Ask Sythe

The premise begin with Yuji being born a baby girl instead of a boy. A girl growing up elicits different worries from gramps Wasuke. Worried about her once he has passed on from this world, Wasuke enrolls her in a catholic school and makes sure her education is paid for all the way to college. So there we have the first big change. In canon, a male Yuji would have become a firefighter if jjk didn't happen. This is out of his not knowing yet what to do with his life, having no big desires to work towards, and his one desire is to help people as much as he can. Ergo, a firefighter.

But here, girl Yu is raised in a catholic school with a long tradition of some of the girls joining convents during and after schooling for a varity of reasons. Fem Yu having the same wish to help people but with a different channel, becomes a novice sister instead. She wants to travel the world and helps people! She can do that under the awning of the church!

And then, a boy with 2 dogs and errant cursed finger placed near the schoolground happen. I want to build an expanded world for this draft. Looking at cursed energy purely as a human phenomenon happening mostly but not exclusively in Japan (either for Watsonian or Doylist reasons, take your pick), there are definitely other ways of framing and understanding the same phenomenon, as with most things having to do with human beliefs and as of yet not fully and conclusively explained metaphysics (especially when you consider the historical and cultural framing of cursed energy. We already see the Simurians having a completely different cultural framing for what is almost the same thing).

The Church has a loooong history of exorcism.

The church has also preserved many remains of saints and martyred followers over thousands of years. According to JJK rules, even ordinary people release cursed energy when they die. The remains of high monks and sorcerers can easily become high-grade cursed tools. If that is the case, the Vatican is guaranteed to possess a massive amount of formidable, high-grade cursed tools. Therefore, it is highly possible that in the eyes of the jujutsu world, the Vatican is an organization where most members are ordinary people but can still stand as solid as a rock because of their deep pockets, huge follower base, and a massive armory of cursed tools that allows even ordinary people to beat curses to smithereens. Ahh, I want to see Battle Nun Yuji in a 1v1 against Sukuna in that final battle, livestreamed to the whole world! A battle nun swinging her rosary-covered fist in furious close quarter combat against Sukuna who is double her size at the very least!

Because of Japan's own history with Catholicism and real-life martyred saints (including samurai and nobles), a group of jujutsu sorcerers has formed that is completely separate from the traditional Japanese sorcerer mold. They basically became their own faction, like the New Shadow Style in canon, while simultaneously reinforcing the power of the Vatican and things like that. Roughly speaking, they hold a countervailing power against the Jujutsu Society higher-ups, and even though they cooperate, they also fiercely clash behind the scenes as the church keeps trying to draw more sorcerers to their side. The thought that this human-based force has only one single dogma or a single cultural or religious approach is just ridiculous.

I am thinking about the behind-the-scenes political struggle between the Church and the Jujutsu higher-ups, who have very different perspectives on jujutsu and curses. Neither side is truly completely good, but within the ranks of both sides, there are good and bad people.

Yuji here is just too perfect to be a pawn in their war, so the church has to "show its teeth and claws" too. I think many of their relics can only be used if the user pays a certain price. The price of faith and devotion and whatnot.

I want to write a scene where Yuji makes a binding vow like that after witnessing the brutal lives of jujutsu sorcerers, born from a desire to have the strength to protect at least one or two people if she trades away her life or her faith.

I think that is even more likely to happen as we head toward the final battle. I want Gojo to survive. This story will be GoYuu because I find the idea and imagery of Gojo, an adult teacher in an extremely "problematic" relationship with a minor student, who is also a novice nun... it is incredibly thrilling. A shocking love scandal!!!

So I want to write the scene at the end of the battle, where Sister Itadori is immensely relieved to see that her plan and the holy relic worked, so she can no longer hold back her emotions, and she bursts into tears and tightly hugs the newly resurrected Gojo. There is even a kiss, right on live television, where Gojo comes back to life, sees the novice nun Yuji crying her eyes out while hugging her 'teacher', so on a whim, he pulls the young nun in and gives her a French kiss right then and there without thinking twice.

