will know when we see them for the first time.” So’lek nods, “No expectations. I like this idea.” He smiles broadly, leaning into Tamtey to pepper kisses across the width of her neck. She giggles, patting his back, “That tickles! Get off, get off!” So’lek does not relent, nipping at her neck and growling playfully. Tamtey bats at him, urging him to sit back. Finally, he does with a groan, “You let me have no fun.” 

“Oh please,” rolling her eyes, Tamtey smiles as she smacks a kiss on So’lek’s scarred cheek, “Up we get! We should help the others unpack.” Her mate nods, getting up before offering a hand to help her alongside him. Together, they go back down to the large open space, moving from person to person to help wherever they can. It was time for them to settle, make this place a home ready for a child, and for all of them to grow. 

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~6 months later 

Tamtey paces, hands settled on her lower back. It was almost dark, and she lost track of how many times she had gone from one end of their resting place to the next. It had to have been hundreds of times at this point. Nothing helped the spasms that overtook the area where her hands rested. Rasi and Ri’nela watched from close by, worried looks etched on their faces as they discussi something quietly. Tamtey had been restless for hours, and still she insisted they do not call So’lek. He had been out since the early morning, against his will and to Tamtey’s insistence. Ever since Tamtey had gotten into her later months of pregnancy, So’lek was reluctant to leave her side for any reason. He was extremely protective of her nowadays, especially since she moved slowly like a roaming zakru, sleeping and grazing throughout the day. Unable to thoroughly keep herself safe. Tamtey secretly adored the doting, but today she knew something was going to happen with the baby, and So’lek did not need to see the beginning of it. He was too worrisome, and Tamtey did not want him to stress so early in. Now, she regrets her decision. 

So’lek has only been gone for a span of six or so hours, but it felt like an eternity to Tamtey. He had gone out with the boys to hunt and re-supply their stashes, and it had just passed into the latter half of the afternoon. Ri’nela and Rasi wanted to call him at once, but truthfully, Tamtey did not want to bother him. Feeling like a burden is still something she continuously works on. But the pain is getting sharper, and all she wants is to be in her mate’s arms again. So, on her returning pace back to her and So’lek’s resting mat, she stops for the first time in a while and turns to the two other female Sarentu. 

“Alright, you guys can call So’lek—,” she pauses, hand flying out to point accusatorily at Ri’nela, “—do not stress him out! Just tell them all to come back for the night. Maybe leave out the fact that I am in labor out of it.” Rasi groaned, “Ma Tamtey, he has to know! He would want to be here as fast as possible!” Tamtey sighed, swaying slightly to alleviate any pressure on her pelvis, “That is the point. He does not need to hurry! I am not even close to giving birth.” The other two women stared at the laboring Na’vi, scared of agitating her while she was in this state. But then, Ri’nela moves to Tamtey, hand caressing her pseudosister’s belly, “It may be fast, it may not. We do not know how it will go. Every Na’vi is different during this process. You and I both know this. Let us tell him.” 

Tamtey swallows roughly, “Then I will call them back in myself. He should hear it from me. Know I’m okay.” The other two women agree, standing off to the side as Tamtey retrieves her comms from her living space. Over the years, she tries to wear them less and less, especially while at home. Luckily, So’lek, forever the fighter, has refused. Shakily, she presses down on the thick buttons and speaks into the microphone, “So’lek, are you there?” Prickling static splutters out across the radio waves, before a click resounds and So’lek speaks, “Yes, ma Tamtey. What is it?” She sucks in a deep breath, glancing over at Ri’nela and Rasi for support. They give hurried, encouraging nods back. 

“Everything is fine, but I think you, Nor, and Teylan should come back soon.” Subtle. Not misleading. Good. But of course, So’lek picks up on her unease at once, “What is wrong?” His voice is low in register, concern twinging the tone. Tamtey grimaces, hesitating to answer. Her fingers rub the button softly as she debates her next words, “I may or may not be in labor?” Her voice ends in an unsure lilt, and she knows immediately it was the wrong thing to say. The comms are silent for more than a minute, and Tamtey looks over to Ri’nela and Rasi with worry in her bright eyes, eager to tell them this was a bad idea. But then her mate speaks, “I am coming.” The comms cut off with a sharp click, and Tamtey reels back a bit at the loudness of it. She turns in a half circle to face the other two Sarentu, shrugging. Looks like it worked. So’lek might be a little concerned, but what's done is done. Together, the three of them move to the small pool of water in the center of the large cavern and sit at its edges. They talk softly, Tamtey moaning as the contractions take over her bent form, Ri’nela sat behind her to help rub out the clenched muscles. 

They sit there for a while, Tamtey breathing in through her nose and out through her mouth, time passing. Eventually, the flap of an ikran’s wings flutters from the entrance of the cave, the screech she knows belongs to Iley filling the air. All at once, Tamtey’s body sags and her breathing steadies, relief surging through her. In moments, So’lek is at her side, breaths coming out fast and heavy from his plush lips. He crouches beside her, taking her sweaty face into his rough hands, “When did this start? How long have you been like this? Is the baby truly coming?” His voice is quaking as it rushes out of his mouth. Tamtey blinks lazily up at him, hand coming to grasp his wrist. “Tam tam, ma So’lek. Everything is well.” He swallows, wetting his dried throat and licking his wind-torn lips. He turns to Ri’nela, bombarding the tsahik with even more questions, “When did she start? Was it long after I left? Is everything well with the two of them?” He pauses, turning back to Tamtey, “Why didn’t you tell me right away?” Tamtey looks into her mate's eyes–finding nothing but worry and fear. Maybe she was wrong to call him so late. 

“We didn’t call because I told them not to. I did not want to worry you while I was still in the early stages.” So’lek’s eyes widen at her words, “Are you not still in the early stages?” Tamtey’s ears go back, eyes flitting to the right where Ri’nela sits at her side. The older Sarentu sighs, taking the hint to start speaking, “Tamtey is well into it now. The baby could be here by the end of the night. Or tomorrow morning. We do not know for certain.” So’lek’s eyes clench close for a moment, tail flickering behind him–he stays crouched, taking in Tamtey’s appearance. 

“Are you comfortable, ma yawne? What can I do for you?” His fingers brush over her cheeks, caressing them before wiping the sweat from her brow with the back of his hand. Before she can respond, Tamtey’s breath hitches as her stomach contracts again, not long after the one she just had. She whimpers, fingers clenching So’lek’s wrist hard as pain wracks her body. Her mate stiffens next to her, free hand moving to hold her at her waist. He mutters words of affection to her, talking her through it. All Tamtey says after the contraction is over is, “Walk with me.”

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Many more hours had passed, and Tamtey had only gotten more miserable. She knew labor and childbirth would be uncomfortable, but Eywa did it hurt. She had stopped pacing long ago, instead sitting in between So’lek’s legs with her knees spread open to relieve any possible pressure on her hips. Her mate has never looked so worried, hands rubbing over the expanse of her thighs as he murmured words of encouragement into her ear. She had removed her chest piece long ago and insisted So’lek remove his too so they could sit skin to skin. Only a small shawl covered her sex, her own requirement. The others did not need to see it more than necessary. Then, a contraction ripped through her that felt different from the others. More intense. Pressurising. 

“Agh–I think it is time, ma So’lek.” Her mate stiffens at her words, legs tightening the bracket around her, “You are sure?” His voice is gruff, true fear seeping into his voice. Tamtey’s heart ached for her mate, knowing anything regarding her health distressed him deeply. She nods, unable to speak another word. Tamtey’s back shakes as So’lek barks out for Ri’nela, urging her to come at once. The tsahik practically runs over from the front of the cave where the entire clan set, far enough away to give Tamtey and So’lek some privacy. She slides to a stop, getting to her knees in front of Tamtey, already knowing why she was summoned, “You are ready?” Tamtey nods hurriedly, moving to sit up a bit more against So’lek’s toned body. As she settles into her new position, Ri’nela throws the shawl covering Tamtey aside, checking the area. 

“Yes, you are ready! You can do this, Tamtey.” The olo’eykte groans, body relaxing in deep respite. She turns her head slightly, beckoning So’lek to come closer. He does instantly. 

“It will be okay, ma So’lek.” He presses a kiss to her neck, then her cheek, smothering her in anything that can bring her a sliver of comfort, “You are radiant, ma yawne. Just a bit longer and our prrnen will be here. In your arms.” His voice is husky, thick with emotion, but Tamtey barely has any time to register his words as another contraction rips through her body. She tenses, holding her breath as she begins to push instinctively. It feels like nothing she has ever felt before–hurts more than any pain given to her by a bullet or knife. It feels like her body is opening too far, but she knows deep down that she is made for this. She pushes for a long time, sweat building and dripping down her face and neck. So’lek is behind her the whole time, hands holding her own as she squashes his fingers. She is in a trance, pushing and huffing and puffing until she feels a change. Burning and pressure like she has not felt previously. Ri’nela exclaims in front of her, “I can see them! Tamtey, I can see them! Feel! Feel!” As soon as the contraction is over, Tamtey sucks in a deep breath, her shaking hand finding its way down to her opening. There at her entrance is a head full of thick hair. She gasps, fingers feeling along the baby’s scalp. 

“So’lek, they are right there! Feel!” She grabs his hand, blood smearing over his skin. But he does not pull away, allowing her to guide him there. He gasps, “Oh, ma Tamtey. You are doing so well.” Tamtey swears she can hear tears in his voice. Maybe in hers, too. 

She only gets another breath before she is working at it again, bearing down, face flushing purple. She doesn’t count them, but surely it cannot be more than a few more, when she suddenly feels a bizarre sense of emptiness. The sense of relief is overwhelming, but before she can relish it, her hands are full of skin. She lifts up, pulling the baby, her baby, to her chest. A sharp cry pierces the air, the baby shrieking at being taken from the comfort of their mother’s womb. Tamtey is sobbing, arms trembling as she holds the baby close to her body. Quickly, she makes tsaheylu with the child, a tradition she has been eager to partake in. The feeling of new life flows within her, and she flushes the connection with soothing hums. 

Behind her, So’lek is crying, “Good job, ma yawne. They are so beautiful.” She can feel the strength of his cries against her back, and leans her head back to search for a kiss. He obliges immediately, kissing her deeply. One of his hands moves from her thighs to help her hold up their baby on one side. 

