hell is real and we're all in it

(door opens)

E: It’s been a while, Shidou.

S: Orbital floor fracture on the right. Traumatic retinal detachment. Bruising. Lacerations. Partial fracture of the thorax. This is Kajiyama-kun’s present condition.

E: Fuuta’s… S: Shiina-kun’s is even worse. Head lacerations. Bruising all over her body. Left anterior compression fracture. A sprained neck. Fractured ribs. Further fracturing to the left arm. And furthermore… this may be outside of my profession, but her mental health is deteriorating as well. E: Mahiru… S: Both their minds and bodies are at their limits. Let’s stop this already, Es-kun. A lot has happened while you were gone. At this rate, someone might end up dead.

E: I know that. I didn’t anticipate Kotoko’s behavior, either. For now, I’ll be taking the opportunity of this second trial to judge–

S: That’s not what I mean! I think we should put an end to Milgram as a whole. Both for our sake and for yours.

E: …That’s impossible.

S: Why?

E: I can’t think of any method of stopping it… or any way to get out.

S: …!

E: Milgram won’t end just because I want it to. That’s all I know. It won’t end until your judgment is complete. That’s the core of it.

S: You’re… the same as us, aren’t you? You just got caught up in a bigger picture.

E: Don’t lump me in with you! You’re an inmate, I’m the Warden. Now that I’ve started this, I intend to see it through until the end.

S: Es-kun…

E: Anyways, your eyes sure have gained some life since we last saw each other. Back then, you always wore an expression that made it hard to tell whether you were alive or dead, but…

S: Is that so?

E: Is it because you’ve received the result of the first trial…?

S: About that… I’ve been thinking that I would like to hear your thoughts. Why did you forgive me? Even though I asked not to be forgiven.

E: Why would the Warden listen to what a prisoner tells them? I decide based on my own standards.

S: You saw my true self, didn’t you? There ought to be very few people who have killed more than I have. In comparison to me, the prisoners who weren’t forgiven have also hardly done anything wrong.

E: You’re a doctor. I’ve deduced that your murders happened in the context of medical procedures.

S: …

E: Organ transplants… in other words, the act of removing organs from braindead patients. That’s what your murder is. Am I wrong?

S: I see. So that’s what was shown in the footage?

E: Not that straight-forward, of course. But from the information given, we came to the conclusion that this is the most likely scenario.

S: Hm? ‘We’...?

E: …

S: You said ‘we’ just now...

E: …Did I… say that…?

S: Yes.

E: …Fine. Don’t worry about it. Let’s get back to the topic. The topic of what I deduced, that is.

S: It’s impressive, isn’t it… Milgram… After all this time, I won’t try to deny it being a top class prison, but it really is the real thing.

E: Is that your way of saying I was right?

S: Well… About halfway, I would say.

E: Hmph. Either way, I judged that murders as the result of medical practices could be forgiven. Without regard to what you were hoping for.

S: …

E: I intend to investigate in my own way. Whether or not it’s okay to regard braindead patients entirely as dead… it seems that this has become an increasingly controversial topic in recent years.

S: You’ve done your research.

E: I don’t care about the discussions of your world, though. I decided that you could be forgiven. That’s enough.

S: … Why is that?

E: In the first place, getting involved with organ transplants is part of your job as a doctor. I doubt it’s something that you did out of your own free will.

S: I… I took a lot of pride in my work. I considered it a good deed. I wouldn’t say I didn’t do it out of my own will.

E: Well, you did it to save people, didn’t you? In truth, there must have been a fair amount of people whom you did save with it.

S: I thought so, too. Doing it for a good cause without a single doubt.

E: In exchange for the life of a person who has no option left but to await death, you can save a person who has the chance to live on, right? In that case, you shouldn’t even have to think twice.

S: I thought so, too… arrogant as I was.

E: Is that to say that you don’t think that way anymore?

S: Yes, that’s right. You know, I… continuously tried to persuade the relatives of a braindead patient who were against organ transplants. Giving them reasons like the ones you just mentioned, Es-kun. “In order to save the life of someone you don’t know, please let me kill your family,” I told them. It doesn’t even take much thinking to realize how cruel that is, but… I didn’t realize it until the very end.

E: … Isn’t that just a placebo? I would think that family ties play no role in that context.

