W A V E S

[ zepthan smith-gneist, cismale, he / him, orange ] hey have you seen TUCKER HAYWARD ? HE lets me borrow A PAGE OUT OF HIS WORN MOLESKINE DIARY. oh, you know them! they’re TWENTY THREE and they’ve been at Roy G. for THREE YEARS. They are known to be a total AQUARIUS. no wonder they’ve picked up the nickname AMBIVERT! i’m surprised you haven’t heard them blaring WHITE FERRARI BY FRANK OCEAN all night. they remind me of PASSING STREETLIGHTS AT 4AM ALONE IN YOUR CAR, CLENCHED JAWS, AND PENSIVE SILENCES . anyway, let me know if you see them ! 

— introducing . . . PARADOXICAL HUMAN BEING ,  𝐓𝐔𝐂𝐊𝐄𝐑 𝐇𝐀𝐘𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐃 :

a genuine smile spread across her face as the other walked further into the store. ‘ an insanely slow day. ’, lorraine sighed, burying her face into her hand for a moment. ‘ i literally got in today thinking i missed some holiday or something. i checked the open sign like five times. ’, lori explained while moving things around behind the counter. her blue eyes perked up before letting out a small laugh. ‘ oh my god ? no, i actually haven’t ! but, a carrot croissant does sound good. like a carrot cake, but in croissant form. ’, she then mimicked a chef’s kiss. ‘ but would people even buy it ?! ’

he smiles at her , slightly sympathetically .   “ do you have much longer to go ? of your shift ? “ he asks , trying to inject a bit of hopefulness in for her . he chuckles . “ the open sign is definitely present . it’s also not a public holiday that i’m aware of either . would it help if i ordered somethin’ ? i don’t mind what . surprise me . “ he says easily , lifting himself up to sit on the counter, as if a practiced move . tucker grins once again , glad that he seems to have perked up lori to some extent , and even made her laugh . he watches her move around the bakery with ease . “ oh hey , you got flour on you - “ tucker adds , pointing to his own forehead to demonstrate . “ as for if anybody would buy it . . i mean , maybe ? you could make it the blackboard special of the day , or something , right ? maybe people would get super curious and have no choice but to buy it . you could be known for your wacky ideas , and then you’ll forget allllll about little tucker hayward . “

“ good for you, tucker. you’re welcome to keep it. you know, free things are never truly FREE. it’s the first rule of business,” she notes as the corners of her lips twist upwards, and it almost sounds like she’s telling a joke. “not only are you a bad liar but you’re also illiterate. how charming, but anyways, no thank you. and i have no doubt. you should put that on a SHIRT. it might earn you a lot of money.”

“ uhhh , A LOT OF HOSTILITY over a free coffee . “ tucker notes , retreating his hand from where he was outstretching the coffee to her . “ i mean , i give people free shots all the time at the bar . its free for me , and free for them , and the business owner already has a shit ton of money  , so i don’t really care that it probably costs him . big businesses deserve to be humbled by being stolen from every now and then , in my opinion . “ he says , with a shrug , before looking at the cup again , with the starbucks logo on it . “ now as for the shirt idea , you might be onto something . is that your way of saying WE should go into business together ? “ tucker grins , slyly . 

sloane doesn’t hesitate to grab the extra coffee, leave it to her to order a scone and forget a coffee. she sniffed the lid’s sip hole as she listened to him continue. she let out a huff at his words, nodding her head, “ what you just said needs to be in a museum. or a chicken soup for the soul book. the beginning of a chapter, y’know ? do they still make those ? ” she thought out loud before taking a sip, “ if i’m being honest, i fucking hate lattes, but i’m not waiting in that long line.  so, thank you, my angel for today. ” now offering her scone, “ want a bite ? ”

“ thanks , i think so , too . i can be pretty prophetical and wise when i wanna be . “ tucker grins easily , in hopes that it will make her follow suit . he watches her sniff and examine the cup with amusement . “ why do you hate latte’s ? “ in tuckers opinion  - all coffee tastes the same . like coffee . he beams then , as she finally takes the coffee and seems slightly pleased . it feels like a win, and he’ll take it . “ your angel is honoured . “ tucker pretends to bow , humbly . he lights up at her offer . “ you really shouldn’t offer me food . it’s very nice of you ,  but i have the appetite of a pig . or so i’ve been told . “ he laughs , though , before breaking off a very tiny put of her scone , and eating it gratefully . “ see , this is how life should be . bartering . trading of goods . no more money . no more hoarding wealth . fuck jeff bezo’s , right ? “ 

Caroline laughed once again, fist bumping him as they began to walk towards the coffee shop he had come from. “I mean, you’re right. There’s just a specific word for it in German–then again, there’s a lot of specific words in German that don’t exist in English like that, I have come to learn.” Shrugging, Caroline brushed some blonde hair out of her face. “I have a YouTube channel,” she explained. “It’s new, but it’s doing well. I have a huge Instagram following so that helps.”

