Synopsis: he was sick of being alone, he wanted you back, he wanted your love back so he played with fate
Peter Parker knew you believed in fate more than anything else, for you coincidences didn’t exist, for you everything was written, for you every single thing had a meaning
He remembers your days at high school when you would tell him that he could laugh if he wanted, but you and him were meant to be together since the day you opened your eyes, that the fac that he sat next to you in chem class on your first day wasn’t a coincidence at all
Of course he’d laugh, but deep down, he believed you were right,
Even more now, now that you have no idea who he was, now that you completely forgot about him just like the whole world did,
Nobody had any clue about who Peter Parker was
And the loneliness was becoming unbearable, he couldn’t sleep thinking about you, about what you two had
Before the spell cast, he made a promise, to both you and himself, he promised you that he’d come back, he’d make you remember
But unfortunately he never brought himself to do it
After Aunt May’s passing, he refused to get you involved in his life, he couldn’t bring himself to lose you twice
So instead of interacting with you, he checked on you, regularly
On socials, and in real life
He told himself it wasn’t weird, that he was just making sure you were alright from time to time
Until he realized that he unconsciously memorized your schedule more than his own,
That every evening he’d be at a roof, watching you from afar as you left your apartment to go to work, then come back home at exactly 9pm
That it was in fact a bit weird,
But he was eaten up by guilt, he wanted you god he wanted you, he wanted his girl back, his home, his everything
He just wanted to be held in your arms and just cry until no more tears could come out
He needed you, more than anything
It was a bad idea, god he knew that it was a real bad idea, he felt awful
But he wanted to be selfish for once, just this once, just for you
You were there, walking down the street holding in your hands few water packs, he couldn’t bring himself clearly see that you were struggling, it wasn’t really obvious but he knew you like the back of his hand
He knew that look on your eyes,
He thanked the universe for giving him such an opportunity to finally introduce himself,
Even if it hurts him to think that he has to pretend that he didn’t know you
Just like that, he pretended to notice you and slowly walked toward you, he couldn’t help the shaking of his hands
From excitement and anticipation, maybe a hint of fear too
“Excuse me-“ his words died in his throat when he saw you looking up at him, his eyes widening at the sight of you
Last time he saw you that close, it was five years ago when you were still a teenager
“Yes?” The slight confusion in your eyes made him snap out,
He had to fight the urge to just close up the distance and hug you tightly
“Y-you look like you need a hand…let me help you,” he finally managed to say, his lips forming a thin line
Your eyes soften a moment, you took few seconds to consider his offer “my apartment is a bit far I wouldn’t want to both-“ “no!” He worded it too quickly “I mean- I don’t really have anything to do so..”
You nod and hand him a pack “alright then! Thank you…?” he effortlessly held the water pack then paused a moment, he didn’t know if he should introduce himself with his real name,
He didn’t know if he could approach you again
“Peter, Peter Parker” he gave you a small hesitant smile
“Nice to meet you, Peter, I’m [name]”
His heart ached, he knew you, he knew your name, your favorite color, your favorite show, god he knew everything about you
“So..where do you live, [name]” he said giving you a smile and following you as you led the way
“About five blocks away” you explained looking at the man beside you, he looked cute
“That’s not that far” he replied giving you a small smile
“Mhm I just wanted to make sure you weren’t busy or anything, don’t like to bother people” your voice was music to his ears, he felt like crying by the familiarity of your discussion
“How can you bother me when I’m the one who offered to help you” his tiny chuckle made you smile,
“I really really hate bothering people” you insisted smiling as well
The rest of the walk to your home took place in small comfortable talks,
It wasn’t awkward or anything, it was just casual
He took a deep breath and told himself that it was worth it, that he was going to win you back, and who knows
Maybe your relationship will be even better than the old one
He tried to reassure himself as much as he could
Once arrive to your apartment, you let him in as he sets down the packs where you asked him to,
His gaze drifted up, taking a look at the small studio you lived in,
His heart ached at the nth time today, when he realized that he used to sneak in your teenage room, and now you have your very own apartment
The decoration was very minime but still very you,
He could see your favorite fluffy blanket on your couch, the small figurines you put on the shelves right under small pictures of you and your friends,
He paused at that, and took a look at each one
Pictures of you with Ned and MJ, pictures of you with your close friends, pictures of you with your family
He smiled his hand subconsciously reaching up to brush his finger against the picture of you Ned and MJ,
“Those are my high school friends” you explained from behind him “that’s Ned and MJ” you approached slightly
“They look…fun” he muttered
A chuckle escaped your lips “mhm! They are, we had the best days together” you explained a bit of nostalgia staining your words
“Are you…still friends?” He dared to ask
“Yeah, of course yeah” he observed your curved lips a moment, he loved the shade of whatever makeup you had on right now “it’s just that we grew up, we don’t have as much time as before to hang out” you explained softly
“Oh…sorry to hear that” he muttered stepping back from the wall where the pictures were settled on “it’s alright they’re still my very best friends” you smiled
He mirrored your smile, a deep sadness hiding behind it
He wondered how his life would have been if all that mess didn’t happen, if he would’ve been able to go to college, to grow up with his friends and you
You smile having not idea that his mind was tormented “it’s a bit late, are tou hungry?”
