the steady breakdown of healthy communication in the roleplay community in the past six years is something that i often think is going to have to be addressed at some point if we want to continue to even have a functional community at all.Β i understand greatly that a lot of the toxic behavior,Β fandom purity culture,Β petty call outs and bullying etc.Β that went off the rails around 2016 has left damage on a lot of people.Β itβs fostered a sense of anxiety which has only grown with each year because,Β as a whole,Β tumblr can have the unfortunate affinity to nurse itβs anxiety and feed it which in turn can make us feed each otherβs anxiety.Β until itβs one big messy circle of us accidentally isolating and polarizing ourselves and each other.Β at some point,Β you have to be willing to step forward and take initiation to be part of the healing process in yourself and in your community.Β
most of us on here have anxiety and bad experiences.Β i am hard pressed to find someone who doesnβt have some kind of horror story.Β and while it is completely understandable for that to affect oneβs self worth or cast a shadow on future interactions,Β itβs unhealthy to never work through that.Β and itβs also incredibly counterintuitive to use it as a reason to no longer take initiative with ooc or ic interactions.Β that creates a whole community of people waiting for the other person to take the responsibility and do all the work to make them comfortable.Β this is a creative,Β interactive hobby.Β it has to be 50/50.Β you have to meet people half-way.Β and when someone does take initiative to meet you half-way first,Β you have to take your steps towards them too.Β
on that note,Β i really think we have to learn to communicate our needs and boundaries in a healthy way.Β you canβt have your boundaries respected until youβre willing to communicate them.Β iβm not talking about obvious things like harassment or manipulation etc.Β but the personal things that might make you suddenly decide to disengage with someone but you never communicated that was an issue and then expect them to not be confused or hurt or want to know whyβ itβs a really ridiculous culture cropping up in rpc.Β theΒ βyou donβt owe anyone anythingβ mentality gets really out of hand and out of context the longer this site continues.Β and it goes to foster the continuation of anxiety which makes people anxious during plotting,Β anxious to interact on the dash,Β anxious to send the wrong meme,Β anxious to talk about the wrong thing because at any minute it could have meant they did something that makes them lose a connection without knowing why.Β and without a chance to do better or simply accommodate each otherβs needs like you should in a normal,Β healthy friendship.Β Β
i honestly donβt know that this post will actually do anything.Β itβs probably for my catharsis and the 15 people who will like it and thatβs okay.Β but i really really hope somethingΒ someday makes this community start to repair the lines of communication and collectively learn to work through our anxiety together.Β Β cause at the end of the day pretty much anyΒ βbut what about X Y Z reasonβ for not meeting someone half-way is also the exact same reason several other people on your dash have for holding back.Β at some point,Β somethingβs gotta give.Β
blakekathryn
tangentwithtanner
