AromaticBoy

Sydney succeeded in everything she did. She was your high school Valedictorian, Student Council President, and even the top swimmer in the state, eventually receiving a college scholarship for it. She was popular and well-liked all through high school.

So were you. You dated Sydney your freshman and sophomore year of high school, where you explored so many things together. You loved her—and she loved you.

But by your junior year of high school, you got in with the wrong crowd. Instead of studying with her, you went out to get drunk. Rumors began to spread about your increasingly dangerous drug and alcohol use. By the time Sydney learned of your first affair, your relationship was over.

She was heartbroken, obviously. It took her months to get over you, especially when she listened to the gossip floating around about your weekend sexcapades. The last time you spoke was graduation—a brisk conversation barely acknowledging your past relationship.

Sydney only thought about you in passing over the next two years. She’d occasionally see pictures of you or hear vague updates about your life, but she was completely disinterested in hearing about your problems. You barely snuck into a lower tier college before flunking out in two years.

Then one day, your Facebook profile was suddenly gone. She stopped hearing anything about you. It was like you disappeared. She always wondered what had happened to you. You may have broke her heart, but she could never truly stop caring about you, even if she’d never want to be with you again.

At least, until she started working Biggest Widdle Daycare.

You saw her first that day. You were laying on the changing table in the middle of another messy diaper change. Your “Nanny” as they called them at Daycare, babbling at you like you were an actual toddler.

Please, no. Don’t let her see me like this.

“Almost done with wipies, Joey! Then you can go back to story time!”

“And over here is where we do diaper changes!” you hear the Principal explain, “as you can see it’s pretty busy!”

Your face burned as Sydney made eye contact with you.

“Joey…is that you?” she asked, shock in her voice.

Your Nanny answers for you, noticing your embarrassment. “It sure is! He’s my favorite lil’ stinker here! Always so well behaved!”

Sydney continues to stare at you in utter disbelief, her mouth opening and closing as she struggles to find any fitting words.

You cover your face as your Nanny applies a generous coating of baby powder. The infantile smell overwhelming your senses, olfactory proof of your new status in life.

“Yeah, we used to…” Sydney hesitates, “well, we were friends in high school.”

Your Nanny gave her a knowing look, “well, I’m sure you’ll be best friends again soon enough! Don’t you think, Joey?”

You sheepishly nod your head as your diaper is pulled up and taped on.

“There, all done, Joey! So much better than that icky diaper you had before! Why don’t you show your friend Sydney where you do story time!”

You look at your Nanny, eyes begging her to stop. “Oh, honey, I’m sure you want your shorts but I think it’s best we keep them off, you’ve already had two stinkies today. We need to check you more often.”

Sydney smiles, recovering herself, reaching out her hand for you to grab.

You look into her eyes, trying to figure what she’s thinking. You’re more embarrassed than you’ve ever been since your parents sent you to the Regression Center after you were arrested for possession of cocaine.

“Don’t be shy, Joey! It’s just me, Nanny Sydney! Can you be a big boy show me where story time is?”

You grab her hand, feeing a jolt of electricity flow through you. You remember her touch, how it made you feel, the power it once held over you. Memories race through your head, like a movie played at 5x speed.

Sydney’s hand flinches too, as if she too felt the same electricity. But if she also had the same thoughts, she didn’t show it.

“Thank you, Joey! My little prince, here to show me around his little kingdom!”

The reading nook is just across the room, in full view of the changing tables. You hate how condescending this walk is, but you’re still excited holding Sydney’s hand—not that kind of excited, though. You lost that ability along with your continence. Though the feeling of attraction torturously remained.

As you get to your designated spot, you obediently sit down. The Nanny reading the story smiles at you.

“I’ll come check on your diaper later, Joey,” Sydney whispers in your ear. You shiver, not in embarrassment, but longing.

You don’t hear any of the story for the next twenty minutes. Memories of your relationship with Sydney continue to flood your brain.

You see her laughing on her bed, half naked, waiting for you to come kiss her. Next, you’re cuddling up behind her as the big spoon, you can still feel her warm skin on yours. You hear her whispering in the darkness, promising she’ll always love you.

“Earth to Joey?” you hear distantly.

You look around, every other little is gone, excitedly preparing for recess.

“Something on your mind?” Sydney asks, “I know littles can be spacey but you were really out!”

“I, uh…” you mumble.

“It’s okay, Joey. It’s perfectly normal. Maybe it was just because you were working hard to fill that diapee for Nanny Sydney!”

Something about the way she said it made you feel smaller than you ever thought possible. You knew she remembered everything, just as you did. But calling herself Nanny Sydney…she didn’t see you as anything more than a little. That much was clear.

“Only a little soggy, mister! You excited for recess?”

“I guess…” you trail off.

