CHARLES.
you’re welcome. anything i can do to help out a pretty face, grande. you should know this. i’m the ariana grande video boy, i don’t think you can be a bigger stan than me. you are unpredictable, but you’ve got your moments. besides, i like being kept on my toes. you wouldn’t do that to me. i’m calling your bluff right now. you don’t want me to cry, do you ? i’m a thespian, i can cry on the SPOT. so i might as well just wear a paper bag over my head to spare myself. if looks can kill, ariana, i’m sure you would’ve done in a solid number of people by now. four glasses ? i guess that isn’t too bad for someone as tiny as you. the gym life is a demanding, demanding time. meal planning, protein shakes. the whole nine yards. nothing like when i was playing ball in college, though. those workouts nearly killed me. why not ? if you and the person you’re with are feeling it… why deprive yourself of that ? i’m not saying fuck any guy that looks twice at you, but you shouldn’t hold back if there’s something you want. i’m a capricorn, ariana, i got a love hate relationship with myself. it just depends on the time of day. ariana grande without music is like… shakespeare without drama. just doesn’t work. i’m not tired of you, and anyone who is ? they just can’t handle you. and that’s their loss, you know ? of course. i’d be offended if you weren’t up there. okay, sure, there’s a fine line between obsession and jealously, but i like knowing what’s mine is mine. i don’t think that’s a bad thing. catch me and nonna spending all our time together now. would i ever disappoint you ?
this pretty face feels assisted, for sure. five stars for customer service. you know what, charles ? that’s a pretty good point. not that many men have that distinction, so, you should stan for life. oh, you do ? then i should probably keep this going forever. for science. you’d be surprised as to what i’m capable of, melton. but i’ll spare the tears, mostly cause i’d be there right with you. that’s not good. oh, stop. maybe two or three at best, yeah. now that my sad attempt is over, i can say that the ponytail definitely gives me some leverage. see ! just goes to show you can never judge a book by it’s cover, silly. i CAN hang. it’s ironic cause that’s the type of consistency that i’m looking for, but will stray away from anything heavier than me. think about a tiny, muscular chick just belting out notes from her washboard abs. unsettling imagery. i don’t know, charles, anything with feelings involved automatically gets messy. like, off the rip. alright .. yeah, you’re right. if i want it, i should damn well have it. yikes, man. i’m a cancer, n’ even that’s something super relatable. how are you feeling right now then ? exactly ! fuck, finally, someone who understands how necessary this is for me. there’s a lot that comes with ariana grande actually, so at least they’re weedin’ themselves out. i’ll record the entire moment for our personal viewing pleasure. reassurance definitely goes a long way, yeah, i’ll give you that. talk about backstabbing at it’s finest, melton. this is wild. hm, i dunno. what do you think ?
