flight of the navigator

Y’know, after not working for so long then getting back into everything – I’ve realized that I miss being able to just not do anything all day and just watch Law & Order: SVU re-runs and not actually have to make myself presentable. Yes, I know this makes me sound like the laziest person ever, but I just got so comfortable on my couch – like we really just became one and now that we’re so far away, I miss it more than anything. Has this happened to anyone else? No? Just me? Totally understandable. @hollywoodlegacystarters

Couch days are very important. I soak that shit up. You have to. You’d go crazy being constantly busy, so a day on the couch is definitely necessary. Even though your schedule is picking up, I’m sure you’ll find days in between to veg out on the couch. When you really, really want something, you always find a way. You’ll find your way back to that couch and I have no doubt that they will still be running Law & Order re-runs when you get there.

alright…i’m typically not the kind of person who plans too far ahead— life is unpredictable and all that; but the live action version of the lion king comes out a day before my birthday, and i need someone to come see this film with me. it is, hands down, my favorite movie of all time, and i may need someone there for emotional support with a box of tissues in hand. any volunteers to wipe my tears? i’ll pay you with twizzlers and all the popcorn you can handle. // @hollywoodlegancystarters

I genuinely hope they do not ruin this movie for you because I don’t think I’ve met anyone as excited to see it. I can offer some emotional support in the form of phone call therapy after its digested that it's probably not better than the original, but you have a newfound appreciation for it in its own way. Really though, I do hope you enjoy it when you see it because it’s always nice to see people like us striving to see the art that’s being made. We all got a love for it and that love should never die just because we’re busy, y’know?

Oh my God you know for a fact that I’d wear that shirt everywhere. All day, all night. I might need a couple or it’ll start to smell a bit. You shouldn’t have admitted that but I’m not going to tell anyone. Your secret’s safe with me, I’ve definitely gone a gross amount of time without a shower before. You’re not afraid - but I’m afraid of testing you. Therefore I’ll behave myself.

Well, you can wash it at night so you can wear it in the morning. Maybe two; have them on a rotation type of thing. Then again, you’re one of the innovators of this thing. You can pretty much have whatever you want. I’m trusting you, Taylor! You better not tell anyone. You totally should be. I’m the scariest man on the planet. Obviously.

I agree. I don’t have that much pride in myself that it drove me nuts. I was right by the poster the whole time, I was like are you kidding me? It’s all good I don’t something cool to make up for it. Meeting you has been cool.

I don’t think I could’ve genuinely looked them in the eye and pretended to be my sister knowing there was a promo poster of my face right next to me. That’s just another level of oblivious. But, you clearly have a better and bigger heart than me, so you did the right thing. Thank you! Meeting you has been cool too. It’s always nice to find someone else that can relate to the struggle, as minor as it seems, y’know?

Because I didn’t want to text you that you know? Like it’s a weird thing that happens. Don’t be discouraged at all I didn’t even tell my husband this happened first. What’s FaceBook? I wouldn’t bug any one in the bathroom.

I think it would’ve been hilarious. Weird or not, I would’ve at least gotten a laugh out of it. I guess I feel a little better now knowing you didn’t tell him either. Is that a genuine question? I’m going to assume you’re joking. I never know with you. You have such a stoic face. Well, I hope not or else you’d be one big hypocrite... Not even if you saw your favorite celebrity ever?

It happens to more than I like to admit. She could it’s frightening. Oh good question. I don’t know.

No one’s judging you. Sweets are some of the greatest things about life; you just can’t stop eating them. We’ll see what happens. I definitely need to whip my ass into some shape if I’m still going to become a superhero, but the dream seems long dead now. So maybe I’ll just go back to my couch and be a little lazy.

i agree and i guess i’m just used to how it is in louisiana, and i lived in new york for a while but i don’t feel like it was as bad as it is in ohio with the constant changing weather. part of me wishes i got traded to a warm climate area but i’m excited to work with and play for the browns so imma just have to deal. it’s a real pleasure to meet you armie and i don’t know, you might be just as cool as me. i’m a big fan, not going to lie.

It’s definitely not as bad. New York is insane and definitely can’t make up its mind, but clearly Ohio has a whole ‘nother thing going on. It’ll still be good for you to expand your comfort zone and build up your resumé, in a sense. You’re a big fan?! That seems unrealistic. Stop lying to me, Odell. I can’t handle it. Looks like the feeling is totally mutual then. That definitely doesn’t mean I’m as cool as you.

currently in ohio and i swear i don’t get this state’s weather, one day it’s in the 80′s and i’m sweatin’ cause of the fuckin’ humidity. and the next day it’s in the 50′s and i’m freezin’ my balls off. i’ve never had that problem growing up in louisiana and even when i was livin’ in new york the weather didn’t mess me up this much. guess i gotta get use to it though, since imma be with the browns for the foreseeable future. but anyway, in case you don’t know who i am, i’m odell beckahm jr and i’m a wide receiver for the cleveland browns.

