the dream team

Okay, so… I basically found out I was ace when I did some research over sexualities (because I was creating OCs at the time and I wanted to learn about the sexuality spectrum). I happened to stumble upon the term aromantic, and I remember thinking how that was the only thing that I found that matched my orientation. I know stuff like that takes time for people take in, but for me I just had a brief epiphany about the fact that term “aromantic” exists and I quickly accepted it. The only reason it was easy for me to identify with it is for the fact that I never felt any soft of attraction towards anybody. I never experienced that gravitational pull towards a certain someone. That stuff didn’t happen for me. And I legitimately can’t imagine myself being romantic with someone. I just can’t. Plus, the signs grew more apparent as I grew older since the people around me would talk about trying to go after their crush or something along those lines. Sometimes it would bother me because it seemed like the only topic that seemed “important”, in a way.. (I don’t know how to explain it)? Like why can’t we talk about things other than romance, love, and stuff like that. I just never understood the importance of those things. I know for a lot of people, finding that one significant other is something they want to do, and I get it. But for me, it was never a concern. At some point, I couldn’t help but feel quite secluded knowing that I was seemingly the only one that had this phenomenon where I can’t feel attraction towards anyone. The fact that this “phenomenon” was never widely known in the world didn’t make it better. So when you go and tell others in real life that you aren’t attracted to people at all and/or don’t want to look for a relationship ever, you tend to get looks from them. But it’s not their fault I guess. Society tends to put emphasis on romance/relationships in subtle ways really. I don’t know if it’s true though; that’s just the way I see it. It’s whatever I guess; I don’t mind it. But then I finally discovered the term “aromantic”, and I finally found that validation that this “phenomenon” I had is normal too! It’s just not that common! I felt okay ever since then, so… yeah!Okay, enough about me. I’ll try to speak some advice about your case, but I can’t guarantee that it’ll help//Alrighty, it looks like you’re a bit confused about your relationship with your girlfriend. I don’t blame you if you feel that way. Stuff like that is a totally new experience, and it can be hard to navigate through a journey like that. Honestly, I cannot have a say in what romance should feel like because I do not have any experience to vouch for it. It’s different for everybody too. But I think I do have a grasp on what a platonic version of it is. It can come if the form of having this swell of affection towards a person because you want to make them happy and/or care for them, but not in a way where you have to do lovey dovey stuff in order to do that. It can be simple things like going out somewhere, having lunch with each other, doing simple gestures that makes the other person smile, getting into their interests, etc… things like that! I’m not quite sure if you know about this, but there is such a thing called a “squish” which is the platonic version of a crush. (Here’s a definition if you need it.) And alongside that, it’s totally possible to be in a platonic relationship! So if you’re unsure about being romantic, being platonic is a-okay! But if anything, I think you should take things slow with your girlfriend. There’s nothing wrong with experimenting what your boundaries are. It’s pretty much one of the only ways you can find out if you happen to be bi or aro. You have to give yourself a bit of time to experience things. Knowing that you’re romantic or not doesn’t happen in an instant. And that’s okay! I’d recommend talking to your girlfriend about this so that she can help you out with this and understand your situation. If you don’t address this with her, it will be a little tougher for you, so speak up to her about it when you get the chance.But yeah..! That’s all I have to say for the matter. I hope things go well for you! :D ]]