Annabelle Harker

yes. please just do it.

Okay okay I will!

THANK YOU

FINALLY.

All the exceptions I can think of aren't cis, apparently.

Save me I’m dying

I can’t believe all the inbreeding royalty involves. I heard a rumor that there was a royal family that had a son who got sick, and they dropped a teacup on his head to kill him. A TEACUP. That’s how messed up he was. I’m pretty sure that’s where they got the phrase “teacup dog”…

how does a simple teacup to the head kill a dude

How does a literal gunshot not kill the staff

What should I put in my dating profile? I feel like I should lie.

imagine having a dating profile

imagine staying single forever

imagine finding ghosts hot

Your species

someone is in the vents. theres a soft pitter-patter of steps coming from the vents, following them to the emergency wing. whoever it is hasn't decided to speak, but theyre clearly listening.

when they put their earphones back on, weaver continues through the vents to the surgery room, peering through the vent lid and watching silently. it was hoping it wouldnt be noticed, but if it was, anyone looking at the vent lid would just see 6 red eyes staring back at them — two with dilated pupils, two with constricted pupils, and two with no pupils at all.

they watch, silent, curious. they don't move just yet, waiting to see what the janitor does with the heart, six curious red eyes visible through the vent lid.

"ooh, who? im curious now, youve gotta tell me! or show me. either way." he hums, voice happy as if he wasnt actively blackmailing them.

"well, not only is my spouse an anomaly themselves, so I've done this before, but also I watched you put two hearts in your bag with nothing to keep them fresh and cold, naturally i had to go back to my crawlspace and grab a jar and some ice at the very least." he hums, not seeming to care that he just revealed the fact that his spouse is an anomaly — or that he even has a spouse in the first place, actually — and simply handing them the 2 jars, empty other than ice already in them to preserve the hearts.

"a month maybe. and yes, I have a spouse! you didnt have to ask that like its hard to believe..."

"i wont tell anyone."

Pls just say literally anything.

Idiot animals usually can't see how idiot they actually are. This is called effect Dunning-Kruger, because David Dunnign and Justin Kruger were the ones who discovered it. He saw something on the news: Some random guy (forgot his name) tried to assault a bank without any masks, in the morning. Was arrested in the same day, he couldn't understand how. He thought that if he used lemonade in his face, the cameras wouldn't see him, just like invisible ink in the paper. This made them think, and study about it. The coolest (I wouldn't say coolest, but—) part is that the more you know about something, the less you feel that you know (I think that I've made a grammar miatake here, having to write in english as a non-native sucks). This explains Socrates' mindset: "I only know that I know nothing."