Yea see, the problem is, with all the talk of âwe accept lgbt aces and aros!!!â and âwe only exclude cishet aces and aros!!!â is you canât really do either.
Iâm a bi trans aro. For my mental health and for my personal feeling of safety, I need somewhere to talk about and get support for ALL of my orientations. I need community that understands the intersection of all my identities. I need to be able to turn to people who are willing to help with my trans issues, my bi issues, and my aromantic issues.
If I am part of a community that actively says âwe donât have space for an a-spec community,â I am being excluded. My needs, and those of all the others like me, are being sacrificed in order to keep out (the actual minority of us) âcishetâ aces and aros.
If I am part of a community that insists my identity is âjust a modifier,â my orientation is being invalidated. If I am part of a community that says âaros face no real problems,â I am not going to receive the support I need. If I am part of a community that says first that âa-spec identities are all mental illnesses,â then say that my mental illness is not âallowedâ to affect my other identities, I am not safe. If I am part of a community that generalizes âall aces and arosâ as bad, and forcefully labels all aces and aros as âcishetâ I will never have equal respect as anyone else.
If I get told my aromanticism makes me inherently abusive and that my being aro inherently sexualizes everyone else, I will never be accepted into the community.
Please explain how I am welcome at all in the LGBT, as a bi trans aro. Please explain to me how this is supposed to ânot targetâ people like me, but âjust the cishets.â
Explain to me how I wouldnât be treated like a second class member if I am treated like one of my orientations is an embarrassment and that I donât deserve any support or community for it.
Cause either youâre that damn ignorant, or youâre lying our your asses as you knowingly and forcefully remove LGBT people from the only community they have.
