*/ REWIND THE CLOCK.

@anfrxctuous​ | Lyric Call

“There’s a burning in my pride, a nervous bleeding in my brain. An ounce of peace is all I want for you. Will you never call again?” 

A proud grin will form when he admits she spells his name correctly– names control more than realized, not like she can do anything with his, she’s not a witch. But, he can’t deny she’s not above sub-par. Or he can, but will know better than what he says. 

What he says doesn’t necessarily surprise her, it’s how easily he says it aloud. His arrogance only rivals another, a passing thought goes through her mind; will he be reshaped like he has, or will his arrogance bring him asunder like so many others? ; but she doesn’t say anything to hint at her thoughts. Instead, her words are tame, irritation smothered with understanding. 

“You have a lot to learn before adjusting to this realm, Rael.” His name falls freely from her mouth, partly due to the fact that he might become incised that a lowly human speaks his name at ease. “You should treat everyone with respect, especially since you are in a position where you’re surrounded by people.” 

                    ❝  you talk as if you believe I’m not of this realm.  ❞  a roll of his eyes  :  his home may be hidden,  but if he so desired he can drag her there  &  have her disappear from human memory for good.  although he won’t  ---  too many people would protest the action,  &  he doesn’t wish to be thrown into there again.  (  if you’re put back into probation  :  will you not be met with an onslaught of yet more memories  ?  are you willing to suffer that again  ?  just to avoid watching your brother  DIE  over  &  over,  you will behave  &  play nice with the little humans.  )

“….” Were they flashbacks? She knew exactly how painful those could be as she suffered from them nightly within her nightmares. The pain.. the agony.. every blow and touch she had ever received. The agony was excruciating. So, unable to do anything, she simply sat beside him. Her skirt flared out as she tucked her knees in; arms wrapping around and pulling her legs in close. Her chin rested on her bony knees and she looked ahead.  “Don’t hesitate to change your mind. If you think of anything.” They weren’t friends, she was aware of that, but it hurt her heart seeing him suffering before her. She truly wished she could do anything to help him out, but seeing as she couldn’t she at least cold offer him company. “In the mean time.. you don’t have to go through this alone. I’m here. At least.. At least you’re not alone.” She wouldn’t let him. Dez was certain he would probably lash out; shoo her away, but she wasn’t going to go anywhere. No way.. no how. She didn’t want him to suffer alone at all.  

                    STOP REMAINING BY HIS SIDE.  you are a cruel human,  he thinks,  voice does not allow words to be given breath   &  he is left to curl up even smaller,  hatred will be contained in his steady gaze,  but it is not directed at her.  it is directed at everyone. he opens his mouth to ask her  :  ask her why she stays,  but he will not give life to treacherous thoughts.

                              (  not all humans are the same.  you know this,            but foul memories always outweigh what good you may see.            they killed you  &  invaded your home,  so many times.  )

                                             ( … his brother must mean a lot to him … )  she blinks, then offers a smile. no sense in being unkind. it would not help the situation. yui was always taught to remain kind and forgiving, even when faced with coldness. she’s sure that she may not get along with him, but she certainly doesn’t wish to cause any unnecessary problems. “ your brother must be a magnificent person. you don’t have any other hobbies– like … maybe art or even music ? ”

“That’s what you say, but not all of you are in agreement, trust me I’ve seen it with my own eyes.” Something he wishes weren’t true since M is aware of how painful it was for their Lord, but even though they are different being Noble’s and humans had some similarities, even if they won’t accept it. “You have seen too much of the ugly side of humans, but have you taken the time to see the good that they are capable of doing as well?”

M-21 doesn't count himself as part of that ‘good’ side of humanity, but he would stand to protect the ones that are good. There are good people out there, he’s seen them too, but they go unnoticed compared to the others.

“Trust me I am, I’ll even jot it down in a journal or something to mark the moment if you want, after dinner of course.”

                    ❝  good  ?  ❞  recoils at the word  :  what good there is will be marred by the stain of them.  he does not understand why this one would say that.  he would surely know what humans have done to pollute whatever good still existed  &  it’s happened to such an extent that all they do is the same  :  worthless  &  futile.  there is no difference between them  (  &  goodness is all relative,  anyway  ).