A lot of states in that region have committal issues, I think. They can’t decide what season it is, or if it’s sunny or raining. Everywhere I’ve ever lived typically stayed in the same temperature range, but it can get tricky when you’re traveling. You can leave a place that’s eighty and end up in a place that’s fifty, but having it all happen within an hour? That stuff can really break you down, man. Hey Odell, I'm Armie Hammer and I’m not nearly as cool as you.

You know I’m always up for autographs but not in the ladies room, not when I’ve just washed my hands and I’m just trying to leave the room. So my question is where’s the weirdest or oddest place that people have recognized you?

How come I didn’t get a text when this happened? I’m a little discouraged. I could’ve told you about the time someone recognized me as “the Facebook guy” when I was literally peeing. He then continued to smile at himself as if he discovered some sort of treasure and I never saw him again. People can be absolutely insane when it comes to meeting celebrities and like, I totally get it, but know your boundaries. If I saw Elton John in a bathroom, I definitely wouldn’t want to tell him that I admire his work while he was trying to take care of business, but that’s just me.

“Just have a fucking apple” is a whole mood, to be honest, and although I don’t always listen to my brain when it says that to me, I definitely appreciate it when I do. You gotta look after your kids but looking after yourself can feel like a chore, I’m sure. Okay, deal. No discussions about lime wedges anymore in this chat, it’s banned content. Strict penalties apply.

Should we get shirts made? We should totally get shirts made. Maybe it would motivate people to actually do it. “Put down the McDouble. Just have a fucking apple”. Looking after myself is totally a chore. I could probably go two weeks without showering. I shouldn’t have admitted that. Kind of gross, but you tend to forget about yourself when you’re making sure two children are living their best lives. I will kick from you this chat for the rest of your life if you so even suggest the mention of that fruit again, miss. Don’t test me. I’m not afraid.

It’s okay that kind of paved the way for the name Olsen to be more known? I suppose? I said thank you and I said I’ll tell Bob you liked the show and then walked out. I was like really? And to top it off I was standing next to a Marvel poster with my face on it sure my hair was different but not that different.

I mean, totally understandable, but still a bit of an ego deflator. It’s probably just a pride thing on my end. Really? You were right next to a poster? I don’t understand how anyone could be that oblivious, but I guess people continue to surprise me every day. I really hope something much cooler happens to make up for that mishap. I know my ego would definitely be damaged after that one.

so do I have a bit of a habit of foot in mouth sorry about that. She’s a beast who can smell chocolate on your breath a mile away so be careful with the sweets. 

It happens to the best of us, right? I don’t doubt that for a second. She could probably tell the moment I walk in the door. The trick is: is it me who smells like chocolate, or is it because my kids ate it in the car? I’m pretty good about these things, so if I get yelled at, it’ll definitely be for something else.

Yes, make sure the backgrounds are on point. Make sure all the pictures are conceivable. This has to be the absolute bomb. This dream will come true. Definitely not. Who would? Like hey we’re new here and this is now our shit. Hahha, I’ve been recruiting a lot. I think we’ve got a good twenty people now. We’ll definitely need more though. Hahah, very clever pun.

Are you kidding? Of course. That clipart is going to the absolute bomb. Exactly. We don’t want to piss anyone off, just slowly sneak into their bedrooms at night while they’re sleeping and take them hostage so they’ll just give us Atlantis. Or, even better, convince everyone to come to New Atlantis and let them start the war. We can’t look like the bad guys here. Twenty is a damn good number. We’re going places. I’m surprised you didn’t yell at me for such a dad-like-pun. I guess this king and queen thing will work out well.

we just wrapped season two of 9-1-1 and i suddenly have all of this free time on my hands and no idea how i’m meant to spend it. i could do the usual vacation thing, but i want to think outside the box a little bit. so if you have any ideas then feel free to send them my way. i’m open to all suggestions.

I wish I could help you out, man. I mean, why not do something you’ve always wanted to, but never had the time? That sounds super cheesy. You could learn how to cook something you’ve always wanted, or read a book that’s been waiting on the shelf. I legitimately never know what to do when I have a bit of downtime. Go for a walk? Yoga? Yeah, I’m not helping.