He snapped out of his thoughts and cleared his throat, he felt his checks burning a little “o- oh? Yeah yeah totally”
“Don’t get too excited, I’m just gonna make instant noodles” you started heading to the kitchen
“I like instant noodles” he followed close behind you
“Who doesn’t?” You replied looking over your shoulder at him “so, sir Parker would you allow me to thank you by blessing you with my incredibly tasty noodles?”
A laugh escaped form him -a genuine one- that he hadn’t been able to come out for the last five years
“I do accept the offer, lady [name]” the banter between you was so easy, it reminded him of why he loved you so much.
Few weeks passed since you two ‘met’ you exchanged your phone numbers and he found himself texting you quite often
He thanked your trust in fate for that, if you weren’t that superstitious you probably wouldn’t have let him in so quickly
You guys bonded well, and it conflicted his heart in a bitter mix of sadness and happiness
He still didn’t know if he was sure of what he was doing, he wanted you back, but if things got serious maybe this time he won’t be telling you about his double life
He’ll keep you safe this time, safe and away from danger
He knew if the old you heard about his decision you’d call him an idiot, a stupid stupid selfish idiot who can’t let her make her own choices
But he thinks he deserves to be selfish
The two of you were sitting on a roof in the middle of the night, the only source of light was provided by the infamous buildings lights of New York
Your gaze was focused on admiring the latter, completely unaware of the mesmerized eyes of the young man fixed on your side profile
“It’s so pretty, I didn’t know this spot existed” you murmured breaking the silence
“Yeah? I often come here when…it’s too much” he matched your tone, low and slow “really? It’s kinda hidden, how’d you find it?”
He smiled at you “it’s a secret,”
You chuckled “you’re so annoying” you joked
He hummed “i don’t think you’d be sitting with me right now if i was really annoying” he couldn’t hide his smile anymore
You glanced at him, finally blessing him with those beautiful eyes of yours “you’re right,” his hand reached out, his fingers gently brushing against a strand of your hair
A soft silence took place, rocked by the familiar sounds of cars and few voices that reached the top of the building
“You know ” you started “I’m grateful I met you” you murmured your eyes fixed on his “I…you just fit in my life so well, as if you were always here”
He almost flinched at your words, his heart was beating fast now, really fast
“I don’t know if I mentioned it before, but I strongly believe in fate, I believe that every single thing that happens has meaning” his hand found yours, squeezing it real tight “l think meeting you was faith”
He pulled you closer, pulling you in a tight hug “yeah…that was definitely fate” he murmured “I don’t know what I’d do without you…actually I don’t even want to imagine it”
His voice creaked, because he knew life without you, he knew it damn well. And he had no intention in living it another time
Your hugged him back, chuckling at his reaction
“I’m glad I met you too” he murmured holding you closer “I- you’re the first person I let in ever since my aunt passed” his voice was shaking “thank you,”
“For being here, for being you.”
“That’s so corny” you murmured laughing, he froze and buried his face further into your neck “stop! I thought we were confessing a-“
He got cut by his phone ringing, his wince it really wasn’t the moment
He pulled back babbling few excuses as he pull out his phone, it was a signal from the police chief, they needed Spider-Man
He looked at you, then down at his phone
You gave him a worried look “Peter? Is everything alright?”
“O- yeah yeah yeah! Everything’s perfect! But I’m so so sorry I have to go” you blink “what? Where?”
He sighed wincing “I have- something super duper important like-“ “at midnight?”