                    ❝  even if i see the good,  I’ll refuse to acknowledge it.  what’s happened in the past makes it that way.  ❞  he’ll be aware of his own bias  &  will do nothing to fix it.  ❝  blame the humans.  I could be happy  &  frolicking in lukedonia if not for them.  ❞

Seeing the other in so much pain caused her grey eyes to widen and brought an intense feeling of surprise within her. Never had she expected the other to express such feelings of weakness in front of her. So even though he had commanded her to turn her head and glance away she could only continue to stare at the proud being in front of her. Her grey eyes once again taking upon every flicker that had been expressed before her in that observant way she was.  Instead of turning in fear, she sat down beside him, her expression almost softening towards him. “…Is there anything I can do to help?” They weren’t friends and it was likely he wouldn’t take her up on this offer, but that didn’t mean she would just forgo it either. Dez was a bleeding heart and if she could ease the suffering of even one individual.. Well, it wouldn’t make up for all the hurt and pain she had caused growing up, but it would at least be one person who wasn’t suffering even temporarily. “I know we’re not friends but.. I don’t mind. Maybe I can help you figure out what’s wrong.” 

                    he expects her to leave  ---  leave,  he wants to drive her away,  but the words will not flow out  &  instead he watches her sit  (  the  PAIN  is only getting worse,  &  he doesn’t know why the thoughts  &  memories invade his mind with such insistence  ).  red eyes will half-close,  almost as if he’ll relax in her presence  :  he is anything but,  on edge,  watching the human carefully.  she’s here to KILL  him,  he thinks.  just like all the others,  so fearful of the nobles because they are stronger.

                            (  but the nobles have not harmed them.  if they wish for             justification  ---  a reason to behave like this,  he will give it to them.  )

Biting her tongue, he doesn’t have to be so rude when she’s trying to help him! how did she get stuck babysitting him anyway, she puts on a smile, inhaling. “Most people’s real names don’t fit within the required field, so nicknames are shorter. It wasn’t a requirement, just a suggestion.” A sigh at the end of her words as she enters his name, buttons clicking on the controller. 

Rael… Such an interesting name. Too bad it is connected to him. “There. Did I spell it correctly? R-A-E-L.” She shouldn’t say something about his attitude, she’s trying really hard not to, but she can’t just let it go.  

“Are you going to speak to me like I’m a servant of yours the entire time we’re going to talk?” Anger wraps around her words as she squints at him. 

                             tongue will click,  clear displeasure marks countenance.  ❝  that is correct.  ❞  the question she poses will have him pause,  appalled at the very  IDEA  that he would have human servants  ---  he has no doubt they’d be incompetent  &  traitorous  (  just like the kind that invaded his home  &  killed him  &  his brother as well,  &  ruined everything he has  ).

sb : then why do u look like one

@anfrxctuous

❝ Rael Kertia. ❞

A hand lifts to lightly tap her chin. Contemplation evident on her countenance as her head tilts to the right. It was interesting to see, how the young noble has changed over the past few months. Before, a volatile youth yearning for the attention of Seira and approval of his brother, but now… did he seem more calm?

❝ Hm, you wear the attire of the protectors of the school. Could it be that you wish to be placed on active duty in this area, even after threat of the Union passes? ❞

                   ❝  lord.  ❞  the word will be framed  with a ponderous weight,  (  especially since the  lord may send him back to probation  )  but he’ll  bristle at the comparison between he  &  the  ---   humans.  regardless,  he’s to swallow down any  hatred before it may be vocalised.

A small smile is given, though he tries to cover it with a cough, imagining the other barging into His home out of all of them and saying something like ‘get out of the manor and live!’, it comical but he can also see it. There are times when M-21 does think that Rai needs to hear words such as those, not to get him upset or anything, but so he can see form another’s point of view that all we want for him is to be happy and that the burden he bears is not one that needs to be carried on his own. Not anymore at least. 

“Please do, we both know Frankenstein may not dare say something but there are times when he should listen to others as well, you know? There’s still so much of the world that you Noble’s don’t know about. It’s ugly, crazy, but it can also be nice and warm, so make sure he gets to see all of that even when we’re all gone.” he has to survive this war we’re all being dragged into by Union. Rael may have traveled, but he’s still so young and so much left to learn, the future [if he has one] will be an interesting one indeed.