Ri’nela’s voice is wrecked as she speaks out to them, “It is a girl!” So’lek and Tamtey only sob harder, eyes flying over the new life they made together. She has thick black hair, wispy at the ends. And her skin tone is dark like So’lek’s, her stripes so similar to his. Even his nose sits on their daughter’s face. The only thing that looks like Tamtey is her mouth and the shape of her eyes. “Oh, So’lek, she is perfect. Look at her. Thank you, ma Eywa, thank you.”

So’lek sniffles against her neck, peeking over to get a better look at their baby, “She looks like me,” his voice is wavering. Tamtey loves him so much. She already knows their daughter will want for nothing her entire life. She giggles, “She does! So cute, look at her little nose.” So’lek chuckles against her, brushing a kiss to the crown of Tamtey’s head. They stare at her a bit longer as the baby’s cry weakens the longer she is pressed to her mother’s chest. Then, their daughter’s eyes open. Tamtey gasps. 

“They’re blue!” She is back to sobbing immediately, cupping her daughter’s head in the palm of her hand. She rubs the black curls there, taking in the new discovery, “Just like Aha’ri.” The last part is whispered, brokenly. So’lek just hugs his mate tighter. They sit together, as a family of three, for the first time. Ri’nela moves silently around them, cleaning up Tamtey and applying salves to her sore areas, waiting for the afterbirth. She stops, face covered in tear tracks, “What is her name?”

Tamtey sniffs, looking to So’lek. They stare at each other for a moment, eyes searching. Then, So’lek speaks, voice quiet, to not frighten his daughter, “Hiwaru. Her name is Hiwaru. Isn’t that right, ma tana’ring?” One of his large fingers moves to the baby’s little hands, where she grasps it with all of her fingers, cooing as she looks up at her parents. 

“A beautiful name,” Ri’nela is grinning, so happy and alive. Tamtey has not seen her like this in so long. The hope this brings to her family is so precious. She will never tire of it. 

The rest of the night is a blur, between the afterbirth, cleaning Hiwaru, and introducing her to their clan, Tamtey does not know where time starts or ends. Now, she and So’lek sit, Hiwaru settled in his arms. He has not stopped looking at her, tears welling in his eyes every time she makes a noise up at him. Tamtey smiles at them from their resting spot on the ground, propped up high with furs and pillows to make her comfortable. So’lek’s doing. He looks up at Tamtey, sniffling, “I never thought I would have this. You have given me such a gift, ma yawne. I don’t think I have ever felt such love and joy in all of my years.” Tamtey blinks at her mate, smile broadening, “I feel the same way. I am just glad we can live this together.” So’lek grins back, shushing down at Hiwaru as she lets out heartwrenching cries. Hungry cries. Without thought, Tamtey reaches out for her, and So’lek gives her willingly. He watches in awe as Hiwaru latches onto Tamtey’s chest, sucking greedily. He moves to sit against her, as close as physically possible. He stares down at his daughter, where she feeds on his mate’s milk, tracing the path of her tanhi and taking in her own unique features. Beneath Hiwaru’s bottom lip, to the left side, is a large beauty mark, round and perfect. Her skin is smooth and unblemished, the opposite of his own. In that moment, he promises she will never have a mark carved upon her skin. Not for as long as he is living. 

“I will protect you two with my life, ma soaia.” With that, he gives his mate and his daughter a lingering kiss on their foreheads, encompassing them with his arms. 

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One year later…

The sound of a small child’s giggles fills the air, shrieks and babbles following after. Tamtey grins from where she stands with Ri’nela, watching as Teylan tickles and plays with Hiwaru as she sits in So’lek’s arms. Teylan was her favorite aside from her parents, and the youngest Sarentu prided himself on that. It warmed Tamtey’s heart to see her brother so outgoing. She turns back to Ri’nela, eyes scanning the materials in front of them. This was the second time they would welcome a new member to the clan, officially, before Eywa. And it was for Tamtey’s daughter. She never thought she would live to see this day. 

She worked alongside Ri’nela, readying the paints and mixture to give Hiwaru her official Sarentu mark. Tamtey’s heart raced, anticipation mixing with overwhelming joy. Rasi and Nor waited by the large tarsyu, glowing in the dark, many feet in front of Tamtey and Ri’nela. 

“It is ready,” Ri’nela’s voice is bordering on ecstatic, desperate to maintain her levelheadedness as tsahik. But this was exciting. The first clan-born Sarentu and decades, and she was giving Hiwaru the mark. As tsahik. Tamtey nods, leading the two of them away from the small makeshift crafting area in front of them. Ri’nela goes to Rasi and Nor, greeting them quietly. As she does this, Tamtey reaches So’lek and Teylan, immediately reaching out to poke the tip of her daughter’s nose. The baby girl laughs, arms flailing as she attempts to reach out for Tamtey. And who is Tamtey to say no? Eagerly, she reaches out, taking Hiwaru into her arms, cooing at her with mumbles and sounds. Across from them, Teylan giggles, slinking away to join the others at the tarsyu flower. Then it is just the three of them. So’lek reaches out, brushing a loose braid back behind Tamtey’s ear, the beads clinking against each other softly. 

“Are you ready, Olo’eykte Tamtey?” His voice is teetering on teasing, with just a hint of seriousness. Tamtey snorts, rolling her eyes at him, “Yes, now come along!” She moves away from him without another word, making her way to the tarsyu as So’lek follows behind her, reaching out to swat at her tail. Tamtey turns with Hiwaru in her arms, pouting, “Tell Sempu to stop being mean to Sa’nu!” Hiwaru’s face scrunches, looking grumpily to her father, “No mean!” So’lek’s grin only widens, chuckling at the two girls in front of him. His entire world. “Sorry, ma tana’ring, I will be nicer to Sa’nu.” It is the response their daughter is looking for, because she goes right back to her cheerful self. Hiwaru always had a smile on her face, no matter the occasion or who she was with. Such a happy child. So’lek’s heart ached at the sight. 

Together they go to the tarsyu, stopping in front of the other clan members. Hiwaru babbles into the night, reaching out to anyone close to her. This time, it is Ri’nela who is holding the small shell bowl full of the mixture. She lets Hiwaru latch onto one of her fingers, but does not yet take her. It is customary for the parents to hold the child for their first communion with Eywa. Instead, she reaches out, thumb slick with the agent that would gently mark Hiwaru’s skin. It is over in an instant, just a swipe of her finger pad beneath Hiwaru’s blue eye, right on the cheek. 

“With this mark, you are now officially a member of the Sarentu. May you grow up knowing only peace and love. You will learn many stories and tell them long after they happen. The Great Mother blesses you and accepts you as her child alongside all of her other children. Oel ngati kameie, ma Hiwaru.”

The baby giggles, uncaring of Ri’nela’s actions, but babbles out a mixture of ‘love’ and ‘Sarentu’ that sounds a lot like a bunch of gibberish. But for them, it is enough. Tamtey chuckles, pressing a kiss below Hiwaru’s fresh mark. So’lek does the same. Together they bring her to the tarsyu flower, white and luminous in its stature. The others watch on as they bring Hiwaru’s kuru to the flower, her feet jumping in the air from where So’lek and Tamtey hold her together. Then, she is quiet, pupils widening and eyebrows lifting. She sees all. Feels all. From her ancestors before her, and her parents in front of her. 

So’lek and Tamtey share a look, so full of love and endearment. They grin, tears in their glowing eyes. Their daughter was now one of the people. Together, they would raise her. Love her. They have both never been more at peace. 

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Over the next ten years, So’lek does not expect to have four more children following Hiwaru. But still it happens, for the Great Mother’s children are all blessings. He is a busy man, and Tamtey is even busier. Her body had been through so much, and So’lek marvels at her strength daily. Their next child came three years after Hiwaru–another girl. Beautiful, with features entirely all So’lek, the only difference being her light brown hair taken from Tamtey. Ka’sa was beautiful, confident, and already feisty. So’lek had felt content. His life finally felt full. But then, a year after Ka’sa came their third child, Na’kami. She had been a large baby, fat and round. Her hair was dark like So’lek’s, face like his too, but eyes a bright glowing green. 

So’lek adored her immediately, just like his other daughters. He thought in that moment that yes, this was family. Completed at last. 

He was wrong. 

Not even another year had passed before Tamtey got pregnant with Oare, their fourth daughter. Tamtey had just cackled at the surprised look on his face, uncaring that she would have to go through another long pregnancy. Tamtey loved being pregnant, growing a new life. So’lek cannot say he didn’t like it either. She was always radiant when pregnant, so beautiful. He could barely keep himself off of her. But with Oare things were different. Tamtey was sick the entire time, weak and tired. So’lek had never seen his mate so worn down. Tamtey had gone into early labor, and Oare had been so small. Even now, at a few years old, she was small for her age, blind and deaf on one side, looking just like So’lek but lighter like Tamtey, and hair light. After her birth, Tamtey slept for days, leaving So’lek to care for their newborn alone, without her mother. After that, he told Tamtey no more. No more children. He could not see her like that again. She agreed, fatigued and bleeding. 

But now, three years after that, their fifth child has been born. A boy this time. Perfect in every way. And to So’lek’s delight, he looked every bit like his mother. Light brown hair, hazel eyes, and a light nose. His face is symmetric and soft. Welcoming. The two parents were immediately smitten. They decided to name him Zotam–a gentle, kind name. Now the two of them juggled five children, all young and full of energy. So’lek never stopped smiling these days, happiness filling every crevice of his life. The clan had grown almost twice its size with his family alone, and he felt great pride in that fact. 

His entire family sits around the fire, children entertained by their aunts and uncles as Tamtey rocks Zotam in his prrsmung. Gurgling as she pats his back. So’lek watches on, all of his children content and alive. Hiwaru, the ever-doting eldest sister, hops from sibling to sibling to check on them. Her voice was high and light in the air around them. She was so happy. Surrounded by family. In his heart, he finally feels like he has finished his mission in life. This is what he has always been destined to do. 

He squats by Tamtey, kissing Zotam on his soft head, scenting him softly. Then, he moves to Tamtey, nuzzling into her neck, unmoving. He falls to his bottom next to her, resting in the comforting presence of his mate. She nuzzles against the top of his head, muttering affectionately at the man. 

Eclipse has only just begun, darkness lighting up the tanhi across Iley’s skin. The dots blur into lines as we fly through the sky, banking from left to right, then left again. Behind me, Nimun screeches as Tamtey’s laugh fills the warm air. We have been flying for a while now, weaving in between floating mountains and mountain ikran. She had challenged me to a race, of course, and this time I was not keen on letting her win. Iley and I dip down suddenly, diving down from above the clouds to get back on the path. Tamtey lets out a shout of disbelief at the sight, quickly following in my path. I let out a whoop, rolling through the air on Iley's back as we reach the tips of the floating rocks. I cannot help but let out a deep laugh myself, hearing Tamtey’s curses behind me. She was not used to losing. 