 “  there’s a lot of words in english that probably don’t translate over either . i read something recently talkin ‘ ‘bout how we’re the only language that has a word for something super stupid and specific . like being rick - rolled . “ he says , with a small laugh . “ a huge instagram following ? wow , should i ask for your autograph ? “ tucker teases . “ nah , that’s cool  , people got different interests everywhere . . . what sorta youtube channel is it ? “

“Oh, hell yeah,” Caroline laughed, shaking her head as she brushed her blonde hair out of her face. It was one of the many health problems that she had, and while she really could drink regular milk if she really wanted it, she knew the aftermath would not be pretty. “It causes… um… God what’s the English word?” she shook her head. “It’s durchfall. Bad shit, not pretty,” she closed her computer, putting it in her bag and shaking her head. “Just some editing, I really needed a break anyway,” she smirked at Tucker. “Lead the way.”

 “ respect . “ tucker holds up his fist for a bump . “ i mean , all shit is pretty gross  , right ? i’ve never heard of anyone taking a pretty shit . “ he isn’t entirely sure how they got onto this conversation , but also wholly accepts the blame that he brought them here . “  oh yeah ? editing what ? “ tucker asks curiously , tucking his hands into his sweatpants as they fall into step together . “ you must have a great attention span for that sorta stuff . i’m bad at sitting still for a while . “ he admits . university was a struggle at times , for that very reason . but he had professors who were understanding and let him walk , or bounce a ball at the same time . they understood he needed to keep his body moving , always flowing , in one way or another . 

she had been trying to go to sleep for the past hour or so. her shifts were usually in the morning so her sleep schedule was all out of whack. mavis grew frustrated as she kept rereading the same line in her romance novel. her mind as elsewhere- namely on the empty space besides her. no one occupied it anymore. she pulled her blankets closer. 

a notification brought her out of her misery. with a click glance she recognized the name, tucker. audibly scoffing, mavis set her phone down determined to ignore him and return to her book. however, after a few minutes (or was it seconds?), mavis grabbed her phone and simply responded to him with a thumbs up emoji. after cringing at that response, mavis set her book down and got out of bed. she pulled on a pair of pajama pants that were blue and had clouds on them, figuring that it didn’t really matter what she looked like to tucker.

exiting her apartment, mavis took the flight of stairs down to the next floor. it was becoming a common path for her whether she liked it or not.  mavis knocked on his door and waited with her arms crossed over her torso. when he opened the door, mavis narrowed her eyes as if she were mad. “is there a reason you’re interrupting my beauty sleep?”

he stares at his phone for so long , it feels like an eternity passes . he can hear the distant noise of his wall clock ticking along . another reminder that he sits and lives alone , alone , alone . ALWAYS ALONE . he sighs , putting his phone down and considering his other options . going out , but that requires making himself look slightly more presentable . maybe messaging another friend , but the chances of them being awake right now are nil . he runs a hand over his face , just as his phone buzzes . he tries not to jump at the motion , and instead unlocks his phone . 

immediately , he frowns . a thumbs up ? ‘ the fuck does that mean ?  ‘ he can’t help but type out . if it was anybody else , he probably wouldn’t care that they’d sent him such a lacklustre response to his own lacklustre initiation . but mavis has a way of consistently being someone who presses his buttons wrong . he waits a few more moments , waiting , and waiting . nothing else comes through . he sends ‘ ??? ‘ , but again , to nothing . no sign that she’s even seen it . “ fucking fuck . “ he murmurs aloud to himself , head lolling back against the couch . he wishes he could sleep , but honestly - working bar shifts means his sleeping pattern is permanently nocturnal almost . when he doesn’t work , he simply stays by himself , or maybe writes . any distraction will do , and usually - it’s mavis . 

