Cat Detective's Complete History of Time

You will not die at the hands of quicksand. Ask me how I know this

Please, how do you know this?

quicksand does not have any hands

Yesterday, I was at dinner with some friends and briefly forgot Harrison Ford’s name, but I was like, “His name is a president and a car,” which is how we got such acceptable alternatives as McKinley Camry, Van Buren Gremlin, Clinton Infinity, and Range Rover Cleveland.

Lincoln Lincoln

Hmm. My ceiling in my living room that I haven’t been in since Dashcon is collapsing and there is an alarming amount of mold. I believe something bad has occurred, I do not know what to do about this situation because it is not raccoon related.

side note, but i feel like this is a good example of how autism manifests in seemingly "low support needs" individuals. I can get a permit that is very hard to obtain, go to another country where nobody I work with speaks the language I do, hold myself together while I kneel beside a dead raccoon to try to determine cause of death, write reports for institutions to mitigate risk to raccoons, etc etc etc. but then the moment something like this happens I freeze up and curl in a ball and have no idea what to do because I have no money or skill to fix it myself and i'm scared of the textures. And also literally cannot speak on the phone ever.

we don’t have much but we have each other. and DAVID SUCHET’S POIROT !!!!!!!

i love intentionally ordered playlists i love albums with strong openers and closers and those told in two clear acts and albums with songs that flow into each other so you have to listen to them together i love interludes i love having an Experience with a whole body of work

to my dearest villainous kidnapping adulterous whore

Schmoedipus ah statement

john wick is weirdly cyberpunk for a series that isn't cyberpunk <- insane

cyberpunk is when there's guns and colorful lights

I'm gonna be honest 'cowboys were a sort of itinerant warrior class common in meiji-era texas' always annoys me a bit because it's a funny post but also No They Weren't. They were an itinerant pastoralist class common in Meiji-era Texas. And indeed the wider western region of post-Risorgimento America

I need to go to the seaside until I'm cured

actually think I just need 4 million quid

4 million quid can buy many seaside visits

read this as 4 million squid. which could also be found on a seaside visit