I do one more twist in the breeze before coming to a quick landing on a patch of dewy, plush moss growing thousands of feet in the air. Iley hits the ground with a huff, roaring in delight as I hop off his back. We won.

“Good boy, Iley.” I give him a soft pat on his snout before placing my hands on my hips, face raised to the sky as I watch Tamtey and Nimun fly down to take their places beside me. I can’t help the soft upwards tilt of my lips as Tamtey jumps to the ground, groaning in false annoyance. 

“So’lek! You’re supposed to let me win!” She is practically whining. I roll my eyes upwards, crossing my arms in front of my chest as I take a few small steps towards her. Her own arms mirror my own, crossed. Her tail lashes softly behind her as we come to face one another mere feet apart.

“You will not get better if I keep pretending to lose.” My voice has a lilt to it, one that cannot be misinterpreted for anything other than mirth. Tamtey groans at that, throwing her head back like a pouting child. She steps closer to me, slapping my shoulder lightly. 

“That isn’t the point.” Her eyes are large as she looks up at me, widened into a look of fake innocence. I suck on my teeth, looking back down at her. Her tanhi glows so brightly in the dark, and I can't help but trace their path with my eyes across the entirety of my face. She is still pouting her lip at me. I spoil her so. 

I make a low sound in the back of my throat, urging her to stop. She doesn’t. I can’t help the smile that takes over my face, my upper lip curling from my teeth. Tamtey does nothing but bring me joy. I shake my head at her antics, leaning forward to drop a gentle kiss to the open skin of her forehead that her hair and ornaments do not yet cover. My arms uncross, wrapping around her lithe body and pulling her into a hug. She goes with fake reluctance. 

She softens in my hold, arms circling my neck as she buries her painted face in my chest. She is grumbling something against the cloth that I cannot understand. I raise my brow, attempting to pull her away to get a better listen to her words, yet she doesn’t budge. Instead, Tamtey holds onto me tighter, jumping up to wrap her legs around my waist. I stumble back at the sudden movement, hands falling to hold her under her knees, where they bend at my hips. She is still grumbling, but now I can tell it is all just to tease me. So, I huff and let her keep her legs wrapped around me, walking towards the only small clearing on the floating rock and lowering myself to the cold stone. 

Tamtey’s head had moved to my neck, where she now nibbles at the skin there slightly. I grunt, prying her out from the space she has hidden in. When our gazes meet, I see the hearty smirk sitting so proudly on her face. Not an uncommon sight. 

“Stop acting like a wounded nantang just because you are not faster than Iley and me. After all, we are many years older than you, and much better at most things.” I still have not stopped smiling. Never in all of my years since the battle of Ayram Alusing have I smiled so much. And it was all thanks to this beautiful, tantalizing woman in front of me. The overwhelming feeling of tenderness washed over me, and I had to force my gaze away from her own, looking into the skies around us. 

Tamtey just giggles. Knowing she has won, because next time I will be the loser of the race. 

“Oh… stop acting like you’re ancient, So’lek! We are not that far apart in age, skxawng.” She pushes against my chest playfully, still seated fully on top of my lap. Against my will, my arms tighten around her waist, wrapping her closer to my body. As close as she can get. Up this close, I can see every small detail on her face, from beauty marks to the speckles of green floating in her glowing irises. She is just sitting there, smiling up at me like I am the most important thing in the world. But that cannot be true, because I am not. She is. 

I close the distance between us, hands gripping the smallest part of her waist as my lips find hers. Her long fingers trail up my back, climbing up my neck and onto the sides of my scarred face, cupping my cheeks. We sit there, mouths meshed together, tongues colliding. It was a long kiss, of passion and of love, and I could feel my lungs burning at the lack of air. But, I didn’t pull away, fangs nipping at her bottom lip as she hums into my parted lips. It is so gentle, so full of something that I have never felt before. We are not desperate, just together. It is just So’lek and Tamtey. 

It is Tamtey that pulls off first, taking in a deep breath as she rests her forehead on mine, arms falling from my face back to their spot around my neck atop my shoulders. We sit there, breeze swirling around us, Iley and Nimun’s chirps filling the space from their spots on the rock island below us. I relish in the peace of it all, content to sit there with Tamtey in my lap until the sun comes back over the horizon, even past then. 

But then the silence is interrupted by the sweet echo of Tamtey’s voice, “Can I ask you something?” The question is a hot breath on my neck. My hands move from her waist, rubbing up and down the rough fabric of her vest in what I hope to be a comforting motion. Urging her to go on.

She pulls back, hands falling to her lap as she fiddles with her fingers anxiously. I wait. The patience I have learned as a warrior helps me stay calm as she fidgets endlessly in front of me. Finally, she speaks, her voice quiet, 

“Have you ever thought about mating before? Forming tsaheylu and bonding?”

My hands freeze on her back, halting their circling motions. I pull my arms completely away from her, bringing them behind my back to lean on them as Tamtey takes up space on my lap. I know I must tread carefully here, but I have never been a man who is good with his emotions. 

“Never.” 

That was not the right thing to say. Immediately, I know it, as Tamtey flinches back as if I had struck her. Her brows scrunch, nose crinkling as she stares at me in what I can only assume is disbelief. 

“What do you mean never?” I can hear the insecurity behind her tone, the curiosity that threatens to break free of her mouth and separate into various questions. But my own insecurities have come to the conversation, too. 

“It is exactly as I said. I do not wish to bond. It is not for me, and it never has been.” I know my tone is hard, my words holding a sense of finality I did not mean to fold into them. Tamtey is not close enough to feel how my heart has started racing, my palms beginning to sweat where they are pressed into the ground. I know I should say more. Explain my reasoning. But I do not. 

Not that I would get a chance, for Tamtey has always been one to take action as soon as her heart tells her to. She pulls off of me completely, standing and taking a step away from where I sit on the ground. She hesitates, turning to me briefly before shaking her head and continuing through the small clearing, hopping from the larger mountain to the smaller where Nimun sits waiting for her. 

I try not to scramble to my feet, getting up to follow her as quickly as I can without looking frantic. I hop down after her, my heartbeat in my throat. She is already getting Nimun ready to leave. We were supposed to spend the night out here. Together. 

“Tamtey?” I question. My voice is solid, no hint of concern leaking through. Good. 

She finally turns back to me, and my breath catches in my chest when I notice there are now tears that glisten in her eyes. I cannot move from my spot, watching as she blinks rapidly to will them away. Tamtey rarely cried. My tail flicks behind me, giving away my agitation. But my throat is dry, and I do not speak.

“Then what is all of this, So’lek?” Her voice breaks on my name. I tilt my head, clearly not understanding her question. Instantly, she picks up on the behavior. “You kiss me. Touch me. Speak to me more softly than you speak to anyone else. Yet, you have never thought of bonding–” She pauses, and I can see a lone tear escape, trailing down her cheek.  “What am I to you?” 

My eyes dart around, trying to avoid looking at the distraught look that paints her face. I lick my lips, blurting out the first thing I can think of. 

“I care for you, Tamtey.” 

She scoffs, “Right.” 

My ears twitch back at her tone. She is angry. I made her angry. I know I should reach out to her, stop her from getting on Nimun and flying into the night. I should pull her close and tell her of the thoughts that plague my mind. But I am a weak man, and I do none of those things. Instead, I stay where I am standing and watch as she hastily brushes tears from her blue skin, jumping onto her ikran and slipping away into the depths of night. 

Only when she is out of my sight do I release the breath I am holding. 

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I did not see Tamtey again that night. When I got back to our camp, she was nowhere to be found, somewhere out there in the vastness of Pandora. None of the other Sarentu had seen her either. I knew she was upset with me and likely needed space, so I let it go. I begrudingly ate a meal and forced myself to sleep. 

She was still not back by the next morning. A small kindling of worry began to burn in my gut. I did my best to push it down, going about my daily tasks of gathering and scouting nearby lands. No one spoke over comms, not even Teylan with his usual endless yammering. As night began to creep in on the second day, Tamtey came back to camp. I heard Nimun’s flap of wings from my meditation spot by the shimmering pond that sat shallowly within our rock of solitude. My eyes fluttered open, falling to the ground a few meters below me, where I watched Tamtey meander into the entrance of the cave. I could hear the exclamations of happiness from the other four Sarentu at their reunion. 

I sit there for a few minutes more, mustering up the courage to go down and finally face her. Over a full day without communication was strange for us, and I did not like the way the feeling filled my chest. 

I walked slowly, hopping from patch of moss to patch of moss until I reached the back entrance of the cave. All five of the Sarentu sat on the floor by the fire, chattering. Ever the storytellers. Timidly, I approach the fire, sitting down between Rasi and Teylan like all is normal. They welcome me enthusiastically, questioning me about my day as Rasi passes me a leaf of steamed fish. I take it, picking at it with my fingers to dig out the small bones before bringing it to my mouth to consume. My eyes wander across the fire, where Tamtey sits complementary to me. She is giggling softly at something Nor is telling her, and I am entranced. I just stare, waiting for her to peek at me. 

She must feel my eyes after some time, because she finally meets my gaze. When her cosmic eyes finally meet mine, I see nothing there but hurt. It flashes briefly before she tears away from the eye contact, twisting her body to face Nor completely. Shutting me out. I feel my heart ache a bit in my chest, and I try not to let it show on my face. I turn my head to Teylan, pretending to listen as he rambles on about some type of human computer. But my thoughts are entirely elsewhere. My eyes settled just over Teylan’s shoulder, looking past his face as negative images crossed my mind. I tune him out altogether, eyes blurring. 

What if Tamtey continued to be angry with me? Would she speak to me at all tonight? 

I am drawn from my head as my new clan members get up from around the fire, bidding each other goodnight and heading to their separate hammocks, where they hang all around our home. I stand slowly, staying still as Tamtey and I are the last two left at the fireside. I wait for her to speak first, but it does not come. My heart begins to pound. Tamtey is not one to stay away from confrontation. If she has something on her mind, she will share it. Loudly. 

She glances at me before turning away from me. As she takes a step forward, my hand shoots out, locking around her beaded wrist in a gentle grasp. She does not turn around to face me. 