“You guess? Well, you should be more excited than that! You get to run and play with Nanny Sydney! That warrants more than a ‘I guess!’ Can you say ‘I’m excited to play with Nanny Sydney,’ little one?”

“I’m excited to play with Nanny Sydney,” you say, slightly louder than a whisper.

“You can do better than that, sweetie! I want to feel your excitement!”

The process repeats three more times, each time getting slightly louder.

You finally tell, surprising the other littles around you. Sydney grabs your hand, “great job, Joey! Now, what’s your favorite game?”

Sydney stayed glued your side the rest of your day, asking you questions about your current favorite games and activities, your favorite movies, and favorite snacks.

She never asked anything about your life before your regression. Nor did she ever mention your past relationship with her. Both of you knew the other remembered those days—and nights—you spent together. But it was left unsaid.

You were just starting to feel comfortable around Sydney, despite waddling around daycare in a t-shirt and exposed diaper, one you knew was getting heavier by the minute, when she asked you to come to her.

“I may be new here, mister, but I know a diaper that needs to be changed when I see it! Follow me while I get my supervisor.”

What followed was the most embarrassing diaper change of your life. Not only was your former girlfriend changing your diaper, but she was being trained as she did.

It wasn’t a quick diaper change. It was slow, methodical, and frequently interrupted by instructions and comments—and giggling.

“Make sure you wipe him well down there, Sydney! I know, that’s a side effect of regression, it’s perfectly normal! But don’t worry, he’s not able to get those anymore!” More giggles.

“You want to make sure you get powder everywhere, especially Joey’s bottom. He’s prone to rashes and his mother is very particular! Oh, you know her? Awww, that’s why you’re such fast friends!” Cue the giggles.

Later that night—evening, really—you lay in your crib thinking about Nanny Sydney. You wonder how different your life would have been had you stayed with her.

“She’s not my Mommy! She’s my wife!”

“Awww, what a cutie you are! But your Mommy also thinks you’re a bit too…well, you shouldn’t be around the big kids, so I’m gonna take you to the nursery where you’ll fit right in!”

I look around at the room I’m apparently not ready for. If it weren’t for all the other “adults” toddling around—if anyone considers even them adults—it would be indistinguishable from an actual daycare.

It has it all: the large playmats with toys scattered around, colorful beanbag chairs, a table for snacks, cubbies for everyone, and an egregious amount of Sesame Street decorations.

And, in the middle of it all, a circle of Littles excitedly playing what looks like “Duck Duck Goose,” under the careful supervision of three workers.

In what world am I unable to handle this? I graduated college!

“But…why can’t I stay here? This is for babies! I can handle it!”

The daycare worker giggles in a “kids-say-the-darndest-things” type of way.

“Sweetie,” she sighs, like she’s explaining something so obvious it’s silly, “These are the big kids. They aren’t like you. Your Mommy said the Little’s Program™️ took your coordination and potty training—you’ll be much happier around Littles with the same…uh…abilities.”

Great. 

Not only am I trapped in daycare, legally unable to check myself out, but now I’m too little for a simple game of Duck Duck Goose?

And this girl, probably barely old enough to drink, thinks I belong in a nursery?

She grabs my hand and pulls me through the big kids, towards a door in the back.

The sign on the door says “suyNre.”

Well, that’s what it looks like to me. I may not be able to read anymore thanks to the Littles Program™️, but I can piece together what it probably says.

“Hey Mia,” the worker says as we enter the room, “We have a new friend! This little cutie is Timmy, and it’s his very first day here!”

There’s something familiar about Mia, but I can’t put my finger on it.

“Well hello, Timmy! It’s great to meet you!”

“H-hi…” I mumble, distracted by how radically different this room is.

This was an actual nursery.

Mia kneels down in front of me. “No need to be nervous, little one. You’ll have the best time with us, I promise!”

The other worker ruffles my hair. “Have fun, Timmy! I’ll come find you when your Mommy gets here!”

As she leaves, I get one last look at the big kids, laughing at their game, somehow wishing I could be there—it suddenly didn’t seem all that infantile.

Not compared to this room.

At least there weren’t oversized cribs out there. Or the lingering smell of baby powder and dirty diapers. And there definitely wasn’t a Little getting his diaper changed in the middle of the room.

“Earth to Timmy?”

“Wha? Oh, sorry…”

“You’re okay, hun. Were you looking at all your new friends?”

I was trying not to look at them, to be honest. Seeing the littles in onesies with diapers poofing out, happily playing on their tummies didn’t exactly make me feel better.

Especially when Mia thinks I belong with them.

“I-I guess..”

“Well, I know they’re always happy to make new friends! But first, let’s check that diapie of yours.”

Before I have time to react to “diapie,” Mia has unbuttoned my shorts and dropped them to my ankles.

“H-hey!”

Mia just smiles, sliding a finger into my diaper and running it all along the edge, checking for wetness like Sherlock Holmes.

