Have my taxidermist put a smile on my face

man dont take this as some proud to be american thing cuz its very much not cuz i despise this country but i think its very weird how accepting a lot of europeans are of not being trusted or allowed to carry basic things like pocketknives or multitools on them, and the way a lot of people will rationalize it as like, if u want to carry these things you are dangerous is very weird to me

did he just die this got a lot of notes all of a sudden

“Put him on his knees give him something to believe in” has the exact same energy and depth of meaning as anything Hozier puts out on the regular but since it’s sung by Megan Thee Stallion no one takes it seriously. In this essay I will-

To flesh this out a little bit more: both Megan Thee Stallion and Hozier write and sing really sexual songs, but they’re different in that Hozier’s music is typically “let me worship you” while Megan’s is usually “I’m worshipping myself,” which makes all the difference because it’s an acceptance of power rather than the giving of it. He’s the sinner, she’s the saint. However, taking their difference in genres out of it, people don’t usually seem to take Megan Thee Stallion’s music seriously in comparison to Hozier because a) her lyrics are more overtly and blatantly sexual and b)she’s claiming her sexuality for herself, and that scares a lot of people. The secret, no-one-wants-to-talk-about reason is that she’s a confident black woman, which terrifies people way than sex does. In conclusion, Hozier and Megan Thee Stallion are two sides of the same poetic, sexual coin, but people just don’t want to admit it. Which is WHY a collaboration between Hozier and Megan would be so powerful that it would change the timeline as we know it yes I will elaborate 

Sure, other platforms may call them “followers” too, but only Tumblr can capture the feel of a faceless crowd of huddled masses trailing after you about a city block’s distance away, picking up pages of your diary or scrawlings that you drop on the ground as you walk along. Some of these people have been there for years. Some only joined the crowd last week. Collectively, the crowd is ancient and ageless. Who are they? What do they want from you? Nobody knows. Walk a little faster.

d) Gonzo is ADHD, and is answering Kermit’s question, then immediately asking him a question with no ties to to original question Kermit asked him

@maggs-is-a-muppet

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WikiHow said fuck blue lives

to lovely humans who were excluded from invitations, left behind when they tied their shoes, forced to walk in the grass when the sidewalk was full, spoken over when you tried to contribute, whispered about or laughed at, given the side eye when you tried to fit in... you are so worthy of love and I’m sorry people have convinced you otherwise. I promise that your people are out there - people who will see the side of you others ignore, people who share weird inside jokes with you, give you affectionate nicknames and go to museums or roadtrips with you and fulfil whatever idea of friendship you’ve always fantasized about. even if you feel like an empty shell of your former self because you’ve hidden yourself away due to shame, this exterior will melt when you accept yourself or let people in and you’ll realize there was nothing wrong with you all along. you have interesting things to say, you deserve new chances and beginnings, your heart is probably made of gold because you know what it’s like to be left out in the cold, and you have so much to give. you are so worthy and someone’s idea of a friend too, and I hope you receive lots of hugs in the future from yourself and others because you’re so lovable.