My voice is quiet as I question her. “Tamtey?” Her ears flicker at the sound of my voice, but still she does not look at me. Instead, she pulls her arm away and continues to walk in another direction, opposite mine. Her silence unsteadies me, and I have to take a deep breath, standing frozen until I will myself to move towards my own hammock. On my way there, my eyes catch Ri’nela’s. Hers are questioning, obviously having seen what just happened between the second youngest Sarentu and me. I do not have an answer for her, looking away and continuing on my path. 

I reach my destination, pulling off my vest and crawling into my hammock. I lay there, staring up at the zig-zagging lines of stone above me. It takes forever for me to fall asleep.

Tamtey does not come to bed that night.

Or the next. Or the one after that.

It has been days, and still she will not speak to me. She won’t even look at me when I am near. She avoids me at all costs, leaving a room when I enter and engaging every other person in conversation while I am near. The other Sarentu notices it. Obviously, they notice it. But Tamtey and I say nothing about the tension that now sits wound tightly between us. 

On the fourth day, the kindling of fire from days prior now burns brightly in my chest, metaphorical smoke flowing into my lungs and steadily suffocating me from the inside out. I recognize the feeling as fear. Something I rarely feel after many years of battle, but not when it comes to her. Always her. 

I am afraid that she is done. With me and my stubborn living. Our conversation is on repeat in my mind like an endless chirping. I said all of the wrong things, and I did not stop her from leaving. And now we do not even speak. 

Before, we spent every moment of every day together. Hunting. Gathering. Cooking. Crafting. Talking. Flying. Everything. We could not get enough of each other. I could not get enough of her. 

She was a light in the darkness. My new reason for living. The air in my lungs. 

I did not like this newfound distance between us. 

On Iley’s back, I am silent. Eyes unseeing as we soar above the clouds. Alone, my thoughts continue to wander. 

I have not touched her skin in days, felt the fullness of her lips in days. Heard her whispers in my ear as we lay wound together in my hammock at night. 

Does she hate me now?

No. Tamtey does not hate. She is too kind. Even after all she has been through, she still sees the good in everyone and everything. She does not hate me, but I am afraid she will begin to resent me if she has not yet begun so already. 

In my memories, I see the depth of the hurt in her eyes, the look of sorrow on her young face as I told her of my undesire to mate. Something I promised myself I did not deserve a long time ago, when I was still a young warrior. 

My words hurt her, spoken words of what sounded like rejection. But it was not. Not really. Not to me. But I couldn’t bring myself to tell her the truth in that moment. I regret it so deeply now. I should have stopped her, brought her close to my body, and lain myself bare before her. Opened my heart and soul to her as any future mate would.

I could not tell her that, although I loved her more than anything in the whole of my life, I could not tie her to me for the rest of our living days. Even if I longed for it so deeply, I saw it in my dreams. However, since I was a young boy, running through the forest with my late friends, I dreamed of the day I would find a beautiful woman to bind myself to. How I used to tell my parents of the woman I dreamed of, strong and charming with a smile like the sun, who I would one day protect and cherish. How I used to daydream about a time when I officially had a mate, the two of us forming tsaheylu and giving ourselves to each other in every possible way. The two of us together, frollicking through my homeland, so in love. One day, that daydream included a new life. 

I shake the thought away, eyes trying to focus back onto something. Anything in the real world. 

I could not tell Tamtey that I still dreamed of these things, both awake and asleep. I dreamed of her waking up beside me for the rest of our lives, sometimes a child in between us. It was something I could not have and something I did not deserve. Not now, not ever. Maybe once, I did. Before I became tainted by the Sky People and their destruction. 

My forehead is scrunched, brows furrowed as I try to rid my brain of these thoughts. It is no use dwelling over it now. I had to think of a way to apologize to Tamtey. Somehow. I would make sure she gets that from me, at least. 

I pat Iley’s side, murmuring at him to take us back down, below the clouds, and back to land. On our way there, a crackle breaks the silence on my comms. It is Teylan. 

“Tamtey! So’lek! I don’t know where you two are, but there is new activity being picked up at one of the old oil processors! Looks like RDA! Can you get there?” 

I listen closely, concern at the back of my mind. It was not unusual for RDA to be stirring up trouble at old sites, but still, it irks me. Neverending. 

Tamtey answers first. “Tell us the location. I’ll be there as soon as possible.”

I wait for a second to see if she will say something else. Speak to me. She doesn’t. I clear my throat, pressing down the comm’s button to reply, “I am on my way now.” He does not get anything back, only Teylan’s confirmation of the processor's name. I fly there quickly, making my way to the outer borders of the processing plant. Upon my landing, I notice that Tamtey is already there. Waiting for me. 

I hop from Iley’s back before he fully touches the ground, springing to stand. I make my way towards Tamtey, where she stands fidgeting at Nimun’s saddle. She looks up at me as I reach her, the first eye contact we have made in days. I no longer see hurt in her eyes, but acceptance. I will away burn in my throat at the sight of it. She grabs her bow from where it is strapped to Nimun’s side, slinging it over her back as she begins to make her way up the small hill we sit on outside the walls of the plant. She speaks to me as she walks away. 

“I didn’t see anyone outside when I was flying in. Must be inside the facility.” 

I make a noise of affirmation, following in her footsteps. Together, we trek up the hill, making our way up and into the overgrowth that covers the destroyed processing plant. I do not try to speak; now is not the time. We move together silently, used to working with each other in these situations. 

In the middle of the facility, a door is wide open, leading into the large metal box. We enter side by side, bows armed and at the ready. Walking in, all of the lights are off, and we are met with nothing but silence. Strange. I radio to Teylan first, calm seeping into my voice. 

“We are here, Teylan. There are no RDA. Is there a level underground where they could be?”

Tamtey glances at me while we stop, waiting for Teylan’s response. We wait for what feels like minutes, avoiding looking at each other directly. 

“Teylan?” I ask, voice harder. There is no reply, but the sound of a door sliding shut and locking fills the room. Behind us, where we came in, the door has sealed. Tamtey is on alert immediately, spinning in her spot, bow raised. Waiting for an attack. I raise my own bow, scouring the empty metal arena in the pitch-black darkness. All I can hear is Tamtey’s breathing next to me. 

No one comes. No shots are sounded. Slowly, the lights begin to flicker on around us, filling the space with fluorescent lights. Tamtey and I finally look at each other, realization settling into our bones. At last, Teylan speaks.

“Okay, so, I’m sorry! This was Ri’nela’s idea! We all know that you two have been uh— avoiding each other. So, I locked you in! Surprise!” 

I groan, lowering my bow and looking away from Tamtey. My breath huffs out of my noise in a loud breath, my annoyance obvious. This is not what was supposed to happen. Besides me, Tamtey is quietly seething. 

“Teylan! Open that door right now.” 

Of course, there is no response. Tamtey growls, slapping her bow over her shoulder as she paces back and forth in her spot. We are quiet, avoiding the inevitable. I watch her, letting her have her moment of anger. It goes on for too long. My usual patience wears thin, and I cannot help but break the uncomfortable silence. 

“Tamtey. Look at me.” She stops pacing at the sound of my voice, turning to me with her arms crossed tightly in front of her. Her brow bone is arched down, creating a look that could be none other than exasperation. Her eyes meet mine, and she throws her arms up, “Ugh! Fine!” 

I watch as she plops onto the ground, flexible legs crossing immediately as she stares at the metal beneath her. I look around like someone was there to save me. I know there is not. I sigh, lowering myself down to mirror her. For a moment, we just stare at each other. I do not know what to say. Neither does she. 

I am silent, thinking of something to say. Anything to express how sorry I am. Not a sound passes my lips. Tamtey beats me to it, voice wavering as she addresses me.

“Okay, let’s talk.” I nod, forcing myself to stay looking at her. Still, I do not speak. It is like my voice is stolen from me, my throat dry, and words unable to be spoken. I just stare at her like a lost boy, hoping she will start the conversation. Luckily, she takes pity on me. 

“Oh, come on. Don’t make me say it.” His eyes narrow, questioning her remark. Say what? She scoffs lightly, but without anger, “I cannot do this anymore, So’lek.” 

Everything around me freezes. The air, Tamtey, my body. It is like everything has been hollowed out around me, leaving nothing but cold behind. 

No.

I lean forward, as close as I can get without intruding on Tamtey’s personal space. I hold my hands out in front of me like I am calming a wild animal. I refuse to notice the tremors as my palms face Tamtey. 

“Please.” I have never heard my own voice so quiet. Vulnerable. Broken. I am desperate, eyes wide and frantic like a feral palulukan. My hands move to my chest, palms flat against my chest as I plead with the woman I know I love. “I will do anything, Tamtey. Do not leave.” She just stares at me, her own eyes wide now, matching my own. She does not look impressed. Maybe…confused? I trip over myself to elaborate.

“I know what I said. I know how it sounded, and I know you must find me w-weak–” I stutter. I never stutter. I take a shaky breath, willing myself forward, “But please, do not leave me. Don’t leave us. I can move my things to another part of the mountain, or stay away for a while…anything. Just ask for it, and it is done. I cannot bear to see you go.” 

She watches me, and I am too lost within my grief to notice that the confusion in her stare has turned into raw concern. I cannot stop myself from speaking even more, words slurring together as I do anything in my power to convince her to stay here. 

“We do not need to be together, as lovers. We can remain apart. Stay friends, or even just clan members. Whatever you want.” I bow my head in submission, making myself vulnerable to her and displaying my anguish. “I will tell the others what I have done. They can help you decide what to do with me after this. I will do anything as long as I can check in at times. To make sure you are okay. That is all I ask of you. Please.”

I cannot bring myself to lift my head up again, instead I bend in half fully, pressing my forehead to the ground beneath us. Disgusting human metal, cold and hard, meets my skin in an uncomfortable bond. Tamtey doesn’t speak. I am not even sure if she was listening to me. I know I have hurt her, and I do not expect forgiveness; I just want to know my new family will be okay no matter what happens between the two of us. I care too much for her to go, or for any of them to leave alongside her. I keep my head on the floor, waiting for her judgment. After a moment, I feel the soft touch of her hands on the nakedness of my shoulders. She presses up on them, trying to lift my body up into a sitting position once more. 

I do not let her. I stay where I am, desolate. 

“So’lek– So’lek, get up. Come on, look at me.” I can hear the worry in her voice, and it just makes me feel even worse, guilt threatening to escape the cavity of my stomach and into my throat to form a spew of apologies. “So’lek, get up.” She sounds solemn. Fear tingles down my limbs and into the tips of my fingers. She has made her decision. 