“Sorry, hun, but this is the nursery. Nobody here is going to tease you for your diapers. Or for this diaper change. You’re soaked, mister.”

Mia flags down another worker, who grabs a spar diaper and changing supplies.

Mia pushes me to the floor. “Can you lie down for me, buddy? I promise I’ll be quick and you’ll be ready to play!”

I try not to look around, not wanting to know if this humiliating scene has an audience. Not when I’m in this position.

“Thanks, Susan,” Mia says, grabbing the supplies. Susan waves at me as she walks away.

Mia playfully pats my diaper before sliding my shirt past my belly button.

It’s all done so casually, so matter-of-factly. Like it’s just another diaper change.

I shudder at how normal this all is. 

As if I belong here, instead of work, where all my friends—my real friends—get to go. I wonder what they’d say if they saw me getting my diaper changed in the middle of the nursery like a baby.

Well, if they don’t already think I’m a baby. I push that thought away—one humiliation at a time.

And this diaper change is a far more pressing humiliation.

Luckily, Mia is brutally efficient with diaper changes. Wiping me down, lifting my legs, powdering me up like a professional.

Which, I guess she is.

She hums some sweet melody as she slides my next diaper under me. Though I can immediately tell this is no ordinary diaper.

As she tapes it up, the massive bulk is unmistakable. I can’t even put my legs together.

Mia laughs, watching me get used to my comically poofy diaper. “You’ll get used to it, we only use the very best diapers for our little ones—you’ll never get a rash on my watch!”

As if I’m worried about rashes—not how ridiculous I must look in this diaper. 

As I look down at my new diaper, I realize it’s not the bulk that’s most embarrassing, it’s seeing Elmo’s face and the silly stars staring back at me.

It even says Pampers on it, like it couldn’t get any worse.

“Can you stand up for me, Timmy?”

Gosh I hope so.

After a few attempts of wriggling my legs—and “supportive” giggles from Mia—I manage to get on my knees.

“Almost there! You can do it, champ!”

After a Herculean effort, I’m finally able to stand up, but I know there is no way I can walk in anything but a ridiculous waddle.

Just another thing to be embarrassed about.

“Alrighty, little one, let's get these shorts on you, huh?”

“Yes, please.”

Mia helps me balance as I step into my shorts, but it doesn’t take long to realize it’s not going to work.

“Uh oh! I don’t think these shorts will fit, hun.”

My mind races for a solution. Whatever it takes to get this diaper covered.

“C-can’t I just wear my normal diaper then? My shorts fit those!”

More giggling.

“Sorry, kiddo. All little ones in the nursery are required to wear these; it’s our policy. I’ll let your Mommy know for tomorrow, how does that sound?”

It does not sound good at all, thank you.

“NO!” I shout, “I won’t!”

I don’t even care how I sound, I won’t waddle around all day with nothing covering my diaper.

Enough is enough!

To my surprise, Mia’s arms envelop me in a big hug. “Shhh, shh, it’s okay, Tim—I mean Timmy—you’re having some big feelings. We can work on them together.”

I stop squirming, but not because of the hug. There’s something…right about the way she said Tim. And the perfume that smells strangely familiar.

“Good boy,” she coos, rubbing my back, “Just breathe for me, honey.”

Mia holds me for another minute or two before kneeling in front of me. “How about this, kiddo…it’s just about nap time. While you drift through dreamland, I’ll do my best find something that will cover your diapie. Does that sound good?”

“M…mhm…”

I don’t much like the idea of a nap, but at least I’ll have a blanket to cover me.

“There’s my brave boy!”

She takes my hand and walks me ever so slowly—it’s nearly impossible to walk in this diaper—to my crib.

“You’ll feel sooo much better after a nap, little one. You’ve had a big day, your little noggin needs a rest.”

I look around and see the same process happening to other littles, smiling as they’re tucked in.

“There you go, honey,” Mia coos, pressing my diaper to help me up. 

Mia grabs a blanket and expertly wraps me in it. Before I realize whats happening she’s done.

She just swaddled me.

I can’t move at all, trapped in my blanket like a baby, unable to even move my hands.

She clearly is an expert. 

I look up at her, feeling smaller than ever before but only see her smiling down at me.

She leans down and kisses my forehead. “Sleep tight, Timmy. I’ll be right here when you wake up with a warm baba of milkies.”

Soon, when all the other littles are tucked in, the lights dim and gentle music plays in the background. I barely even notice the littles in the other room playing.

Despite fighting with all my strength, I can feel my eyes growing heavy. But I won’t go down for a nap like some stupid baby!

Especially not when I’m swaddled! I’m an adult! Just cause my wife sent me to some stupid clinic doesn’t change that!

Yet my eyes shut anyway. My thoughts slowing. 

The last thing I remember before I fall asleep is Mia—an epiphany that’s lost as as soon as the world fades away and I’m no different from any other little taking their nap.