AMAB (Assigned Malik At Birth)

"wtf is an egg laying kink?" my friend... I don't know how else to tell you this.... but it is all quite literally in the name

look at me. look me in my eyes. there are brave souls out here contemplating the eroticism of greasing a bike chain. we can't be gawking at every kink this side of light spanking or we'll be here all day

back in my undergrad I heard my 19 year old roommates tittering about sexy halloween costumes and ribbed condoms. one of them thought I was some kind of pervert bc I knew what furries were. they didn't even know what knotting was

I wish I was a female tiger because then if I was talking to someone and I was getting off topic I could say “but I tigress,” and then kill and eat them because I am a tiger

while you were busy jacking off & cumming hard. it rained outside beautifully

what do you think i was jacking off to...?

If you do not have a job then it's your duty to post about the characters Constantly. If you do have a job then it's your duty to imagine the characters in your job and also to neglect your job so you can post about the characters Constantly

commenting under art of a thin character "oh they look like they give the most dogshit hugs. like being embraced by a wet skeleton"

British guys when they cum probably: ive came ive bloody came

sneezes really hard and an egg shoots out of me while punching a hole clean through my panties and jeans, ricochets off the ground and re-enters me perfectly

its bonkers that its like. public knowledge. to the point of being a trope. that all cops hate internal affairs. and people still try to act like cops are capable of morality.

popular media has done an excellent job convincing the public that the job of an internal affairs department is to make sure billybob the baby murderer gets away so he can kill more babies instead of like. double checking that the cops are respecting peoples most basic human rights. which they aren't.

someone needs to invent reverse cornflakes. i want to eat a cereal that gives me a demonic erection and inflicts upon me an insatiable lust

not now mom I have to see what my mutuals with masters degrees are blogging about on tumblr

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