Slowly, I rise. Sitting up to face her, hands clenched in hard fists within the knot of my lap, I prepare for the worst. I do not want to lose her. Not after I just got her. She is just staring at me with something in her eyes, not pity, but something more complicated. Distress mixed with something like love. But no, that cannot be right. Not now. Not ever. 

“I’m not going anywhere.” Her words let me finally breathe a sigh of relief, body relaxing and eyes closing briefly to regain some sort of clarity. 

“Thank you, Tamtey.” My eyes open again to find her frowning.

“You do not need to thank me, So’lek. I was never going to leave. Never.” She pauses, hand hesitant as she reaches for one of my clenched fists. I let her take it, which she does so gently. So caring. And all I can do is watch as she attempts to rub out the knots that are my fingers. I look at her, waiting for any type of elaboration. I must know my fate. 

“Then, what shall I do? How can I make this better?” My words are whispered, leaking remnants of regret. She sighs, and suddenly she sounds overwhelmed with sorrow. I gulp at the sight of her looking so forlorn. Her hand clenches around mine, her long fingers lacing with my calloused ones. 

“So’lek, you misunderstand me. You do not have to do anything or go anywhere. We are Sarentu, and the Sarentu stay together. No matter what.” She attempts a smile, but only a small downward quirk of her lips peeks through. “You cannot change your feelings, So’lek. I should not have avoided you. I was just hurt a-and upset. That you don’t want me…the way I want you.”

I wrench back like I was struck, body startling and arm ripping from her grasp. 

“What?” My voice is rough, wet with emotion that I can no longer contain. I am breathing heavy, the beginnings of panic racing throughout the length of my taut body. I shake my head frantically side to side in denial. My next words are loud, final. 

“Do not say I do not want you, Tamtey.”

Tears glisten in my eyes, welling up at the innermost parts of my eyes. Tamtey blurs in my vision, but still I continue. 

“I love you. More than anything I have ever known.” I know that now is the time to let it all out, to tell her of everything I have been thinking. To show her the real So’lek. 

She is watching me with matching tears in her eyes, fingers locked together to prevent herself from reaching out to me. Knowing I have her attention, I go on. I tear open my chest and let Tamtey see its contents. My heart. 

“You are the first thing I think of when I awake. The first thing I think of before closing my eyes for sleep. I find myself aching for your presence and your touch. At all times of the day. I reach for you even when you are not there–” I suck in a breath so I can continue my speech of devotion. “I think of you even in my sleep. I dream of you. Of us.” My voice cracks on the latter word. I know I must keep going, or else I will stop. She has to know it all. My throat is tight, and my words are warbled from the tears I choke on. 

“I see you, and I see myself, years into the future, with wrinkles on our skin and children at our feet. I see myself sitting by the fire, too old to be a warrior, with you by my side, braiding new beads into my hair as you sing your Sarentu song. We live the rest of our days together.” I reach out to her, arms resting on her knees. “I dream of dying in your arms.” She is sobbing now, breaths broken and coming out in sharp gasps. I force myself to go even further for her. 

“But I cannot have this, ma yawne. I do not deserve this life. This future that so many of my people will never get to have. You are my entire life, but you are young, and you cannot tie yourself to me forever. Not like this. You will find someone who is stronger, faster, and pure. Not like me. I am polluted by hatred, and I forever will be.” 

Tamtey bawls, and I have no time to react as she jumps into my arms, wrapping herself around me in a tight embrace. I grasp onto her, and after being deprived of her for so many days, I am crazed. I run my hands along her back, squeezing her anywhere I can get my hands on. I rock her back and forth, and we are both crying so loudly. I cannot remember a time when I cried this much, not even when I found my people massacred before me. Or when Mamante died behind me. At this moment, I am glad no one is around, even if it means we are stuck in this horrible place until Teylan releases us. 

“Oh, So’lek.” In her usual Tamtey fashion, as soon as she pulls back, she is smacking me lightly on the chest. Chastizing. “Why couldn’t you just say all of that before? And here I was, ignoring you for days like a petulant child.” I sniff, reaching up to wipe the lines of tears from her rounded cheeks. Even now, she looks magnificent. 

“Do not cry, ma Tamtey. Not for me.” She lets out a sound of distress, hands trailing up my arms and onto my face. She holds me, cradling me like something delicate.

“You deserve all of that, So’lek, and you deserve to be happy. Your clan would want that for you, especially after all you have done for them.” She sounds so certain, and I open my mouth to immediately disagree with her. But she cuts me off, voice tender and warm. “You do. You are allowed to live a long life, filled with love. We can have that together. You and me. The rest of the Sarentu. Let yourself have this, Ma So’lek.”

My hands cover hers where they fall across my cheekbones, and I take in a long breath. I center myself, thinking of what to say next. But I do not know what to say. Can that be true? Knowing all that I have done and continue to do. Do I deserve to settle one day and live in peace at last? I am a murderer, through and through. I will never escape that. But Tamtey stares at me so lovingly, so earnestly. I see truth in her eyes, and I want nothing more than to believe her. To trust her with myself completely. 

“Do not continue to carry your burdens alone, So’lek. I am here now– so share them with me. I am here with you, forever. As your mate.” My eyes clench shut at the word, blinking out the remaining tears leftover in my yellow eyes. I can feel the throb in my head forming due to all of this crying. My mate. She wants to be my mate. It sounds so sure coming from her mouth, and I know that I will never long for anything more than I long to call her mine. 

“I want that ma Tamtey. I want you.” 

She finally smiles at me, teeth meeting air as her eyes gather at the sides. She is light personified. She leans in, kissing me gingerly on the forehead. I feel so precious in this moment. Loved. 

“Bond with me, Tamtey. It would be the greatest honor of my life.” Tamtey giggles at the words, but I have never been so serious. She explores the depths of my irises, searching for any sign of hesitation. I know she finds none. 

“Okay, ma yawne, okay.” She looks around us, remembering that we are still locked within the suffocating walls of human invention. “But not here,” she adds. 

“Yes.” I nod in agreement, tilting my chin to allow my lips to meet hers. We kiss without heat, only pure adoration. I savor the moment, adding it to the pocket of Tamtey in my mind. She pulls away first, hands going to her neck to contact Teylan. 

“Teylan, let us out. We talked.” She is vague, but I can hear the lilt of playfulness in it. Ah, so she will be keeping this a secret. What a nice surprise it will be for the other members of our clan.

The young boy’s response is almost immediate: “Are you telling me the truth?” He sounds so hopeful, and So’lek cannot help the endearing chuckle that leaves his lips at the sound of it. 

“She tells the truth, Teylan. We are better. Now open that door before I find another way out of here.” I hear a squeak on the other end of the line, before the familiar sound of heavy machinery makes its way throughout the room. The door behind us slides open with a beep, filtering natural light into the room. Together, Tamtey and I stand with our hands grasped together. We walk outside in silence, soaking in each other's company. 

As we get back to our ikran, I feel nothing but peace in my chest. All traces of anxiety and insecurity are gone. I snatch a treat for Iley out of my travel pack, rewarding him for waiting so patiently. It is nearly night now, Tamtey, and I must have been inside for quite a long time. I relish in the colorful radiance of the eclipse, turning to Tamtey. 

“I know of a spot for us. I will race you there.” She looks back at me, amused shock on her delicate features. She parts her lips, response on the tip of her tongue. But I do not give her the chance. Instead, I hop onto Iley, launching into the air. I cannot help but laugh as I hear the expletives fall from Tamtey’s mouth while she chases after me. 

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We make it there in minutes, my impatience spurring me to pick a spot close by. It is within a deep cave system, surrounded by thick bundles of moss, vines, and various other flora. Surrounded by Eywa’s creations. 

We land at the opening where I jump before Iley even hits the ground, walking to Tamtey to offer her my hand in helping her off of Nimun’s back. She takes it, giggling. Together we walk to the cavern entrance, slowly and relishing in eachothers presence. 

I lead her down the spiralling tunnel that is glowing with bioluminescence, plush leaves, and mushrooms decorating the walls and ground. We hop through it gracefully, pushing and pulling at one another like children playing in the forest. At some point, she races ahead of me, jumping across a large gap and running ahead. I huff as I watch her run away from me, laughing. I jump after her, chasing with my own laughter stuck in my chest. Tamtey is fast, but my legs are longer. I reach her in seconds, pulling at the length of her tail to stop her in her tracks. She turns, hissing playfully at me. I hiss back, following her deeper into the caves. 

Finally, we reach an opening at the bottom. We stop first to take in the beauty around us. It is dark, but aglow with small specs of colored light, radiating from cave roots and kurslärwll. It is an enchanting sanctuary away from the eyes of others, and all ours for the night. It is perfect. 

Tamtey and I circle each other like predators preparing for a fight for dominance. Our tails lash behind us, teeth bared in snarls as we assess each other. I am crouched, prowling across the ground like a hunter waiting to strike. Across from me, Tamtey matches my actions, knees bent and fingers pressing on the moss below us as she comes to a stop. I stop as well, we both stay still on our feet, legs stretched and hearts racing. My snarl dies off, folding into a wide grin as I watch the woman I love. She crawls towards me, patches of bioluminescence illuminating her small steps and etching them into a short path. I sit down fully, tail thumping against the ground as Tamtey halts a head's width in front of me. From this position, she is taller than I am. I cannot help but smirk up at her, my ears flicking back in amusement.

Her large eyes narrow at me, assessing. I do not flinch back. Instead, I continue to stare at her, smiling smugly. Then there’s a brief flash of a smirk over her own face. I do not back down, continuing to sit comfortably before her. She watches me for a moment more, then takes one more long stride forward, crossing into my lap. She sits herself on my lap, rump landing in the space between my crossed legs, her long striped thighs wrapping around my waist. My arms come up to hold her at the slimness of her waist. She is propped up high, and I look up at her in wonder as she stares back down at me over the tip of her nose. I am still grinning like a lovesick fool, but I cannot stop.

 I find that I do not want to stop. After so many years, I want to be happy. With her.

She is everything, and I do not want to look away. She fills my entire being, like the blood that flows through my veins. I could remain nourished forever by just the sight of her. Tamtey hums low in her throat above me, bending at the neck to place a soft peck on my lips. I can feel her smile in it. We kiss softly for a few seconds, only pulling back so our noses can rub together in light motions. 

