~Häphâzárd ßlôg~

I feel like I could be much more compassionate, caring and overall more attentive, empathetic AND PERHAPS assertive after another ‘psychoanalyze even minuscule things to large degrees and get wrapped up in them’ THEN become worse as I’m trapped by my own self-righteousness or something. Every day is learning experience, though. I have to believe in myself even if no one else does *and I believe that because you don't have a choice. I'm blessed and feel of guilty for not doing better but I shall. I shall dammit!

Fighting battles, everyday. Mental struggles of discipline and courage and it feels like I'm failing as of late. Also regret over ways I've treated people or let people treat me. Too much chaos up there, too much leisure. Need to settle down and and chill out. I can’t be mad at those who left me, how could I? I still love them, they had their reasons. Move forward, get a hair cut, shave shower and regroup. Be a functional person and succeed in being me and no one else. Let the world do its thing while I do mine. Strive to do my best at something. I feel like I’ve digressed. I feel lonely and ten minutes later the opposite. My most gratitude and apologies at the same time. The burden was great and it sometimes feels like the weight is too much. Things will go back to being good

Some old Mass Effect Screens