S: Do you still feel that way if it’s your own family?

E: …

S: Es-kun, is your family alive and well?

E: I don’t know… I don’t remember.

S: Is that so? I’m sorry about that.

E: It’s fine. It’s not like I feel any particular way about something I don’t even remember. Besides, I don’t think my judgment would change even if it involved my own family.

S: There’s no way.

E: Even if my family happened to end up imprisoned in Milgram, I would see my job through to the end.

S: Family is… special.

E: Huh?

S: Let’s digress for a moment. Have you studied criminal law?

E: Well, the most important parts at least. I’ve been learning about it since I started working as the Warden.

S: Excellent. So, for example, if someone harbors a criminal or tampers with evidence in order to protect that criminal, that is a crime in itself, right?

E: That’s articles 103 and 104.

S: You remembered well. Can you recall article 105 as well?

E: No… Are you familiar with it?

S: It’s not my area of expertise, but I remember it because it left a big impression on me. Article 105 states that, “when a crime prescribed under the preceding two Articles is committed for the benefit of the criminal or fugitive by a relative of such person, the relative may be exempted.”

E: So essentially, even if someone covered for a criminal or helped them out, they won’t be held legally responsible for it if the criminal is part of their family?

S: That’s right. For me, no matter whether it’s according to the law or in any other context, it’s only normal to help each other in a family.

E: That’s a very fascinating story. But even with all this, I still don’t get what you’re trying to say.

S: (chuckles) I wonder. Maybe I just wanted you to listen to it.

E: … As always, I can’t entirely wrap my head around you.

S: I’m talking about how, unlike you, I can no longer claim that I’m doing my work for a good cause. I’ve lost the right to.

E: And something happened that changed your mind?

S: That’s… right. Although you’ll probably be finding out about that once you watch the extracted footage.

E: Yeah. Let’s have a look.

S: Es-kun. I’ve killed a lot of people. Like I previously told you in the interrogation, I’ve killed for scientific reasons as well. So…

E: Are you about to beg me not to forgive you again? Even though I’ve already told you it’s no use?

S: That’s right. Please don’t forgive me… is what I would like to ask.

E: …

S: I… “I don’t want to be forgiven”. That feeling of mine remains the same. I need to be punished. I need to atone for my sins. I don’t think Milgram is in the right, but…! There is no better place than this to atone for my crimes. But… as long as Milgram continues like this… we won’t be able to save those who get injured if I don’t get forgiven!

E: …!

S: Even now, Shiina-kun is still in a condition where any digression could be fatal. She can’t live without my treatment. If I’m not forgiven, she will end up dying!

E: That’s… true, I suppose.

S: From now on, conflicts between the prisoners will probably become more frequent. If I’m not there… they will be in even more danger.

E: Shidou…

(machinery whirrs, bell rings)

S: I need to be punished… but I need to stay alive, or young lives will be lost. I… I don’t know what to wish for anymore. I’m starting to think… that I want to live. That I want to be forgiven. Despite being so riddled with sins…!

E: … Shidou. Do you remember what I told you?

S: …

E: Back when you were still fine with dying at any moment, I told you to desperately want to live. “Because we have an attachment to life, punishments for sins exist in the first place. Your existence in itself is a sacrilege to Milgram and myself,” I said.

S: Yes… I remember.

E: And now, finally, you’ve gotten attached to life and become a real prisoner of Milgram. That’s what I believe. You wanting to be forgiven, and your wish… those are the steps that now represent you.

S: … That won’t do… I mustn’t be forgiven. Otherwise… the countless lives I’ve taken will never be paid back. 

E: Heh. If you’re really trying to give your life as compensation for the people you’ve killed, then there’s no reason to stay alive that will hold up, anyway.

S: …

E: Don’t face them with a life that you’re easily willing to throw away.

S: Es-kun, you’re a… strict… person, aren’t you?

E: I told you before, didn’t I? Because you’re the type of person I dislike the most.

S: (chuckles) It’s a pity. Since coming to Milgram, I’m being hated by children left and right. Even though I do like them.

E: Hmph. Like I care. But… but, you know…

S: Hm?

E: Thank you for saving Fuuta and Mahiru. I’m glad you’re here in Milgram, and I mean this from the bottom of my heart.

S: Es…kun…