“This is what you have decided? There is no going back from this, ma Tamtey.”  She just rolls her eyes at me, growling under her breath.

“I know what I want, So’lek.” 

Her eyes flutter as my hands rub up and down the strip of bare skin between her loincloth and her chest guard. 

“What do you want?” The lowness of my voice rolls off my tongue, quiet in the little space left between us. 

Her response is deliberate, “You.”

At that, we no longer hesitate. Our mouths are on each other in a second, lips smacking and tongues clashing. She groans into my mouth as my hands pull her further down to brush against my crotch. It is an invitation. One she eagerly accepts. 

Tamtey and I have not done much more than kiss before this moment. Our intimate relationship had not progressed further than light touches and what Tamtey calls ‘making out’. It is not that we do not want to. I want it more than anything to be close to her. But, Tamtey is so special to me, and I wanted–want–everything to be perfect.

Her hips roll against my own, pushing against me with little force. The position does not allow our middles to touch completely, so I take it upon myself to shift us slightly. I move her by the grip I have on her waist, lifting her up as I uncross my legs beneath her. They unfurl, widening to let Tamtey’s body closer. I put her back down, my own hips rutting upward to meet her wider ones. We move against each other, drinking in each other's gasps. My hands move away from her waist, trailing down to the roundness of her rear. My fingers grasp onto fatty flesh, massaging in a way that has Tamtey moaning in delight. I moan back, using the new grip to pull her against me harder. 

I can hardly breathe, chest rising and falling rapidly. I curse, forcing myself to pull back from her. My hands fly to her face, tracing down the lines of her cheekbones as she sucks in air. 

“Why’d you stop?” A human word. My lip turns up in amusement at both her impatience and her slip into sky people tongue. She is so perfect. 

I tsk at her with my tongue, urging her to sit back a bit. I hold her at arm's length, biting my lip as my eyes track down the lines of her body. They catch at the intricacies of her chest guard, the way the colors and materials weave together in a perfect blend of different clans' designs. I want it off of her. 

My fingers inch their way to the fabric, gripping it. My eyes lock onto hers. 

“Can I take this off?” 

She smiles. Blushes. Purple glows faintly beneath her skin. A nod. I take a breath, fingers untying the ties that keep the chest guard closed around her. Slowly, it unravels, and I can finally peel the piece away from her skin. I am cautious, but I am sure the hunger in my eyes is clear. On an exhale, it is removed. I toss it unceremoniously across the small clearing, eyes locked onto her neck. I swallow and finally let my gaze travel down to her newly bared chest. 

Tamtey has always been modest. A trait I am sure the humans beat into her head. But now, I finally see all of her. 

Her breasts are small, like all Na’vi women, but they have a roundness that my mouth waters at. They sit perked up, nipples pebbled in the air. 

My hands are on her in a blink, sliding down her collarbones to find the swells on her chest. My fingers bend, cupping her breasts. I let them feel and squeeze the soft skin there. I am enchanted. I give Tamtey no warning as my mouth finds one of her nipples. I suck and bite at the textured skin, groaning at the feel of her in my mouth. The breast I do not lick at is prodded at by my fingers, thumb brushing back and forth on the hardened nub in slow, deep motions. 

I am a man starved, lapping at her breasts like a hungry beast. I am overcome with desire, switching between the two of them like a crazed man. She is moaning above me, hands weaving in between the strands of my black hair, pulling lightly as I suck greedily at her tits. I pull at the skin of her breasts with my fangs, leaving purple bruises behind as I lick across her sternum. She pulls at my hair roughly, forcing my head back. I look up from where I am bent, lips swollen as my eyes meet hers. She is flushed, lips glossy from biting them. 

“Lay back.” My words are strained, throat tight with arousal. Tamtey moves back, lowering to her elbows so she can still watch me. From there, I pull back, removing my thighs from where they still lie beneath her own. I get to my knees, grabbing her knees where they now sit bent. I ease her legs down to the floor, hands moving to untie her loincloth. I am quicker with this than I was with her chest guard. Now I am impatient, aching for her. 

It comes off far easier and quickly gets thrown somewhere near her abandoned chest piece. 

My large hands latch onto her muscular thighs, wrenching them apart as her core now lies bare to me. Suddenly, I am on my stomach, nose buried into her mound. I take in a large breath, taking in her scent. It is heady and thick. Mouth-watering.

Then my mouth is on her, tongue lapping between the wetness I find between her folds. It is unlike anything I have ever tasted. I moan into her, the curve of my tongue dipping inside for an even deeper taste. She is a mess above me, thighs flinching, trying to close in on me. My hands keep her spread as I continue to pleasure her. 

I keep switching between circling her nub with my tongue and suckling on it roughly. I am messy, my face wet with her juices. But  I do not stop. My jaw is tired, but I persist until I hear her moans quicken above me. They come at shorter intervals, increasing in pitch and volume. I focus all of my attention on her clit, biting softly at the hood. That pushes her over the edge.

She comes with my name on her lips. 

I lick her through it, slurping up her release and guiding her even further over the edge. She whimpers above me, gently tugging on my hair. I finally come up for air, the back of my hand meeting my lips to wipe off the glisten I know is there. Tamtey’s chest is rising and falling rapidly as she tries to catch her breath, her mouth open and eyes clenched closed. My own widened in awe at the sight of her so taken apart. I had never done such a thing to a female before. I like my lips, the taste of her still lingering on my skin. 

I quite like it. 

My hands rub soothing circles into her thighs as she comes down from her high. I sit still on my knees, urging my hips to stay down as I throb beneath my loincloth. I yearn to take it off. 

Tamtey opens her eyes, settling her gaze on my own once again. We stare at each other with love in our eyes, threatening to jump out of our eyesockets. One of her hands crawls up my arm, pulling on it to bring me closer to her. I follow without hesitation, going to her like a reyknap to a flame. Her breathing has returned to normal, and the thundering of her heart in her chest has quietened to a softer sound akin to that of pattering drums. I can feel it where our chests meet. Then, her nimble fingers crawl around my front, then my side, and finally down my back. They linger there, tracing mindless patterns. We stare into each other's eyes, the cold skin on my back tingling as I feel her hand cautiously find my braid. My breath hitches, eyes flickering to her arm as she brings my kuru up and between our chests. I watch as she nudges aside the hair to get to the tendrils of my kuru. Carefully, she touches the tips of the tendrils, letting them curl around her pointer finger. My tongue darts out to wet my lips; I can feel them starting to quiver. 

Tamtey smirks up at me, playing with the little tendrils until I shudder above her. 

“Tamtey.” My voice is firm. Pleading for her to stop teasing me. She listens, pulling her finger back but keeping my kuru held in her other hand. I am a wreck, motionless as I watch her bring her own kuru to mine. She stops, looking at me. All I can do is nod. 

At last, our kurus meet, tendrils threading together into one sturdy bond. Tsaheylu is made, and Tamtey and I both pant at the utter passion that floods our systems. My pupils fatten at the emotion that runs through me. 

I see it all. Everything Tamtey has ever done and has ever been. Everything that she wants to be. I see her mother, Kataru. Her being ripped away by the RDA and taken to TAP.  Aha’ri getting murdered in front of her. Tamtey’s screams. The cries.

I flinch at the memory of the sound. 

I see Tamtey being beaten by Mercer’s thugs for standing up for Teylan. Over and over again. Her being starved. Her growing up feeling like she was nothing. Nothing but an alien. Foreign. 

I see the day she is put to sleep, the day she sees me. Her first meeting with a true Na’vi. I watch as she grows into a mighty warrior, a noble Sarentu, and an admirable Na’vi. I see all of the pain and worry. I see her love for me, blooming from where it was burrowed in her heart, out into the open for me to see. I feel her in this moment. The desire, the trust, and the tenderness she holds for me in her boundless heart. 

In return, I open myself wholly to her. I show her my life and how I have become the man I am today. All of my pain and my suffering. Losing everyone I have ever loved. Wawen. Mamante. The list goes on. I show her my days alone, spanning into years. The guilt I felt at being one of the last of my clan. The guilt I still continue to feel. I show her all of my triumphs and all of my failures, too. Bonding with Iley, and overcoming a fear I still try my best to hide. I show her my journey. My fear. Finding the resistance and my path to becoming the Dog Tag Warrior. The path of a warrior-turned-murderer. 

Finally, I show her herself. Me, finding Tamtey. Looking upon her face for the first time, and believing there could still be something to live for. 

Mentoring her.

Getting to know her. 

Becoming her friend. 

Falling deeper in love with her after each passing of eclipse. The joy I feel just by seeing her smile. The overwhelming devotion I have for her. This moment.

I let her feel my attraction to her. My nerves. I let her feel the fear that I have of somehow disappointing her. Hurting her.

I want her to be mine, until we return ourselves to Eywa. 

Our bond fortifies, kurus wrapped so closely together they look like one. Tamtey’s eyes are wet with tears, and I can feel that mine are the same. She lets her hands fall to my waist, hastily removing my loincloth and kicking it away, all without looking. They wander up to my shoulders, clasping the muscle there. 

“Take me.” 

It is whispered, yet I swear it echoes in the cavern around us. The sound resonates in the depths of my ears. It reaches my gut, thick and all-encompassing. 

I growl low in my throat, hitching her thighs up and over my hips to latch behind my waist. I am hard, my shaft standing tall in the air. One of my hands moves from Tamtey’s legs, grabbing myself in my hand and bringing it towards her entrance. It is so wet, sticky with her previous release. I run the head of my cock over her folds, testing the waters. She moans lightly above me. 

Even with no experience, my body knows what to do. Instinctively, I push the head in, waiting for any sign of pain from my beloved. All I get in response is a gasp. Her walls clench around my tip, urging it to go in deeper. I oblige, sliding fully inside her in one thrust. We both moan, mine deep and hers high as the skin of my hips meets her ass. She is mewling beneath me, my hands finding her waist to squeeze in comfort as I force my hips to calm. Ma Eywa, she feels so tight around me. So hot and soaked through. 

“More!” She moans at me. It takes nothing for me to begin to thrust in and out of her sex. At first, I am slow, gauging her reaction. But, as her moans only grow louder, I get faster. I pump in and out of her, shifting my hips to try and find new angles. I let out an unrestrained whimper, overcome with sensitivity. I let nature guide me. 

My hands move Tamtey’s body on their own free will, hiking her legs from around my waist to up and over my shoulders. She is bent in half, knees to her chest, as I slam into her with renewed vigor. The angle is somehow even better than before. I am deeper this way, and pushing into Tamtey at such an angle that she becomes a withering mess. 