the knock on his door startles him . he bolts upright , then to his feet , before slowly ambling over to the door . there’s some precaution there , wondering who would be knocking on his door right now . . until he swings it open , and of course . mavis . one side of his mouth immediately flicks up , into a telltale smirk . moments of sadness and loneliness from before are immediately forgotten . confidence and cockiness surrounds him yet again .  “ you’re the one who thumbs up’ed being awake . which is an utterly intolerable way of replyin’ to someone , by the way . “ he pushes his door open , a silent invitation for her . “ weird of you to come all the way downstairs just to tell me not to interrupt your sleeping . “

Caroline looked up from her computer when she heard noise, smiling as she saw Tucker. She stood, listening to him rambling on as she tilted her head and smiled adorably as per usual. She licked her lips, shaking her head. “I have a wicked intolerance to milk,” Caroline explained. “So unless that’s made with oat milk, I unfortunately cannot consume it. Unless you want me to, like, die.” She giggled. “But I’d happily take another oat milk latte if you’re feeling generous,” she said, definitely flirting.

 “ does it make you shit a heap ? “ tucker asks , gravely , and seriously . he’s always been strangely intrigued by lactose intolerant people . he can’t imagine that life for himself . he drinks chocolate milk , like the five year old he sometimes is , at any chance he can get . “ oh , i don’t want you to die . although , you do shit yourself if you die , apparently . “ he muses , with a shake of his head , putting the coffee cup down uselessly . “ going back to the same coffee store to pick up a third coffee  , this time with a pretty girl on my arm ? a strange power move . so , fuck yeah. “ he grins right back . “ didn’t mean to pull you away from whatever you’re doing on your computer there . “ tucker adds , glancing over to her screen , but not enough to pry or make anything out .

 “  look , i ordered a coffee , they made it wrong and fixed it - so now i got two coffees . and this one has your name on it ! “ tucker grins , before looking at the cup in question . “ actually it says ‘ fucker ‘ crossed out , then below it ‘ sorry my t’s look like f’s ‘ . “ he shrugs , before extending the coffee out . “ anyways , you want it ? it’s just a latte . no fancy stuff here . i’m a simple man . ass , boobs , coffee . the abc’s of my world , some might say . “ he’s JOKING ( kinda . not really . )  

open starter

𝐥𝐨𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧: the bakery 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 : late morning

the bakery was oddly slow for the day and slow days were the reason why lori went absolutely insane. she had just finished making another batch of croissants which meant her hair was every which way and there were flour streaks all over her face. before she could double check herself in the mirror she heard the ring of the door. lori made her way towards the front of the store to greet the new customer. her frantic face turned into a wide smile when she recognized a familiar face. ‘ hey ! what brings you in ?! ’, lori basically sang. 

 “ hey ! “ tucker grins back at lori , always finding her to be a warm blessing ( and not just because she works in a bakery ) . “ i was just walkin ‘ past . saw you here all by your lonesome and thought i’d say what’s up . “ he nods his head over to the very empty looking bakery . “ slow day ? “ tucker comments . he works at a bar , down the street , and it’s almost never slow - but too fast and quick all the time . he’s kinda glad for it , though , because it means shifts fly by faster than any other time . it also is hard , because he’s a night - shift person , so during the day , especially lately , he finds it hard to do anything with himself . “  . . do you ever just wanna like . . create something wild when you’re bored in here ? like a carrot croissant . or an avocado cake or somethin ‘ ? kinda gross , but  . . it’d maybe make the day more exciting in some way , huh ? “ 

  THE APARTMENT IS COLD and lonely . out of habit , tucker goes to text julian   . before that trickling in his stomach settles in again , just like it always does . dread . remembrance . for a brief moment , tucker simply stares at old texts from him and julian  ,before locking the screen and sighing . 

  he is here , and julian is elsewhere , and tucker is really feeling the absence of his best friend . he swallows , and leans his head back on the couch , where a dumb movie is playing in the background . the apartment feels too big , and too small . the space is all encompassing . finally  , tucker unlocks his phone again , his leg shaking up and down , up and down . he scrolls through his contacts . scrolls right past  ‘ hot girl from party ‘ and ‘ dude living in no 36 ‘ , until his finger finds exactly who he’s after . who he subconsciously   went to find after julian . someone he knows will always reply , and match his loneliness in what is now turning to be 1 in the morning . 

       mavis . 

it doesn’t make much sense , but neither does tucker , or any of his feelings . before he can even think too much - he’s shooting off a text . a simple  ( but effective ) ‘ u up ? ‘