Ask Banana Hammock

Congrats, Cloudchaser, on winning a date with Hammock!

Face it, tiger. You just won the jackpot. ;)

Message me to claim your prize.

“Woah, let’s back up a few steps here. A mare who has cancer and has never had sex before is also still a mare. She’s got a personality and feelings and stuff. If she was going to live forever, but wanted to have sex for the first time with me for whatever other reasons - like ‘cause I’m hot, or ‘cause she knew from my videos that I’m good at it - she’d have the same chances of getting a yes if we click."

5. Are you a virgin?

23. What are some of your favorite physical characteristics for your crush to have?

“Expressive faces, long legs, large wings, athletic – that stuff’s nice, but like I said, it’s not really important. …I dunno when I stopped caring about that sorta thing. Probably ‘cause I see so much of the ‘ideal body’ stuff in porn. It gets kinda boring if everypony looks like that all the time. Or not boring, but, not something that stands out as a favourite or anything.”

25. Do you think that you’re a good kisser?

“But you don’t have to take my word for it, if you come off anon and ask real nicely” Hammock points to his face and winks.

30. What’s something that always turns you on?

1. Who was your first kiss and what was it like?

“Her name was Sassaflash. We were in the same grade nine theatre class together. Her coat was my favourite sorta turquoise-blue. She always had her head in the clouds, but when I was on stage she never took her eyes off me.” Hammock smiles. “We kissed behind the curtain one day after class. It was awesome.”

3. Do you have a crush?

“Nope. But you guys’ll be the first to know if I ever do.” Hammock says, adding a cheeky wink to the end.

22. What's your "type"?

2. Are you in a relationship? If so, are you happy?

"Nope! Single and cool with it. It lets me enjoy the company of other ponies without getting all mixed up in drama," Hammock grins. "An' besides, if I was with somepony, they'd have to be okay with what I do to pay the rent, and they'd have to be okay with me being flirty, and being... Uh, what did Fancy call it? ...Uh. Non-magnanimous? Non-maganamous? Open to me doing sexy stuff with other ponies and being able to talk about it and whatever. And that's... Well that takes a special somepony."

16. Have you ever loved someone on a romantic level?

“I’ve loved a lot, actually. Been in about eight relationships – nine if you count that one fling in Appleoosa – nine and a half if you count that letters-based one when I was at Las Pegasus Secondary...” Hammock shakes his head. “I wouldn’t count that one though. It was more like, I dunno, loving an idea?”

27. Have you ever had a secret admirer?