“It’s funny how when we talk about something that we both agree on, chatting with you isn’t so bad.” he needed to get a tease in, he may regret it but at the same time not really. I’m not going to get soft or anything on them.

                    ❝  the nobles do not need to see more of the world,  ❞  a familiar look of revulsion at the very  IDEA  that he must see more marks his expression,  one that refuses to fade.  ❝  we know what you humans are  CAPABLE  of well enough.  ❞

                       the human should be pleased to chat with him,   as he so frames it.   for the likes of he to  DEIGN  to converse with  ---  (  they are not worthless,  the voice will scold him,  but he ignores it  )   ---   that human,  is one that should be told to his grandchildren.

@anfrxctuous​ | liked for a starter call “Rael.. Truly.. I haven’t seen you since you decided to double swat the fly. Anything else embarrassing you’ve done lately you feel like sharing?” Ooooh, she didn’t forget. She never would.

Eyebrows shoot up at the lack of anger in his voice. After the pause, she continues her instructions. “Well, now you get to set up your account, make an avatar of yourself.” This promises to be fun. “What name would you like your account to have? This name will represent you if you ever go online, or play with other people. Usually, it’s a nickname.” 

Too bad she can’t name him something like “mannerlessoaf” or “mrrudeface”, they’d be too on the nose for him. Besides, she likes living and shall not provoke him into a meaningless battle, purposely at least. 

                    ❝  why must I go by a nickname  ?  ❞  an under-current of loathing,  he’ll allow countenance to burn at the edges  &  comes close to unleashing in full.  but he’ll find himself chaining it down,  surprised this human remains alive.

                            but now this human  KNOWS,  can likely see it in his face. if it is not his countenance which gives it away, then it is because he is sitting on the ground, hidden from where most humans go, then a hand will rise to cover his mouth, as if he’ll be sick. the other goes to his stomach, to grab a wound that is not there.

                                     why does he not simply turn her away with the  POWER  he holds over a human’s mind ? his mind is too scattered to form it is what he thinks. --- in truth he knows he wants the company until his body is  HEALED,  &.  only then will he  WIPE  this from her mind. ( he doesn’t care about any tradition of protecting humans. )

                              ❝ what is wrong with me ? ❞ the question is posed quietly. it does not matter if she knows the answer or not --- he does not expect an intelligent answer.

                            ❝ why are you here ? ❞ words will spill out on their own  &.  he is too slow to reject them. so out they come, less aggressive than how he would greet a human, but perhaps slightly more than he should be towards a being older than he.

  “I’m sure it will.” M-21 agree’s, there’s a part of him that hopes he’s wrong but at the same time he isn’t. He’s human, somewhat human and he knows that his days are numbered so he’s hoping no one gets too attached to him. He can feel it, that his life will end on the battle field, but if he’s lucky and gets to live a long life until he’s old then he can count that as a win in his favor, but death will come and his only hope is that no one will feel at fault. I am breathing today, but who’s to say I’ll wake up tomorrow morning.

  “Still, while I can, I’ll enjoy myself in these small moments of tranquility. This is my life now, one that was gifted thanks to them both so if I don’t try and make the best of it that would be rude don’t you think?” He’s certain the other probably doesn’t even care, but it’s better to keep small chat going on occasion instead of the dead silence. He likes it sometimes, but not that much.

 “I just hope that if the time arrives when he has to go back, He won’t lock himself up again. I don’t know much, but I hope He continues to live the life he wished for. He deserves it after everything that’s happened, we can both agree on that don’t you think?”

                           the concept of being gifted a life will strike him as strange, to be expressed with his fingers twitching, but he’ll  RECOVER. knows instinctively this will not be something his current self can understand. all of it will be filed away for later, to think about ; he has no  IDEA  what the other’s fate will be, he realises, not for the first time, an uncomfortable thing to consider.

                          ❝ if he doesn’t  LIVE  the life he wishes to have, then I’ll  MAKE  him. ❞ bold words, especially when DIRECTED  at a being such as the noblesse. he does agree with the sentiment, doesn’t understand how one can  LOCK themselves up in such a manner. the years of probation was bad enough, but to willingly do so for hundreds of years ?