When Monster High teased a new Ghostbuster doll I was not expecting Gozer!
Beg pardon? I kinda want it…

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@ask-gozer
When Monster High teased a new Ghostbuster doll I was not expecting Gozer!
Beg pardon? I kinda want it…

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Ok so imagine this:
You're an ancient Mesopotamian deity. You rule over dead souls in the underworld with an icy fist and possess the power to destroy the world. You can choose any form you wish, shapeshifting at will to any terrible appearance that will strike the most fear into everyone around you. Over the eons countless human sacrifices have been made in your name, cults have formed around your visage, tirelessly working to bring you to the mortal plane so you can reign your destruction upon the earth.
Then, one fated day, you succeed. You make it to the human realm and are ready to sink your teeth into the flesh of this world. But no one said you couldn't play with your food first.
You ask the nearest human to choose. Choose what terrible form you should take as you rake your claws into the earth and feast on souls with your terrible teeth. The human tries to resist, but you sink your senses into his pitiful human brain and pry it from him. Surely his terrified mind has thought of a nightmarish form for your oncoming conquest
You assume the form of Mr. Peanut.
Ok. So not the best form. You can't exactly destroy much like this, but you manage. The humans defeat you. Damn. Well, next time maybe you wont be so callous and will just choose a form yourself.
But then it keeps happening
It keeps.
FUCKING.
HAPPENING.
And you are forced to realize that because some jackass in 1984 couldn't keep this thoughts straight you are now forever tied to the visage of a dinky foods mascot and keep manifesting with its STUPID FACE.
You think for a second maybe theres some higher deitys out there that for some reason keep giving you this form. But no, thats impossible. It's that stupid humans fault.
I will never be free. I can’t escape this fucking marshmallow. Fml.
was gozer from ghostbusters the nonbinary blueprint
Yes.
IIIIIIIT'S KRIIIIIIIMAAAAAAS
HELL YEAH!!!
F-Fuck!
Gooozer...
Need... help...
- Boogie
@ask-future-boogieman-and-samhain
Woah! Boogie?? What’s wrong??
Boogie: I'm... I'm pregnant.
…
what.
Boogie: I'M FUCKING 🤰, GOZER >:(
I KINDA GOT THAT BUT
HOW?!
WHY?!
DOES SAM KNOW??? IS HE THE FATHER??
@vigo-thecarpathian HELP-
Boogie: LOOK, I DON'T KNOW HOW THIS HAPPENED OR IF SAM'S THE DAD! I'VE BEEN FEELING BAD RECENTLY AND HAD THE DOCTOR TELL ME THE NEWS!
IF YOU DONT KNOW HOW IT HAPPENED DOES THAT MEAN SAM ISNT THE DAD?!

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F-Fuck!
Gooozer...
Need... help...
- Boogie
@ask-future-boogieman-and-samhain
Woah! Boogie?? What’s wrong??
Boogie: I'm... I'm pregnant.
…
what.
Boogie: I'M FUCKING 🤰, GOZER >:(
I KINDA GOT THAT BUT
HOW?!
WHY?!
DOES SAM KNOW??? IS HE THE FATHER??
@vigo-thecarpathian HELP-
F-Fuck!
Gooozer...
Need... help...
- Boogie
@ask-future-boogieman-and-samhain
Woah! Boogie?? What’s wrong??
Boogie: I'm... I'm pregnant.
…
what.
F-Fuck!
Gooozer...
Need... help...
- Boogie
@ask-future-boogieman-and-samhain
Woah! Boogie?? What’s wrong??
Hey, knock knock. It's Peyton. Here to meet the baby, like a normal person.
@ask-payton-gb
Hello dear! Clement is in the nursery with Mels, if you wanna come see.
How’s life with a baby? Bet you’re exhausted.
a little bit! but shockingly our little one is very well-behaved. they don't cry often, they don't fuss. just a sweet little baby. I recall my mother saying I was this way when I was born, so I suspect its normal for gods and/or demigods.

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Hey! I heard Melissa had the baby. Congratulations!
