Cat Detective's Complete History of Time @annethecatdetective - Tumblr Blog

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hellpatrells

--Sniper

goblinparty

Last night I was talking to my boyfriend, and I couldn’t think of the word ‘library’, so I said ‘book ranch’. He thought it was hilarious and started making up alternative names for ‘librarian’.

“Cowbook! Like cowboy! No…Readcher? Like Rancher? No, fuck this is hard…”

and just now I heard him yell “BOOKAROO” from the other end of the apartment in the most triumphant tone of voice i’ve ever heard

sasquapossum

“Howdy, pardner. Name’s Tex. Biblio Tex.”

certifiedlibraryposts

Certified Library Post

hiveswap

Everyone go look up the song nasa banned from space

hiveswap

Don't forget to play it loud as fuck

kowai-kabuki-tanuki

please….listen to the whole thing. And imagine that you are IN SPACE in 1973 and you JUST woke up. Every time you adjust…it escalates somehow.

This song had to be designed in a lab for the sole purpose of fucking with astronauts. whoever added it to the NASA playlist was a genius.

hiveswap

It took them two tries to ban it?

kvotheunkvothe

miggylol

Spin the wheel. That's who's trying to kill you.

Spin the wheel again. That’s who’s trying to protect you.

(If you have zero idea about a name you got, spin until you see someone you recognize.)

Are you safe?

Absolutely not. I'm dead. 100% dead.

I might stay alive, but it'll be a really close thing.

I'll take some hits, for certain, but I should be okay in the end.

A few attacks might get through, but nothing concerning.

The attacker might be able to get in one lucky hit. If that.

I am the opposite of worried. I'm 100% safe.

…Look. I've tried picturing this. But I honestly don't know how to answer.

Remaining time: 4 days 22 hours

(I've run this poll twice before, expanding it significantly for the second run. With about a year passed since that second run, I thought it was time to add another couple hundred names to the list and have another go.)

#I do not know enough about Winx Club to know how bad it is for me #if Stella Winx Club wants to kill me #Lucille Bluth from Arrested Development is trying to protect me which is straight up BAFFLING #I do not know what to do with this

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redscharlach

It has come to my attention that some of you have never seen what I firmly believe to be the greatest music video of all time: Bonnie Tyler’s Total Eclipse of the Heart. It is the perfect marriage of a galactically bombastic power ballad and a writhing mass of 1980s video clichés, thrown into the path of a wind machine and blasted down a moodily lit corridor into the realm of legend.

In case you’re wondering what the heck they were thinking of when they made it, I remember Bonnie once explaining on TV that it’s about the dreams of a headmaster’s daughter, hence all the boys in (and out of) uniform. In retrospect, the whole shebang is quite fascinatingly female gaze-y, and I’m pretty sure it was a major formative influence on my pubescent imagination.

And yes, there is also a very amusing literal version, but for my money, the original is definitely the most hilarious…

redscharlach

A sad and deeply fond farewell to Bonnie Tyler (1951–2026). May somersaulting ninja schoolboys sing you to your rest.

#PS anyone who prefers the Shrek version of 'Holding Out for a Hero' is my enemy #on this day especially #normally I would just say your opinions are bad but today I'll fight a bitch this one hurts #I also recommend 'Loving You is a Dirty Job (But Somebody's Got to Do It)' and 'Rebel Without a Clue'

prokopetz

Video game boss that's all bellowing bravado and big untargeted fuck-your-life attacks that hit half the arena, then for phase two they're like "hold up'' and put on a pair of ridiculously tiny glasses, and suddenly they're ten times as dangerous because now they can actually see what they're aiming at.

tmbgareok

I made this meme just now

.

softhag

not to suck my own dick or anything but i’m smart n cute n funny n deserve more than the bare minimum

thecommunityoftrustworthysinks

doc having been kidnapped and conscripted to build a nuke for libyan nationalists and building them "an empty bomb casing out of pinball machine parts" so they hunt him down to kill him has got to be like the most glossed over subplot in history

#TRULY #the number of people who treat this as a wacky misadventure he got himself into #and not CLEARLY a case of being put in a position against his will #like YEAH he's not going to tell his teenage boy best friend that he got kidnapped #but he went missing for a week without turning off his various automated systems that was not a CHOICE #the ONE time he's like 'oh I actually gotta be the adult here and NOT tell Marty about something traumatic that happened to me'#it does then go on to bite them in the ass

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measlyscrapofseafood

day one of having a fandom mutual: you like The Character too? no way!

day three hundred of having a fandom mutual: The Character probably gets vivisected recreationally. no doubt

laterkiss

worry about it kitten daddy fucked up

stella-draws-things

elismor

I thought about just tagging this 'nuff said, but it's not.

I want to say something to all of the women under 50 on this site. Ready? You do not have to be over 50 to start taking up space.

Can I make that blink? Is that a thing Tumblr can do? Because, seriously. The sooner you believe you are allowed to take up space, the better life will be.

drowsy-corpsegirl

The Dom should be praised too

drowsy-corpsegirl

Take care of your doms. Praise them. Make them feel cared for and loved. Or you don't deserve them.

drowsy-corpsegirl

This applies doubly, x10 tbh, to transfemme doms. You NEED to be nice to her, you NEED to let her know she is doing a good job. That transfemme dom might have a lot of issues with her self worth, she may have been used up and left a discarded husk so many times.

Sorry but I got sick of scrolling through the notes on this on desktop and seeing all the red usernames marked by shinigami eyes reblogging this.

I'm a transfemme dom and I'm proud of it. Take care of us. Love us.

drowsy-corpsegirl

And then no one reblogged this version

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