I groan out her name, “Tamtey.” She sobs at the sound of my voice. “Come on, sweet girl, come on.” 

My hips are relentless in their pace, pounding into Tamtey like they were made to do so. One of my hands edges between our bodies, fingers finding her swollen mound with ease. I find her clit, still fat and slick with her wetness. I rub at her with my fingers, circling her most sensitive spot in quick movements as I tilt my hips up just an inch more. She cries out above me.

“Ah–So’lek!” She is whining, words trailing off into incoherent mumbles as I thrust. Only a few more pumps of my hips, and she is pliant in my arms, screaming out my name as she comes. Her walls tighten even more around me, squeezing out my own release. I come with a whine, moans trembling out past my lips as I spurt continuously inside of her. My hips do not stop until every drop is gone. Slowly, I stop, holding myself still within her. Gloved in her warmth. 

My chest shudders, my heart pounding in my chest as I try to regain some sort of clarity. I look down at my mate. My mate. She is even more beautiful beneath me. Her skin is glistening with sweat, her tanhi sparkling in the low light of the caves. Her eyes are fluttering, legs still twitching with aftershocks. I massage them, settling her. 

Together, our breaths lighten and our chests steady. Our bond still holds strong, kurus entangled like vines on a tree. My hands slide from her legs to her face, cupping her cheeks. I lean down, pressing gentle kisses across her face. Her eyelids, her nose, her forehead and her lips. Over and over again. I am smiling wider than I ever have. I pull back.

“I see you, ma muntxate.” She giggles at the name, hands moving to rub against the bareness of my chest. She caresses me, intimately, but not sexually. I feel so soft beneath her hands. 

“I see you, ma muntxatan.” Her reply is like a song, and I cannot help but to fall gently on top of her, wrapping myself around her as I do my best to stay sheathed within her. I burrow into her neck, lips resting on the flushed skin. I whisper words of longing to her. Words of promise and devotion. 

We are mated before Eywa. 

It is the one thing I have selfishly wanted for my entire life, and now I have it. Tamtey has allowed me to have it.

Here in my arms. For the rest of our lives. 

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His breaths come in deep shudders, chest rising and falling as he gasps for air. Wukula had really gotten him this time. So’lek’s ribs ached, and all he could do was stare up at the dark sky above him. Raindrops fall from the curling depths of the clouds, splattering lightly against his face and arms. But So’lek doesn’t feel it. All he feels is pain–and misery. 

Is Tamtey alright? He had left her so quickly, eager to get rid of the threat to his new family. Now he feels a twinge of regret. What if leaving her had damned her? Is she awake? Breathing? She had been heavily injured, covered in open wounds and dried blood that made So’lek hold back gags. It had been obvious she had been through a lot while captured, but So’lek had tried to clear his mind of it. He had carried her, Tamtey’s limp body light in his hands and her head lolling against his shoulder. Now he hopes that the others have found her, taken her somewhere safe. To heal her and help her. He expects nothing for himself in this moment, darkness seeping into his vision. In this moment, he feels only sorrow, aching to see Tamtey again before he closes his eyes. But he is losing the battle–eyes are growing heavier, and the world spins above him. Darkness seeps in, starting from the corner of his vision until it finally crowds to cover his pupils. For a second, he knows only darkness, submerged in a world of black. He fights for just a moment longer, desperate. But he fails, and the last thing he thinks about before he succumbs to the abyss is the luminosity of Tamtey’s eyes. 

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The first thing he sees is the flickering of lantern fire splashing against grey sheets of smooth rock. His eyes barely open, eyelids flitting to cover his yellow eyes as they meet harsh light for the first time. So’lek takes in a quick breath, urging his eyes to open fully. He squints, forcing his pupils to focus on his surroundings. He comes back to himself slowly, taking in the current state of his long body. He feels the ache in his chest, the burning of lacerations in the process of healing strewn across his arms and legs. His back is sore where it is propped up against upholstered cushions stuffed full of zakru hair, but even with the softness beneath him, he is positive that he is covered in a smattering of bruises from the way even the slightest shift of the fabric on skin makes him grit his teeth. He takes one more sweep of the room from where he lies on the ground, finding nothing but the familiar walls of his solitude. He is dazed, comforted to know he is home–he snuggles in deeper into the cushion despite his pain, tongue brushing over his fangs beneath his lips. He allows himself to rest, eyes closing–then the reality of his situation settles in. 

His eyes fly up, heart beginning to pound as he struggles to sit up. The bandages across his skin pull at the scabbing wounds as his muscles strain, but he does not stop. He manages to sit upright, breaths coming in shallow and rapid. He groans, clenching his abdomen, but still tries to push off the ground. 

Where is Tamtey? 

For a moment, he is delirious, pawing at the hard ground beneath him for any sense of support. He fails miserably. He throws out cusses, swearing into the air around him and growling in frustration–he is seconds away from screaming out when bodies begin to surround him, voices intelligible as they urgently encourage him to lie back down. So’lek refuses, jerking back when hands push against his shoulders–he hisses loudly, teeth bared and eyes focusing on the people in front of him. The soft eyes of the Aranahe tsahik find his, naked brows burrowed in concern. To her left is Rasi, wrinkled hands pulling the younger woman when she sees So’lek’s distress. 

“So’lek, please calm down,” scolds Etuwa, desperate to make the older man listen. So’lek’s eyes flicker between the two women, tail slashing in wide arcs behind him. Slowly, he complies, allowing himself to slow his heart and breathing–but he does not lie back down. 

“What happened? Where is Tamtey?” His voice is strained, words breaking between small gasps for air. Definitely broken ribs. He doesn’t dwell on it. Rasi and Etuwa just watch him, still trying to persuade him to lie down. It only angers him more. 

“Stop! Where is Tamtey?” He has never raised his voice at them before; he rarely does at anyone. Even he can hear the anguish in his expression. It is so desperate that he is certain the women hear it; there is nothing to hide it. The love. He doesn’t even attempt to tame it. Let the whole moon know. 

“So’lek, you need to calm yourself. We will tell you everything, but you must rest,’ says Rasi, her wisened voice soothing. So’lek rolls his eyes, impatient. He does not want to rest, he wants–no, needs to know if Tamtey is okay, “I am calm. Please speak.” Etuwa sighs, throwing her hands out in exasperation, “You are still so difficult even after all of these years!” So’lek doesn’t respond, looking up at her, disgruntled and aching. Etuwa drops to her knees in front of him on the floor, Rasi following slower. They share one glance, Rasi nodding for Etuwa to continue. 

“You have been unconscious for days. Only a few, but you are very hurt and dehydrated. You are stubborn even in your sleep; no water would move past your lips.” So’lek huffs, impatient, “I know that I am injured, you do not have to tell me. Just tell me about Tamtey.” Etuwa sends up a quick prayer to Eywa for her to find patience when dealing with this insufferable man, “We found both of you at the remnants of Hometree–well, the Sarentu found you. You were next to Wukula, and Teylan helped get you back. Ri’nela and Rasi found Tamtey just outside of the metal walls.” They were still avoiding telling him about Tamtey’s current state. Something must be terribly wrong, but he doesn’t voice his opinion, fervent to hear what else they have to say. Etuwa takes a deep breath, voice catching in her throat. The young tsahik looks to Rasi for help. 

Oh no.

“Tamtey is sleeping.” That is all the elder gives him. So’lek’s eyes narrow, “And what else?” Rasi sighs, a hand coming out to rest on So’lek’s bandaged arm.

“Are you sure you want to know this, So’lek?” The man flinches back, golden eyes searching Rasi’s own. She must see his misery, giving into his desires as she speaks again, “Tamtey was heavily injured. More than you. The explosion at Hometree surely did not help her wounds,” she pauses, licking her lips, “But that is not the worst of it. They did things to her–the RDA and…the Mangwkan. We cannot ask her since she has not woken up, but it is clear that they have tortured her.” So’lek doesn’t let Rasi get out another word, moving both of his hands behind him to push himself up onto his knees. The two women frantically try to push him back down, but he is having none of it. Even in his weakened state, he is stronger than the two of them. He growls at them lowly, “Let me see her!” His voice is rough, mangled. Rasi and Etuwa finally give in; So’lek knows he is a sorry sight. The two women lift him together, one arm under each of his shoulders. Lifting his arms to rest on theirs hurts terribly, but he doesn’t dare to make a noise, stumbling along. 

They help him up the small ledges to reach the area where his large map hangs on the wall. Just below it lies Tamtey, unconscious. At the sight of her, So’lek’s legs seem to give out, knees buckling to the ground at her side. Rasi and Etuwa let him fall. He sees no one else, not even noticing Ri’nela and Teylan on the other side of Tamtey. His breath is shaky as he inhales, hands hovering over the Sarentu’s supine form, never touching. He takes in Tamtey’s body, wrapped in more bandages and salve than his, the arm on the other side of him attached to a line leading into a bag of fluids. The humans had to intervene then. Her head has a healing gash on it,  a large scab, purple and swollen, where it rests above her right eye. His eyes trail lower to find layers of cloth wrapping around her chest, some spots dark with blood. He swallows as he searches her extremities. There, he sees multiple marks: burns, cuts, and bruises. They are like a new pattern on the light blue of her skin. Only her wrists are wrapped, likely injured from being in metal cuffs. The only thing they had left on her was her loincloth, torn at the edges and filled with holes from licks of fire. He can see everything, and he has never felt so scared. Slowly, So’lek lets one hand fall to the curve of Tamtey’s left cheek, rubbing his thumb over her Sarentu mark in absentminded circles. Feeling her. 

“Has she not awoken?” He sounds wrecked– so far gone for this woman, he cannot even begin to comprehend what he would do if he lost her. 

“No, ma So’lek,” states Ri’nela, voice barely above a whisper. She’s crouched on the other side of Tamtey, staring at him. He sees it from the corner of his eye, but he cannot look away from Tamtey.

“It is bad then?” 

There is silence at his words, and that alone is all the confirmation he needs, “I want to stay here. Next to her. I will rest, but it will be at her side.” He is firm. Final. He is not going to play petty games or argue back and forth, because Tamtey had to be in his line of sight at all times. In case she–when she wakes up. Ri’nela purses her lips, torn, “So’lek, I do not think that is a good–,” he cuts her off, “I do not care what you think. I am not moving.” It was barked. Snappish. He only takes a moment to feel guilty, just because Ri’nela is always so kind. But he can never control himself when it comes to Tamtey. Ri’nela does not even flinch, expecting him to lash out; she has seen the differences in treatment of Tamtey compared to the other Sarentu since the start. She cannot blame him for doing so. So, she nods, “Okay, So’lek. Okay.” Ri’nela stands, motioning for the others to follow her away from the two Na’vi on the ground, making the excuse of grabbing more supplies for So’lek’s reopened wounds. But really, she knows he needs a moment alone. 