I'd be there right now but Uncle Janosz texted me before asking me to babysit Garraka. We didn't think it'd be safe for him to meet the baby, not yet anyway.
@ask-payton-gb
oh! hello Payton! thank you! pfft- Garraka needs to be babysat? poor thing.. you and Garraka can come over and meet the bay at our house once me and Melissa get home tomorrow. <3
you guys at the hospital yet?
-Oscar.
We arrived a few minutes ago. Melissa got put into a wheelchair and taken by a doctor, now we're all waiting for, y'know, all our friends to arrive. 'Coz Melissa wanted everyone to be here.
Sounds good. I just got here. I'll find you guys.
is... EVERYONE arriving here..? I'm not sure how the doctors and nurses would react to Garraka and @ask-future-boogieman-and-samhain showing up (no offence guys).
Boogie: WE'RE HERE (Samhainhadtostopfortoysforthebabyandshit)
Yes, hello, everyone.
I told Garraka to stay at home because I didn't think a frozen, pointy ice giant would be good for a newborn baby. Or new parents.
Stay Puft should be here soon-ish...
Ooh what did you get Sam
Samhain: A bunch of stuffed teddy bears and the Gáe Bulg.
Aww.
Wait, what-? Sam, you're not giving that to a newborn baby.
Samhain: The child is a demi-god and demi-gods must have weapons givethebabyaspearofdeath/lh
No, give me the spear of death. For fuck's sake, you couldn't have waited until the baby was, I dunno, ten? That's when I got my first sword.
Samhain: No! When I was only two, my mother, The Morrígan, placed a sword in my hand and told me to slaughter the remaining Fomorians! So, this child can handle it >:(
HE IS MINUTES OLD
Samhain: And???
Wait, she had the baby already-
SAMHAIN DO NOT GIVE THE BABY THAT SPEAR.
Samhain: *teleports the spear into the hospital room*
NO-
@ask-gozer if a spear appears in the room get it OUT.
got it.
Samhain: Awww :(
uuuugggggghhhhhhhh.... I feel like shit. but I have a baby in my arms!! nurses already cut the cord, you guys can come meet them if you want. we decided to name them Clement. the nurses screamed when they noticed their eyes are pitch black hehehe
they're so cute aren't they quite too... I expected more crying.
Am I late-?
Oh! Aww. What's his their name?
No you’re not late, hey Puft. Their name is Clement.
I think they have your eyes. Super cute.
mhm... my sweet child.. I can't believe it.
I feel almost sorry for this child. Barely a day old and already exposed to the "most dangerous" people in the world.
They're barely a day old and you've already got those stupid eyes.
hey! my eyes aren't stupid-
they're the child of the god of destruction, they'll be fine~ they're my baby after all.
And their godfather was once upon a time a genocidal lunatic. Yeah, totally fine.
oh- shut UP. you're not like that anymore. no use beating yourself up over it. just be happy!... you wanna hold the baby?
you guys at the hospital yet?
-Oscar.
We arrived a few minutes ago. Melissa got put into a wheelchair and taken by a doctor, now we're all waiting for, y'know, all our friends to arrive. 'Coz Melissa wanted everyone to be here.
Sounds good. I just got here. I'll find you guys.
is... EVERYONE arriving here..? I'm not sure how the doctors and nurses would react to Garraka and @ask-future-boogieman-and-samhain showing up (no offence guys).
Boogie: WE'RE HERE (Samhainhadtostopfortoysforthebabyandshit)
Yes, hello, everyone.
I told Garraka to stay at home because I didn't think a frozen, pointy ice giant would be good for a newborn baby. Or new parents.
Stay Puft should be here soon-ish...
Ooh what did you get Sam
Samhain: A bunch of stuffed teddy bears and the Gáe Bulg.
Aww.
Wait, what-? Sam, you're not giving that to a newborn baby.
Samhain: The child is a demi-god and demi-gods must have weapons givethebabyaspearofdeath/lh
No, give me the spear of death. For fuck's sake, you couldn't have waited until the baby was, I dunno, ten? That's when I got my first sword.