Essentially selling them the story that he's the 10th death painting and the only one that ever finishes baking, thus igniting Jujutsu world war as the three big clans make a go at each other. The story he feeds them is so good that even Kenjaku is duped. Because Yuji really is the product of his eugenic experiments. He is the prized success after a long string of failure. Even Kenjaku would be taken aback when he hears of this and starts thinking… oh man did my baby awaken something unexpected? ... At least.... that was the initial plan....

.... haaa.... most of it is still there just in slightly different form. But the story starts out in a comedic tone with this somewhat flippant Yuji going around throwing people off his tail by giving them some of the most outlandish stories out there about who he really is and what he really is trying to do. And then now I'm writing a mournful baby Yuji who gets to watch his future self slowly surrenders his humanity and becomes a sleeping good to keep the rest of humanity surviving in one of the most horrifying god machine set up out there. It also was supposed to be a lot smaller in scale... but now we have ARCS ladies and gentlemen!!!

That is the joke. Because I am singularly the worst person when it comes to predicting the length and scope of my own writing!!! Because I am prone to getting lost in the character's heads! And my brain likes big, complex concepts far too much! And I demand hard science in a series that is clearly not all that sciency but fuck that shit we gotta ball with real science or else! How the frig do you scientifically explain sorcery? But yes you can so long as you treat conceptual soul physics as an extension of some of the most frontier science of the nature of reality and our place in this universe!!! Is life actually a logic virus on the tapestry of reality? Like a metatastizing cancer that is trying to spread beyond the scope of a singular planet? What is the nature of consciousness? Are we indeed just tiny microcospic part of a material universe in the midst of awakening to its sense of self??

It's funny is it not??!!! 😭😭😭Mama's Boy was supposed to be a oneshot and all!!! But then my brain started asking questions and I can't take no answer for an answer.

Just ask @erimies. Anytime I say, this is gonna be a oneshot, she laughes at me. LAUGHS AT ME!!! 😭

Something funny about Etalon that is not written? Hmm... at one point in the story, Yuji works for a maid cafe. This is his maid uniform:

One aspect I absolutely want to include in Etalon once Choso and bros Because it takes a lot of money to feed 9 dudes who have not eaten for 150 years!!! It takes a lot of money to run a 10 person household period! Baby Yuji is good with a lot of things via inheriting the memories of his future self, but money making is not one of them. Because bad end Yuji, the Yuji of that other timeline, was a bum for a good bit in his life, running away from the jujutsu world, and then when he decided to come back because he could not just sit and watch disasters unfold, he had become someone that governments and organizations cater to on almost every physical mundane aspect of his life. Money was never really much of an issue to him especially because he didn't have anyone he needed to take care of for long. And then he became a god of the wasteland with people revering him and placing tributes around his proximity regardless of his telling them not to... and from there on it just does not improve. So... Yuji is not good with money.

But he needs to get good with money. Because he is the only one his brothers have in this modern world.

So the running joke of Etalon is that Ten in the mouths of the jujutsu world is this terrifyingly powerful and mysterious sorcerer whose power pretty much breaks the scale and people are so curious and terrified about whatever it is he is up to.... and.... cue the scene change... he's flipping burgers at WacDonald on his second shift before his third shift at the maid cafe, trying to save up money to repair the mountain home he got for his brothers and paying the grocery bills.

And then one day a group of students from this weird school called the Cursed Technical College Tokyo AND Kyoto branches visit his cafe while gossiping about the newest Special Grade Sorcerer known as Ten. Everybody asking what he even looks like and Megumi listing off his known physical traits: teenage boy, pink hair, so high...

What shade of pink? Somebody asks.

That shade of pink. Says Megumi pointing at the maid waitress passing by in the cute costume with the bubblegum pink hair, and everybody in their group looks and everybody thinks...

There's no way right?

