Andy Attempts OYNB

Last BS reading was, it seems, lower than my current average. >:-(

I really hoped I’d see some physical benefits from stopping drinking but, although I have to admit I feel generally better apart from my usual “bit of a cold” there doesn’t seem to be any measurable difference. I’m an impatient **** at the best of times so…

Anyway, quick recap of the weekend. Saturday, we went to Emma (step-daughter) and Mark (BF)’s for dinner, alright, takeaway and TV. Was pleasant enough and I managed to stay awake this time. No booze on offer, no temptations. They did make a remark that made us realise they were a bit miffed at the ecstatic reaction to Xmas with David and Leanne (which they were also at) compared to theirs. Oops. Will have to hesitate before any FB posts about Sunday, then.

Sunday - David’s fortieth birthday present, the WB Harry Potter studio tour. A great time had by all though I’m not sure two glasses of Butterbeer is on the recommended list for diabetics (see above). Onwards to dinner in Wickford (Mare e monti). Lovely food, service a bit stretched, it being Mothers Day). Present - Sue and I, Leanne and David, Milly, Ella and Maddy, Mark (step-son-in-law?), his fiancée, Tina, and their brand new daughter Darcie, and Siân (step-daughter-in-law). Realised that, apart from funerals, this is biggest family gathering I’ve been at since (thinks… …keeps thinking) erm, my cousin’s wedding? In nineteen-eighty-harumph? Oh wait - nieces’ christenings! They’re at Uni now… How things change when you’re not looking.

The relevance to this blog? Not high, but drink freely available. I wouldn’t have drunk more than 2 pints or 2-3 glasses, being driver, but didn’t miss it by not having any and feel relatively pleased with myself.

Good weekend so far, then Monday.

Bit of background: we have two rescue cats from Pussycat Lodge, a charity that Emma volunteers at. We also foster cats sometimes. These are the cats who are too old or infirm to make attractive pets so, if you look after them, PCLT will provide food and vet treatment etc. Our most recent cat, Martha, was an elderly, slightly deaf, slightly irritable, black, female aged about twelve. She had been acting odd recently, sleeping in her litter tray but had apparently returned to normal.

Then, Monday morning, we were watching TV and eating breakfast when Martha suddenly howled quite loudly then went back to sleep. We looked at each other - Yes we both heard it. Back to normal. Then she began doing it again at odd intervals. After a couple of hours of this we decided she most probably needed to see a vet. This was arranged hastily and off we went. After examining her the vet said she was i) rather older than previously estimated, and ii) “quite poorly”. She admitted Martha and said she’d be in touch when she had spoken to PCLT.

Emma then got through to us while we were out shopping and said “GET BACK THERE NOW!”. Bad news for Martha.

It was all over quite quickly.

We took the empty basket home and slumped in front of the TV.

The relevance, again? This is already a bad time of year for Sue (Whoooole different, long story) and she doesn’t need much to upset her at the best of times. I now feel slightly guilty at congratulating myself for continuing to resist the drink when, in fact, I should just be acting like a normal human being.

Realised late tonight that coming off alcohol (a depressant as we all know) is having a similar effect to coming off anti-depressants in my mood swings.May have to see the doctor for advice if nothing else. Meantime will search to see if anyone else has experienced same.

Today I was close to being chucked off site. Brian the Arsehole spotted that my trousers were a different shade of grey from my jacket. Apparently this matters more than security. When Garry described his meeting with him later I realised that my short temper hasn't improved with the lack of drink. Will have to investigate ways to improve my equanimity so I can last until June, when the permanent FM may take over.

...and I can remember when this was Peter Glaze’s catchphrase, too.

Nothing of note, just to say today is day 45 otherwise everyhing yesterday still true.

Ooh, halfway to my next target ☺. Little change from last post. Still morbidly obese and staying that way. Today is an extra day. You’d think it’d be a holiday or something that would let you do something useful. Only thing of note done since last time was to go to the National Memorial Arboretum. Main thing learnt - go when it’s warmer and bring cash! Well worth a return visit though.

No back-sliding; not much progress in anything else. However, not back at work until Sunday once this is over. CELEBRATE! <Stumbles slightly> Alcohol-free celebration? Hell, yeah!

Lots of mundane stuff to do whilst off but may try to get back to Bletchley Park, it’s been a while. Or maybe the National Memorial Arboretum if Sue and I can face the journey up there.

Happiness can exist only in acceptance.

Yesterday was mostly uneventful. I was pleased, in a quiet way, to have passed 30 days without incident. Sue was very unimpressed by a FB post I put up but I didn’t realise how much until later.

Anyway, hometime. Arrived at Liverpool Street and walked to the stairs at the end nearest my platforms. Looking down at the concourse - “Oh, shit, it’s busy. What’s up?”. Made my way to the Shenfield area where the screens informed us that the emergency services were at Romford and no trains were passing through. Likely to continue until 23:00, Make alternative arrangements.

Usual mixed feelings - “Poor soul. poor family. poor driver, Why do it during the rush hour?” TFL journey planner helpfully gives alternative of 2 1/4 hour bus ride involving 3 changes. No, thanks, I;d rather spend the night here.

About seven thirty the screens light up for three trains. “Wahey”. Get on the first to be told over the PA it’s not stopping between Romford and Shenfield. Get on the next, check the indicators “calling at blah, blah, Harold Wood”. That’ll do me. Sit on train which whizzes through HW and Brentwood, finally terminating at Shenfield. Mutter, mutter. Train I just got off is going back to LS, calling at all stations. Walk down to the front but an announcement says no trains are stopping until Chadwell Heath. Fuck! Huge minicab queue on way to bus stop. Check bus times. Check them again. No buses to HW till tomorrow? Seriously? Mutter, mutter minicab queue. Bright spot is that Shenfield is inordinately well served with minicabs. Get in one after 10-15 mins, home about nine. Only fifteen and a half hours since I left.

Sue isn’t “speaking” to me. Oookay, that’s going to wait until tomorrow.

What victory? I didn;t go for a drink or buy any on the way home. Went to bed, there is drink in the house.didn’t want any.