Samhain: No! When I was only two, my mother, The Morrígan, placed a sword in my hand and told me to slaughter the remaining Fomorians! So, this child can handle it >:(
HE IS MINUTES OLD
Samhain: And???
Wait, she had the baby already-
SAMHAIN DO NOT GIVE THE BABY THAT SPEAR.
Samhain: *teleports the spear into the hospital room*
NO-
@ask-gozer if a spear appears in the room get it OUT.
got it.
Samhain: Awww :(
uuuugggggghhhhhhhh.... I feel like shit. but I have a baby in my arms!! nurses already cut the cord, you guys can come meet them if you want. we decided to name them Clement. the nurses screamed when they noticed their eyes are pitch black hehehe
they're so cute aren't they quite too... I expected more crying.
Am I late-?
Oh! Aww. What's his their name?
No you’re not late, hey Puft. Their name is Clement.
I think they have your eyes. Super cute.
mhm... my sweet child.. I can't believe it.
I feel almost sorry for this child. Barely a day old and already exposed to the "most dangerous" people in the world.
They're barely a day old and you've already got those stupid eyes.
hey! my eyes aren't stupid-
they're the child of the god of destruction, they'll be fine~ they're my baby after all.
you guys at the hospital yet?
-Oscar.
We arrived a few minutes ago. Melissa got put into a wheelchair and taken by a doctor, now we're all waiting for, y'know, all our friends to arrive. 'Coz Melissa wanted everyone to be here.
Sounds good. I just got here. I'll find you guys.
is... EVERYONE arriving here..? I'm not sure how the doctors and nurses would react to Garraka and @ask-future-boogieman-and-samhain showing up (no offence guys).
Boogie: WE'RE HERE (Samhainhadtostopfortoysforthebabyandshit)
Yes, hello, everyone.
I told Garraka to stay at home because I didn't think a frozen, pointy ice giant would be good for a newborn baby. Or new parents.
Stay Puft should be here soon-ish...
Ooh what did you get Sam
Samhain: A bunch of stuffed teddy bears and the Gáe Bulg.
Aww.
Wait, what-? Sam, you're not giving that to a newborn baby.
Samhain: The child is a demi-god and demi-gods must have weapons givethebabyaspearofdeath/lh
No, give me the spear of death. For fuck's sake, you couldn't have waited until the baby was, I dunno, ten? That's when I got my first sword.
Samhain: No! When I was only two, my mother, The Morrígan, placed a sword in my hand and told me to slaughter the remaining Fomorians! So, this child can handle it >:(
HE IS MINUTES OLD
Samhain: And???
Wait, she had the baby already-
SAMHAIN DO NOT GIVE THE BABY THAT SPEAR.
Samhain: *teleports the spear into the hospital room*
NO-
@ask-gozer if a spear appears in the room get it OUT.
got it.
Samhain: Awww :(
uuuugggggghhhhhhhh.... I feel like shit. but I have a baby in my arms!! nurses already cut the cord, you guys can come meet them if you want. we decided to name them Clement. the nurses screamed when they noticed their eyes are pitch black hehehe
they're so cute aren't they quite too... I expected more crying.
Am I late-?
Oh! Aww. What's his their name?
No you’re not late, hey Puft. Their name is Clement.
I think they have your eyes. Super cute.
mhm... my sweet child.. I can't believe it.
you guys at the hospital yet?
-Oscar.
We arrived a few minutes ago. Melissa got put into a wheelchair and taken by a doctor, now we're all waiting for, y'know, all our friends to arrive. 'Coz Melissa wanted everyone to be here.
Sounds good. I just got here. I'll find you guys.
is... EVERYONE arriving here..? I'm not sure how the doctors and nurses would react to Garraka and @ask-future-boogieman-and-samhain showing up (no offence guys).
Boogie: WE'RE HERE (Samhainhadtostopfortoysforthebabyandshit)
Yes, hello, everyone.
