Incorrect Westeros quotes @aremixoficeandfire - Tumblr Blog

Asha: What kind of woman doesn't have an axe??

#Asha Greyjoy #aroiaf #source: Brooklyn nine nine #book canon

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Renly: Why do I have to write my vows? You're so much better with your feelings than I am! Loras: I'm giving you the big wedding you wanted, let me have this. Renly: Is it possible my feelings are a poem by Yeats? Loras: No. Renly: A sonnet by Shakespeare? Loras: I'm not listening anymore!

#Loras Tyrell #Renly Baratheon #source: grace and Frankie #aroiaf #book canon

Renly: Peer pressure me into going on a run. Guyard: Do it or you're straight. Renly: I said peer pressure, not THREATEN!

#Renly Baratheon #Guyard Morrigen #this is his own fault for having most of his friends be jocks #like committed ones not 'for fun' ones #aroiaf #book canon

Bran: I'm making Bronn the new Lord of the Reach! Blue Blooded Reach Nobles Planning a Rebellion: Put that THING back where it came from or so FUCKING help me!

#show canon #aroiaf #asoiaf #game of thrones #This isn't an incorrect quote #but it needs to be here all the same

Jon: When I first met you, I did not like you.

Theon: I'm aware of that.

Jon: But then you and I had some time together.

Theon: Uh-huh.

Jon: It did not get better.

#Jon Snow #Theon Greyjoy #aroiaf #book canon #asoiaf

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Ned Stark: I use my one braincell to love my children.

Tywin Lannister: I use my one braincell to advance the standing of my house.

Mace Tyrell: Rip to you but I can do both.

#Ned Stark #Tywin Lannister #Mace Tyrell

Tywin: Never yell at your children. Instead, take the time to calmly explain how much you regret your decision to become a parent.

#Tywin Lannister #aroiaf

Tywin: Am I a bad parent?

Tywin: …

Tywin: No. It is the children who are wrong.

#Tywin Lannister #aroiaf #source: The Simpsons

Renly: Do you want paella?

Loras, skeptical: YOU know how to make paella?

Renly: No, but I know how to make the restaurant make it and bring it over here.

Loras: *smiles* You're so powerful.

#Renly Baratheon #Loras Tyrell #lorenly #aroiaf #source: Grace and Frankie

Renly: Did you have to stab him?

Loras: You weren’t there. You didn’t hear what he said to me.

Renly: What did he say?

Loras: ‘What are you going to do, stab me?’

Renly: That’s fair.

#Renly Baratheon #Loras Tyrell #asoiaf #aroiaf #book canon #Lorenly

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Theon: So what, now I'm just supposed to do anything that Asha does? I mean, what if she jumped off a cliff?

Balon: If Asha were to jump off a cliff, she would have done her due diligence regarding the height of the cliff, the depth of the water, and the angle of entry, so yes, if you see Asha jump off a cliff, by all means, jump off a cliff.

Theon: You jump off a cliff.

Balon: Gladly. Provided Asha did first.

#Theon Greyjoy #Balon Greyjoy #aroiaf #asoiaf #book canon #Asha Greyjoy

Jon: This is so sad. Dareon, play Despacito.

#Jon Snow #book canon #Dareon #aroiaf #asoiaf

Asha: You're cute.

Qarl: *hisses*

#Asha Greyjoy #qarl the maid #asha/qarl #asoiaf #aroiaf #book canon #source: me and my boyfriend

Margaery poured salt in my coffee - I know she did. But I'm going to drink it anyways because I'm petty and I refuse to let her win.

Cersei Lannister

#Cersei Lannister #Margaery Tyrell #modern au because why not #book canon #aroiaf

Dany: I'm Daenerys Stormborn, of the House Targaryen, the Unburnt, Khaleesi of the Great Grass Sea, Queen of Meereen, Queen of the Andals, the Rhoynar, and the First Men, Lady of the Seven Kingdoms and Protector of the Realm, Breaker of Chains and Mother of Dragons, and this is Yara. She's my ex-girlfriend.

Yara: I'm her wife.

#daenerys targaryen #yara greyjoy #Yara/Daenerys #show canon #aroiaf

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(Robb has found out Theon and Sansa are dating)

Robb: *angry* My best friend and my little sister!

Theon: We love each other.

Robb: *fondly* My best friend and my little sister!

#Robb Stark #Theon Greyjoy #Source: Friends #Theonsa #Sansa Stark #book canon #she said because she is basing this off the book characters #aroiaf

You think that disapproving glare works on me after all the times I've seen it?

Arianne to Doran.

#Arianne Martell #Doran Martell #Source: Brooklyn 99 #aroiaf #book canon #oh ari #he means well

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