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Who is this? I don’t recognize her words The way she felt is foreign and strange Who was I? I don’t recall these writings Nor the feelings exchanged Sort of like staring at an empty frame. ~A

Intoxicating. Breathtakingly smooth Like whiskey with no burn. Not a drug in the world could grip me like you do Fully addicted, with no want to return Itching to curb the craving. ~A

I wished for you. On every star in the sky On every dandelion seed I let fly On every birthday candle’s light I wished… for you. ~A

Sat in darkness in a puddle of blood A brightness appeared, a simple nudge. A deep breath in, the light drew near What once held fear Now a canvas of stars A whisper on the wind to trees from afar A steady pace grew And then I met you – under a beautiful full sun. It was you. ~A

I’ve touched thousands of hands Heard thousands more voices And not a single touch felt like fire in my veins Nor a single voice, sound like coming home Until you.

The feeling of despair Like swallowing darkness that lingers and pools deep within your body The kind of pitch black you only find in the far corner of the room, Wondering what might be staring back With a weight so heavy you can’t bear it But impossible to release. That voice echoing that you are only your flaws Invisible hands clouding every thought Until dawn emerges And the monsters…

There will come a day when the aching stops It won’t leave forever I’ll still feel it when I can’t see But at least it won’t be constant and inescapably present

There will never be enough, Love Beauty Laughter. There will never be enough, to be too much.

I catch glimpses from time to time I feel it, some days, rushing towards me with every breath Sometimes I don’t feel it at all, and I wonder if it left But just when I feel hopeless and lost Am I granted a peek at my life I’ve yet to see

Falling, A feather descending like stone Waiting for the embrace of the net to envelope me in its vines, To hold me captive in its safety. It never did. A mirage, a belief that was never true A trap, like the illusion of water on hot pavement. As I look around, reaching for anything, I wonder how much my eyes deceive. A feather… So why not fly?

It was never a matter of “if” Because the answer to that, is “always”. The sound enticed me, The look stole my every glance, And the touch hooked me. Reeled in without resistance, The option of “freedom” was never even a thought. There is no want, to ever leave a paradise such as this.

I searched for it like an addict, In closets and dark corners, Under beds and in cabinets, When I should have been looking in comfort, Like blankets and coffee, The smell of lilacs and roses, I should have searched for it in warmth, Like fire or the sun, The feel of a soft breeze, rather than squinting through a storm. I should have been searching for it in laughter, But I worked myself…

My darling, it’s been lifetimes… So, even though I lost the memories, My soul will never forget the feeling. It may take years, but I will find you in every life I live, And even through this waiting, I am always yours.

My darling, it’s been lifetimes… So, even though I lost the memories, My soul will never forget the feeling. It may take years, but I will find you in every life I live, And even through this waiting, I am always yours.

Thank you. You’ve been through so much already in life, and while it is terrible to experience such pain and heartbreak, please believe me when I say, it wasn’t for nothing. All the panic, all the tears, the fear and sleepless nights, they all paved the way to where you are now. Every inch that you were walked on has turned into miles of solid concrete, a stable steppingstone to a life…

The most challenging thing, to me, in this life… Is time. The time it takes to do anything, is never the same Time with the ones you love is never long enough While time stands still in suffering. Falling in love can be instantaneous And waiting for Forever… takes an eternity Yet, time isn’t real, so why is she so difficult?

In all my life, I’ve never known such freedoms. The freedom to laugh To cry Sometimes both. The freedom to relax To live At the same time. The freedom to exist To smile And be happy doing it.