I told Garraka to stay at home because I didn't think a frozen, pointy ice giant would be good for a newborn baby. Or new parents.
Stay Puft should be here soon-ish...
Ooh what did you get Sam
Samhain: A bunch of stuffed teddy bears and the Gáe Bulg.
Aww.
Wait, what-? Sam, you're not giving that to a newborn baby.
Samhain: The child is a demi-god and demi-gods must have weapons givethebabyaspearofdeath/lh
No, give me the spear of death. For fuck's sake, you couldn't have waited until the baby was, I dunno, ten? That's when I got my first sword.
Samhain: No! When I was only two, my mother, The Morrígan, placed a sword in my hand and told me to slaughter the remaining Fomorians! So, this child can handle it >:(
HE IS MINUTES OLD
Samhain: And???
Wait, she had the baby already-
SAMHAIN DO NOT GIVE THE BABY THAT SPEAR.
Samhain: *teleports the spear into the hospital room*
NO-
@ask-gozer if a spear appears in the room get it OUT.
got it.
Samhain: Awww :(
uuuugggggghhhhhhhh.... I feel like shit. but I have a baby in my arms!! nurses already cut the cord, you guys can come meet them if you want. we decided to name them Clement. the nurses screamed when they noticed their eyes are pitch black hehehe
they're so cute aren't they quite too... I expected more crying.
Am I late-?
Oh! Aww. What's his their name?
No you’re not late, hey Puft. Their name is Clement.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
you guys at the hospital yet?
-Oscar.
We arrived a few minutes ago. Melissa got put into a wheelchair and taken by a doctor, now we're all waiting for, y'know, all our friends to arrive. 'Coz Melissa wanted everyone to be here.
Sounds good. I just got here. I'll find you guys.
is... EVERYONE arriving here..? I'm not sure how the doctors and nurses would react to Garraka and @ask-future-boogieman-and-samhain showing up (no offence guys).
Boogie: WE'RE HERE (Samhainhadtostopfortoysforthebabyandshit)
Yes, hello, everyone.
I told Garraka to stay at home because I didn't think a frozen, pointy ice giant would be good for a newborn baby. Or new parents.
Stay Puft should be here soon-ish...
Ooh what did you get Sam
Samhain: A bunch of stuffed teddy bears and the Gáe Bulg.
Aww.
Wait, what-? Sam, you're not giving that to a newborn baby.
Samhain: The child is a demi-god and demi-gods must have weapons givethebabyaspearofdeath/lh
No, give me the spear of death. For fuck's sake, you couldn't have waited until the baby was, I dunno, ten? That's when I got my first sword.
Samhain: No! When I was only two, my mother, The Morrígan, placed a sword in my hand and told me to slaughter the remaining Fomorians! So, this child can handle it >:(
HE IS MINUTES OLD
Samhain: And???
Wait, she had the baby already-
SAMHAIN DO NOT GIVE THE BABY THAT SPEAR.
Samhain: *teleports the spear into the hospital room*
NO-
@ask-gozer if a spear appears in the room get it OUT.
got it.
VIGO!!! Melissa is in labour. I think I'm having a heart attack.
-G <3
Okay, don't freak out any more then you alreadu have. Are you at a hospital yet? Because I'm not driving you there. Because my driving is atrocious
im at home with her.
Okay, at least you're with her.
@dr-janosz-poha darling we need to get Melissa to the hospital- like right now-
got it love. calm down, both of you. is Melissa okay Gozer?
she's calm as clouds. I have no idea how.
im okay @vigo-thecarpathian and Janosz!! but yeah please come pick us up.
We're on our way. Just keep breathing or something.
will do.
We're nearly there. Sometimes I forget how close you two live.
sounds good. we're outside waiting. the doctors are gonna have a field day when they see Gozer- neither of you have really been to a doctors office have you?... yikes.
Oh well. That's an issue for another time. You're the priority right now.
thank you.
@ask-gozer, stop crying, damnit. Your wife kinda needs you to focus.
Im sorry. I'm so overwhelmed... *sniffle* I'm fine. I'll get it together.