I have a silvergifting addiction

given i now have several hundred posts and theyre theoretically tagged well enough to be sortable

It is I, the most anxious of crystals, the tensest of gemstones. Behold! My stuff. The vibes are "let's collar Sauron like the dogboy he is" and "weird inverted power dynamics."

one zillion links below

welcome to the inside of annatar's head! we're having a bad time in here! <3

One night, Celebrimbor catches Mairon coming in to watch him sleep. He almost leaves again when he realizes Celebrimbor’s awake, but he asks to fall asleep in Mairon's arms, which is, as per usual, an irresistible prospect.

Once they’re situated in bed, lying down with Celebrimbor’s head on Annatar’s shoulder so he can’t escape, Celebrimbor springs his trap. He asks, “Why have you been so cagey lately?”

...Mairon had hoped he hadn't noticed. It isn't - reasonable. Celebrimbor allows him a thousand liberties; the lack of a single one should not grate on him so.

"You know we’re married, right?” teases Celebrimbor. “I can tell when you’re around. And I can also tell when you mysteriously have somewhere else to be every time I notice that you’re around.”

This is – true. Unfortunately. The unfortunate part is not that they're married, of course, their marriage is Mairon's highest priority, but that Celebrimbor can know so much about him. Mairon quite enjoys the reverse, though, so he will live with it. "I'm aware of that, yes," he admits.

“So what is it? What do you want?”

Mairon says, wishing he'd just leave it alone, "Nothing. It's fine."

“Sure, it’s fine," Celebrimbor says, with no sign of leaving it alone, "but you’re not being this weird because you don’t want anything. I’m not going to be angry with you, you know.”

How would he possibly know that? He doesn't - Mairon knows that Celebrimbor doesn't want this, that it violates the terms of their agreement, that he cannot ask for it. "Are you sure about that?"

Celebrimbor pushes himself up on his elbows to look Mairon in the eyes like Mairon is being deliberately obtuse. “That I won’t be angry about you asking me for something? Pretty damn sure, yes," he says, but he can't know that–

There isn't any point in speculation, but Turukano's mind worries the question smooth over the course of the interminable minutes between the first word of Laurefindele's arrival and his reaching the Tower of the King.

And therefore I have come to the only logical conclusion, which is that the lenses themselves are shaped differently, possibly also with gaudy colours. What sort of differently, you ask? '90s bowling alley carpet wet dreams! One of the lenses is shaped like a cartoon daisy and the other is shaped like a cartoon heart! They have colourful squiggles that move around! They glow under uv light! There's another pair shaped like a five pointed star and a three dimensional rose! Celebrimbor has a pair with a penis on one side and a perfectly regular round lens on the other

the stupid-looking spectacles are like. they're highly specialized lenses, so they are ground to strange shapes -- like maybe thinner in the center and like half an inch thick round the edges -- and possibly. like you know the thing at the eye doctor where they flip seventeen different lenses up and down and ask you which ones are easier to see through? several swappable lenses like that. for looking at different wavelengths or whatever.

two months later...

OK here they are i DO like my own writing it's FINE

Divine and Intimate Mysteries aka "vivisecting your maia boyfriend" has got to be on here. Silvergifting, consensual vivisection and assorted other Mad Science. The podfic is an hour long but it came out soooo well

Also required is my monster podfic project, Your shadow rising to meet you. @chthonion got me possessed by all these fuckin guys so I'm inflicting them on everyone else. Harrowing 14 is my favorite chapter so far, although we are going to meet Fingon soon and he might win out over even the card game

A Major Diplomatic Incident, Elrond experiencing my unhinged silvergifting au. Maglor is also there. He's definitely doing fine don't worry about him

An older one, Doctor's Appointments, Wen Qing/Jiang Cheng. Mad science mpreg babies before they even kiss. More consensual vivisection, due to my illnesses and perversions.

He set off toward the house. His workshop was a bit out of the way for a reason, of course, but it was a trifle annoying in this particular case, when his feet kept threatening to mutiny whenever he took his eyes off them.

Well, nothing for it but to keep trying, and hope to run into Nerdanel before any of the boys. They'd all worry, of course, but his wife would at least help troubleshoot first and fuss later.

HARROWING UPDATE BE UPON YE

no but you can have some tuesday afternoon if u want

"Sorry! Sorry," Nelyafinwë gasps, then forces himself to shut up before anything worse happens... but then, he was allowed to speak before, wasn't he? After a moment, he decides to try again. "Um. Does that mean -- no talking at all?"

"It can talk if it talks properly," Glómund says, as though his meaning is so obvious that saying it at all is a waste of time.

... What? "This isn't my first language, I'm not sure–"

An extremely unwise urge overtakes Nelyafinwë. He could resist it. And perhaps he should, but no matter what kind of reaction he gets, it will teach him something useful. As Glómund turns away, he says, "I'm sorry, I don't know – how you would have me address you."

Annatar’s eyes are closed. Really, he looks more likely to burst into tears than to start murdering people. Slowly, he sits up and turns away with his fists clenched, all the lights in the room flaring erratically as he fights his own temper.

Celebrimbor breathes. His cheek hurts. His whole body is a lattice of pain, and it’s not the fun kind anymore. He flicks his ear, just a little bit, and brushing it against his hair feels like running it through a flame. He doesn’t know what to say, what will diffuse this mood Annatar is in and what will set it off again.

He's not sure what his own face is doing, much less whatever Annatar can see of his spirit; but when Annatar looks back and his eyes meet Celebrimbor's, that awful anger burning behind them--

Right.