Your frown made his heart tighten “are you sure it’s not anything serious?” He shook his head standing up “no no no! Nothing for you to worry I just have to go now!”
He was about to jump off the roof when he remembered you didn’t know about Spiderman, you didn’t know the truth
He sighed and gave you his hand to help you stand up
He accompanied you on the stairs to the entrance of the building, he apologized a million times before he ran to the opposite of where he lived
You just looked at his back while he ran, that was…weird
And you weren’t even surprised, it happened a lot of times before
You sighed and headed home, your hands tucked in your pockets
You were a bit disappointed, you expected the night to go a bit further,
You wanted to confess tonight, but seems like Parker had other things to do
It hurt you a tiny bit, but you just sighed and brushed it off
The next morning, you woke up to about twenty messages from Peter,
From apologies to lame excuses
You believed that he was sorry, but those excuse he found just didn’t sound right, not right at all
But you just ignored it, maybe he had a personal issue or something
So you quickly texted back saying it was alright, that you weren’t mad, which was true
It was a bit late in the evening when you finally finished your shift at the part time job you had to help yourself on the rent
You walked out of there adjusting your shirt when you saw a familiar head of brown curls waiting for you right at the entrance
Your eyes widened a bit when you spotted him, you couldn’t help but fasten your steps to meet him, taking note of the bouquet of flowers he had in hand
He snapped out of his thoughts as he heard your voice, he immediately approached you smiled back at you
“There you are” he says stopping right in front of you
“Pretty flowers” you didn’t see his face yet, focused on the beautiful flowers he had “yeah? They’re for you, actually”
When he handed them to you, your heart swallowed with affection as you stepped forward to hug him tightly
“Thank you, they’re beautiful”
“Not as beau-“ “what’s that on your face?” Your frown made his words die in his mouth
Your hand immediately touched his bruised eye “Peter? What’s that?” You repeated the worry evident in your face
“I- it’s nothing really! I just fell the stairs an-“ he hissed when your finger pressed tighter against his bruised eye
“That doesn’t look like a fell Peter, did you get in a fight or something?” He sighed, louder than he intended to make it sound
“Please, it’s really nothing” his calloused fingers soothed the frown of your brows “don’t worry about it”
You sighed and looked at him
He just gave you a smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes
A lot of weird things started happening since then, or rather you started noticing them more than before
Anytime you’d hang out he’d randomly disappear out of nowhere
He’d just get those weird signals on his phone then poof! Not there anymore
You started having doubts
But you stayed quiet about it
If he had something to tell you, he would. Right?
When you arrived to his apartment the first thing you noticed was how many computers he had
You knew Peter was a genius, and you always thought it was such a waste that he dropped college, but you didn’t know more about it, and you didn’t really ask more about it
You looked around “whoa, that looks…expensive as hell”
He smiled “it was,” he confirmed
You wandered around his small studio, it was a bit of a mess, but you couldn’t expect less from Peter,
Peter offered you a pair of shorts and a big shirt of his to make you more comfortable, which you agreed to with no hesitation,
That’s how you ended up there
The comfort you felt right now was unexplainable, the feeling of the bed dipping down under your two weights combined
His strong arms around you,
The hushed words you shared
The fact that bed was supposed to serve a single body made the whole thing even more snuggly
“You look so pretty in my clothes” he murmured smiling, his cheeks slightly red
You were trapped between his body and the wall, your arms were wrapped securely around his waist while his own were holding you tightly against him
“I didn’t think your clothes would be so big on me” you murmured smiling
“Well, I’m not really lean you know”
Another chuckle escaped your lips as you tilted your head up to him “yeah I noticed”
“You sleepy?” He asked in a hushed voice
It made him smile “then sleep”
His forehead gently rest against yours, shutting his own eyes as he took you in,
Then he remembered, he remembered the sleepless nights he spent here alone, the tears he cried because of how heavy his loneliness had been
With the love of his life, in bed, cuddling
He held you tight against him
Then again, his phone rings
You both sigh at the sound, both knowing it meant he had to go
You frown a bit looking up at him
“Peter, don’t tell me you’re really leaving” you sit up slightly on the bed
“Why the hell do you have to? It can’t wait till tomorrow?” Your frown made his heart ache
“I’m really sorry, but it’s urgent” he quickly got up from the bed “just stay here alright? I’ll be back soon”
You sigh and stood up as well
His eyes followed you “What are you doing?”