Iori’s footsteps froze. Amidst the sweltering heat and the thick smoke of burning incense, he felt as if possessed, turning around to take a seat. Perhaps his long-harbored, unrequited love was so starved and sensitive that it forced him to cling to any shred of hope.

The old woman smirked, giving him a knowing look before whispering an incredibly bizarre method: "Just wait for a waning moon night when the two of you are sharing a room. Get 'her' to drink some sake mixed with your 'essence,' and she will naturally fall head over heels for you."

What kind of nonsensical, perverted nonsense is this?!

What the hell did she mean by "essence"? His semen or his cursed energy mixed into the alcohol? It was utterly unreliable and disgusting! Iori immediately stood up and walked away, cursing the old fraud in his mind. Yet, that crazy idea somehow acted like a parasite, lingering and taking root in his mind for weeks to follow. It was true that jujutsu sorcerers rarely got drunk, but… what if it was a premium sake infused with cursed energy, plus a little bit of his "personal touch"? Would it actually get Uncle Yuji drunk enough to look at him differently? He began to map out all sorts of thrilling yet guilty scenarios in his head again.

And then, that rare "opportunity" finally presented itself on the day Iori took his Grade 1 Sorcerer promotion exam.

To ensure the absolute safety of the future Clan Head, the higher-ups had actually deployed Uncle Yuji himself to act as his chaperone. It was truly the privilege of a thoroughly spoiled young master. Iori performed flawlessly on the mission, his strength completely overwhelming. But ironically, the information from the "Window" was severely flawed. The cursed spirits in that village weren't just Grade 1; two of them had actually evolved into mutant Special Grades.

Although Iori drained his strength to the limit to win, the battle was so violent that it destroyed a large portion of the village, forcing all the residents to evacuate to a nearby small city in the dead of night. The higher-ups of the jujutsu world quickly booked the major hotels in the area to temporarily house the displaced villagers.

As a result, by the time the exhausted uncle-nephew duo, covered in filth and cursed spirit blood, dragged themselves to the city center, every single room was completely booked. Infuriatingly, the only vacant places left were in a row of… Love Hotels catering to couples, with flashing neon signs in various colors that made one blush just looking at them.

Iori stood frozen at the entrance, his face flushed red with embarrassment. In stark contrast to his flustered nephew, Uncle Yuji just burst into hearty laughter, slapping him repeatedly on the shoulder:

"Haha! Our Iori is already 18, right? Surely you're not shy about this kind of stuff, are you? Let's go, I'm exhausted. Just having a place to wash up and sleep is a godsend!"

With that, Yuji picked a hotel with the largest heart-shaped sign at random and walked in. Left with no choice, Iori followed closely behind his uncle like a timid child who had done something wrong, his face burning hot as he clutched his backpack.

But the most bizarre part was yet to come. Following a strict, odd rule of this love hotel, they didn't allow single guests to rent rooms at night to prevent suicides. You had to go in pairs. The receptionist handed them the key to the largest, most VIP room available.

Click.

The moment the door opened, Iori nearly dropped his cursed tool backpack right onto the floor.

The entire room was decorated in an incredibly intense and cheesy "honeymoon" style. Dim, shifting pink and purple lights illuminated a colossal round bed sitting right in the center of the room. On the bright red bedsheets, someone had thoughtfully arranged two pillows embroidered with bright, eye-catching red words: Yes! and Yes! (there was no No in sight). If that wasn't enough, heart-shaped balloons in red and pink hung all over the ceiling and walls, swaying gently in the draft of the air conditioner. The air in the room carried a faint scent of roses so sweet it made the 18-year-old boy's head spin.

It was too embarrassing! Way too stimulating for a kid who had recently been secretly masturbating with a toy modeled after his own uncle!

Standing beside him, Yuji also paused for a beat at the room's overwhelming "hospitality." He scratched his cheek, giving his nephew a wry smile:

"Yikes… this room… the decor is a bit too enthusiastic, isn't it, Iori?"