I recently saw a tiktok discussing how important it is to ask your sexual partner(s) about their sexual health/history (good) but the influencer mentioned asking your partner what genitals they primarily have slept with. That part of the video seemed kinda icky to me as it is my perception that STIs/STDs donât discriminate and that the risk of getting certain things is the same regardless of what hardware youâre working with. Am I wrong to assume that, or are there different rates of transmission for different genitalia? The video was aimed at people with vaginas but it felt like covert transphobia and biphobia.
(Also how do you bring up sexual histories and stuff in casual spontaneous hookups with strangers?)
now, two things are true here.
the first is that your risk of getting different types of STIs does in fact vary, sometimes a lot, depending on what kind of sex you're having and the the genitals of the people you're having it with.
people with vulvas, for example, are generally at lower risk of transmitting STIs between themselves, although I want to be clear that that's not the same as NO risk of transmission. people who parrot the idea that lesbians can't give each other STIs are a.) Wrong and b.) ignoring oral sex and c.) being transphobic. even if we intentionally limit the conversation to women with vulvas that's still overlooking the hardworking parasite trichomoniasis, the only STI that can and does spread through vulva-to-vulva contact. she's a girlboss, I love her.
in general, STI risks tend to be highest for people who are being penetrated with a penis orally, anally, or vaginally, particularly if their partner is ejaculating inside of them without protection. most STIs spread via bodily fluids, which means that the risks are naturally higher for people who are getting the fluids put directly into their bodies. there's a reason that the HIV/AIDS epidemic most visibly impacted gay men and sex workers, and why today the highest number of new HIV infections are found among women (specifically, mostly Black women). although again I want to be clear that this absolutely does not mean that anyone is "immune" to risks. the only people at absolutely 0 risk of STI transmission are people who aren't having sex and are perhaps living in a hermitage with no outside contact.
the other thing that's true is that that's a pretty invasive question to be asking, and I'm not really sure why that would be preferable to just asking someone about their sexual safety habits, their testing practices, and if they currently have any risks they may be aware of. as far as I'm concerned personally, the only person who needs to be grilling me about the details of my sex life that specifically is my gynecologist.
re: your last question, that's up to you. there's no singular "correct" way to have an interaction with another person. for people who are really invested in spontaneity, sometimes they answer is "they don't." lots of people enjoy hookups without going through a checklist of sexual health risks first and rely on a condom and maybe an STI test a few weeks later to suffice, and that's completely fine.
yousharknotpass
vaporwave
2087
gracieabrams
discoholicmusic
prguitarman