“What do you mean why Peter? I dont want to stay here waiting for you patiently while you’re out there doing god knows what!” Your tone made him wince
“Listen- I know! I know it’s very suspicious but trust me! It’s nothing weird” god he hates that look on your face
“Trust you? You’re not even telling me everything! Why would I trust you if you don’t!”
His heart sinks down his stomach, no, no no no he can’t lose you
“Please, I’m begging you just stay here, we’ll talk when I’m back okay?”
The trembling of his voice calmed you down, you look up at him still unconvinced
He stepped closer, holding you tight against his chest as his head dropped down on your shoulder
You didn’t hug him back, which made his chest hurt, but hey at least you’re not leaving
That was the most important,
And just like that, he pulled back, grabbed something you couldn’t quite identify before rushing out the apartment
You felt a frustration growing more and more in your chest
What was he hiding? Why couldn’t he share it?
You thought you two were close…you were just about to make things official
Why would he be acting like that?
A whole hour passed, then you got bored of your phone
You got up and started wandering around the apartment,
You stopped at his desk, and with a curious look you picked up a small familiar polaroid setting on the wood
It was a picture of you, one he took last week when you two went to the park together
You smiled, the thought of him keeping a picture of you there, where he could see you whenever he works on his nerdy shit
Your head tilts on the side when you picked up the piece of paper
You read the words there, recognizing Peter’s writing, you blink multiple times, rereading the same words over and over again, and your brain completely shuts down
Because I’m not just Peter Parker
And at the exact same moment, you heard the door opening
You looked up just to find him there, Peter
He looked sweaty, and pretty beaten up which only confirmed what you just read
“[name]? God don’t tell me she left” he muttered then froze when he saw you
“Explain what? That you’re Spiderman?! That everytime you left me there alone you were out there fighting psychopaths!” You snapped
You took a deep breath, surprisingly you were kind of expecting it,
“Okay, okay alright” you sat down on the chair there “w- what do you mean I forgot everything? Please tell me” you muttered your voice shaky
“I-“ he shut his eyes a moment, then he approached you, kneeling down in front of the chair where you rested
His hands took yours, resting them on your laps
“Five years ago, an asshole revealed to the whole world my secret identity then you were in danger! Ned was in danger MJ was in danger aunt May was in danger so DR strange decided to cast a spell on everyone to forget who I am but I lot him to let you remember! But he just messed up I guess so no one knows who Peter Parker is”
He said all that in one single breath, his eyes grew teary as he kept going
“We were dating, I loved you- I love you! And you loved me! We were happy so so happy but then I made a huge mistake, I’m sorry” he explained breaking in sobs “I’m sorry…I love you I’m sorry”
Your own eyes grew teary at his words,
“Peter…why didn’t you just tell me” you muttered
“Aunt May…she died because of me- I didn’t- I can’t lose you too [name], you’re my everything I can’t-“ he sobbed even harder, his head dropping in your laps
“I had the right to know” you muttered your throat tightening
“I’m so sorry” he repeated again and again
“I love you” he muttered tilting his head up, his nose was red, his cheeks matching as his eyes were bloodshot
“I- I like you too Peter” you murmured “oh my god” you hugged him tightly “you’ve been alone all this time”
He sobbed and nodded against your stomach
“I’m so sorry” you muttered holding him “I’m here now…I’m here”
After you both calmed down, you found yourself in the bathroom patching him up,
You frown at his injuries
“How the fuck…” you muttered
“I was thrown at a building” he said shrugging, as if it was the most normal thing in the world
He gave you the tiniest smile
“I heal quicker too” he said a tiny spark in his eyes “tomorrow I’ll be fine”
“You have the exact same reactions as the first time, you know” he murmured
You blink at him “really?”
His hand reached up, gently brushing your cheek as he nodded “same words same everything”
You smile “it’s not fair”
He tilt his head curiously
“You know me better than I know you, it’s cheating”
That made him chuckle “yeah? Well now you have all the time in the world to get to know me” he said softly
You smile, and shyly he leaned closer, pressing a tender kiss on your lips
You shut your eyes, losing yourself in his lips, god he tasted just like you imagined
He tilts your head down, moving his lips along with yours, your hand grabbed his hair, making him hum
Maybe it was really fate after all.
A/n: IDK ABOUT THIS OKAY I rushed a bit but I was too impatient to post it cuz I love Peter sm AND I WAS SICK OF ONLY FINDING SMUT UGH
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