crows and idiocracy

What the hell is a Stanley Cup

What’s it called like when you are the friend that like doesn’t have their shit together and is completely unhinged but also tells you to clean your room and be responsible and lectures you when you do something dumb

Nothing better than an espresso and a splash of cow’s juice to start your day the Continental way

"Si mañana soy yo, mamá, si mañana no vuelvo, destrúyelo todo. Si mañana me toca, quiero ser la última." "If tomorrow it's me, mom, if tomorrow I don't come back home, destroy it all. If tomorrow it's my turn, I want to be the last one" "Se domani sono io, mamma, se domani non rientro, distruggilo tutto. Se domani tocca a me, voglio essere l'ultima." "Si demain c'est moi, maman, si demain je ne rentre pas, détruis tout. Si demain c'est mon tour, je veux être la dernière." Cristina Torres Cáceres

Another shock I received in North America was discovering that y'all don't recycle. Like, the dorms only had a bin for plastic and that was it, and no-one was using it. Throwing everything together felt super wrong but there was no other option

The biggest mistake was teaching me statistics. Now every time I am presented with a survey I answer with one of the most extreme options to ensure that the results get completely fucked up by my outliers. Stay toxic ✨

I just realized that the translation for cottage cheese in Italian is literally "Milkflakes" and now I refuse to call it cottage cheese

Today *I* want to be THE mild inconvenience in someone else's life. For a change

How do I unset my Tumblr from Freedom Hours to military time? I am physically bothered by the AM-PM thing.

Patrick Bateman’s skincare routine sucks btw