Dumb shit

I am constantly mourning the life I could have and the person I could be if I didn't live in an environment that won't allow me to heal

I would have loved you until my breathing stopped. I would have loved you until I had nothing left to give. I would have loved and loved and loved and loved.

I know staying offline and not saying anything to make people worry about you is a shitty move but God I’m so desperate. I want to see a sign that he cares about me. I WANT him to feel worried, I WANT him to feel bad and I want him to regret neglecting me. I want him to apologize, to ask me where I’ve been worriedly, so I can ignore that text too and make him feel worse. I love him so much, but I need him to hurt the way he makes me hurt.

𝑀𝑦 𝑑𝑒𝑎𝑟 𝐼 𝑠𝑖𝑚𝑝𝑙𝑦 𝑐𝑎𝑛𝑛𝑜𝑡 𝑒𝑚𝑝ℎ𝑎𝑠𝑖𝑠𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑠 𝑒𝑛𝑜𝑢𝑔ℎ — 𝐼 𝑤𝑎𝑛𝑡 𝑡𝑜 𝑀𝐴𝑅𝑅𝑌 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝐿𝐸𝐴𝑉𝐸 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑎𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑠𝑎𝑚𝑒 𝑡𝑖𝑚𝑒 . ♡

rb if you didn’t realize you had trauma until years after it happened

i told you I was mentally ill, Mary.

How can emptiness feel so heavy.

I’d like to erase my memory from ages 9-18