Once they are out of sight, So’lek falls to the side from his spot on his knees, crumbling into a fetal position. From here, he can still see the gentle rise and fall of Tamtey’s wrapped chest. Seeing the evidence of her breathing allows him to finally fall into the chasm of sleep once more.

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A few more days pass. So’lek does not leave her side, to the others' chagrin. He flitters around her, unwary of his own injuries, to check her bandages, put salves on her healing bruises and burns, and force water down her throat. The feeling of trepidation has not left his throat since he last woke up. According to the others, Tamtey has been asleep for a week. She has barely roused; the only movement they have seen from her has been beneath her eyelids. She is still there, yet So’lek’s worries only deepen. He hates seeing her like this: weak, sick, and vulnerable. It reminds him of his shortcomings. His failure to protect her. He had let them take her away and allowed them to torture her for days—he had not been fast enough. These thoughts plague his mind as he gently rewraps one of Tamtey’s angular wrists, making sure not to tighten them too much. He did not want her to be in any more pain.

Outside, it is dark, eclipse having long passed, and the others have long since gone to sleep for the night. They had quickly stopped pestering him to leave Tamtey’s side once they saw his determination. 

He ties off the edge of the bandage, tucking in its little tail. He settles back, butt falling into the pit of his knees. 

He lets his chin fall to his chest, eyes blinking closed. Quietly, under his breath,  he mutters a long prayer to Eywa. 

Please, Great Mother, let Tamtey rise from this. She is a warrior. And a leader. She is true of heart and fights not just for her people, but all of The People. She is the most deserving of life and living. She has had so much taken from her. Please do not take her from me. I cannot lose anyone else. 

He finishes, choosing to reflect. He sits in silence, taking in all of the sounds of the night. The crickets of insects, the quiet grumbles of the ikran outside, the small puffs of Tamtey’s breath. 

In and out. In and out. 

It hitches.

His ears flick back, honing in on the pattern of her breathing. It has returned to normal, but then a slight whimper breaks the silence. His eyes fly open, and he rocks forward, hovering over Tamtey. Her face is screwed up, eyes clenching, and lips puckering into a grimace. She is waking up. So’lek’s hands find her cheeks, centering her head as he moves his face over hers. He wanted to see her eyes so badly.

Please.

He waits, holding his breath. Then, slowly, Tamtey’s eyes bat open, long eyelashes brushing against the hollowed bags of her eyes. He feels a lump begin to form in his throat. His eyes meet hers, the vibrant mixture of colors in her irises so wide and encompassing. Slowly, her gaze focuses, finding him. She breathes out a quivering, “So’lek?” He cannot speak; his throat has seemingly sealed shut. He is not even sure if he is awake. He just swallows, nodding at her. She still looks confused, eyebrows furrowing, and one of her arms reaching up, shaking from the effort as she tries to reach him. He meets her halfway, one of his hands leaving her face to grab her fingers, bringing them to rest on her chest. At his touch, she seems to break, “So’lek.” Then tears are welling in her eyes, and she is suddenly sobbing beneath him. He panics, eyes widening, hands back on her cheeks, “Tamtey? Tamtey, it is alright.” She just stares up at him, her eyes filling with more tears as they continue to fall down the azure skin of her face. He cups her neck, letting his thumbs find the curve of her rounded jaw. He swipes his thumbs across her skin where they lie, “Tam tam, ma Tamtey.” He keeps the calloused pads of her fingers where he can feel her heart beat in her throat. 

Tamtey sniffles, sobs beginning to quiet, “Help me up, please.” Her voice is croaky. So’lek jumps into action, finding a nearby cup of water and bringing it to her, tilting her head and neck up enough for her to swallow the liquid. He tries to make her drink more, but she weakly bats his hands away, urging him to help her. And of course, he obliges, moving her to sit up and letting her lean against his side for support. They sit together, Tamtey taking a second to catch her breath from the struggle of moving on her own after so long. His hands don’t leave her body, one arm wrapped around her waist, the other resting in his lap, ready for action.

“I thought I was dead.” Tamtey’s words are soft, barely loud enough to be heard. But, So’lek does. He clenches his jaw, feeling the familiar stretch of scarred skin on his left cheek, “Luckily, you are not.” That earns him a chuckle, followed by a coughing fit that wracks Tamtey’s weakened body. He holds her sturdily, rubbing her back and feeding her water. As he goes to bring the water cup away, Tamtey’s hand wraps around his thickly boned wrist. He looks over to her, meeting her gaze immediately. She takes the cup from him without breaking eye contact, placing it somewhere behind her. He just watches her, waiting. 

“And…I thought I would never see you again.” He does not know what he was expecting her to say, but it definitely was not that. And he definitely is not prepared for the way his eyes begin to burn, “Do not say such things. You knew I would come for you.” He refuses to let the tears fall, but Tamtey sees them forming and frowns, “I knew you would, but the days were starting to blend together, and then th-the fire. They drugged me, and I had no idea what was happening, and I was so tired, ma So’lek.” Her voice is ragged and filled with heartache, only worsening as she continues, “And for a moment I thought I heard your voice, but I could not yell out to you. My lips would not move, and-and my throat was too tight, and I could not tell you that I–,” her voice cracks. So’lek feels his fragile heart cracking alongside it. He coos at her with a click of his tongue, as he would to an ailing animal, “You do not need to say any more, ma Tamtey.” She just shakes her head back in response, rapid enough to send the beads in her hair tinkling as they clack against each other.

“You do not understand, So’lek! I have so much left unsaid, and I thought you would never know it!” He reaches out a large hand to her face, cupping one cheek to bring her more into the present. One of his long fangs snags on his lip as he contemplates his next action, his tail thumping on the ground behind him. Tamtey doesn’t move or say another word, undoubtedly waiting for him to go on. As he stares into the glossy depths of her eyes, so full of anguish and regret, he feels the dam break, “I do understand. I understand more than you know. When you were taken, all I could think of was how I let it happen. How to get you back. After days had passed, I began to doubt myself, and I began to think–”, his last word is gagged out, jaw and throat muscles clenching, but he forces himself to continue, “I thought about how there was so much I had not told you, or showed you, or learned from you. I thought for just a moment–what if I do not find her? What if I am too late and she is gone by the time I get there? Hurting or dead? You, Tamtey! Dead! And I never would have told you how I felt–how I feel. Because I am a coward.” His words were all rushed, growing in volume until his last statement, which he practically roared out. 

He does not realize he is crying until Tamtey lifts one of her bandaged, shaking hands and wipes away a small accumulation of tears from beneath his eye, “You are not a coward, So’lek.” The tears in his eyes begin to burn anew with anger, “I am! I am older! I should be the wise and brave one. Not the one who hides!” He is sure the others can hear his yelling now, but they do not come rushing from their spots, opting to give him and Tamtey this moment for themselves. 

“You do not always need to be the wise and brave one, So’lek! You are still a person, and you still deserve the right to feel. You are not a coward for that.” 

Tamtey’s words are gentle. Soothing. He stares at her chapped lips, barely nodding as he responds, “You may be right about that. But I am still a coward for never telling you that I care for you.” At his words, Tamtey freezes in front of him, the thumb stroking his cheek sliding to a stop. For a breath, they just look at each other, yellow eyes locked on her moss-colored ones. Then, Tamtey leans into him, her nose only millimeters from his own, “Oel ngati kameie, ma So’lek.” 

So’lek sucks in a breath, heart stuttering beneath his healing ribs, but he does not waste a second, “Oel ngati kameie, ma Tamtey.” Then his hands are at her neck, thumbs brushing the base of her softened jaw as he pulls her into him the rest of the way. Their lips meet, both sets dry from dehydration as they slide against one another. But, So’lek does not mind, because to him it is still perfect. He savors it, the first time he tastes her, because she is just like how he imagined: sweet and something so undeniably Tamtey. In a wink, it is over, the two of them pulling back to rest their foreheads against one another, bare of gear or paint. Just skin on skin. They sit together, breathing each other in. So’lek relishes the moment, painting it into his memory. Eyes still closed, his plush lips part, “There is much to talk about, ma Tamtey. But you need rest.” He cannot see it, but still feels the warm breath that comes from the huff of annoyance Tamtey lets out, “You are such a sourpuss.” 

So’lek leans away from her, brow furrowing in confusion, “A what?” Tamtey just giggles at him, not giving him an answer. Instead, she pulls on his arm, hugging it to her body, “Let’s sleep then!” He cannot help the involuntary blush that rushes to his cheeks at the close contact. Even with this tension snapped between them, she still makes him so nervous. He has never met a woman like Tamtey before, and she was his. He slaps himself internally. Not his. Not yet. Maybe? 

He shakes his head to rid himself of the confusing thoughts swirling in the confines of his skull. 

Instead, he obliges, letting Tamtey’s playful personality win out against his grouchy one once again as he dramatically falls to the ground, pulling her down with him–gentle enough not to hurt her, of course–and she collapses onto him with an oof. 

They just lie there, arms encompassing each other in a tight embrace, Tamtey’s cheek resting on his naked chest. His eyes close, allowing himself to relax for the first time in over a week, when Tamtey’s snorting snicker breaks the peace. So’lek’s eyes peel open, neck tilting to look down at the woman resting on his pec. She is looking up at him, cheek squished against his muscle. Cute. 

He sighs, “What is it, Tamtey?”

She just snorts again, voice taunting him as she proclaims, “You like me!” So’lek groans, eyes rolling far into his head out of exasperation. 

“Go to sleep, Tamtey.” He cannot keep the fondness from his voice, one side of his mouth flickering into a smile. She just giggles again, smacking a wet kiss to his unclothed front, “Mwah! I can’t wait to tell everyone that you have a crush on me!” The shake of his chest is uncontrollable, Tamtey’s head flopping up and down on top of it from the strength of his laugh, “Tamtey!” She just cackles from her spot, chin digging into his skin. 

When they finally pull themselves together, So’lek presses a kiss to the crown of her head, “Goodnight, ma yawne.” She whispers it back, eyes falling closed.