âI donât think theyâre all out front and center,â she said with a furrow of her brow. âI thinkâŚwell. I think Iâm in the same boat as you. Just because youâve got less than desirable qualities in there too, it doesnât detract from the overall package.â She wrinkled her nose, giving a brisk shake of her head. âThatâs like the worst phrasing, but you know what I mean.â Frowning again as Alyssa seemed to push the topic aside, Grace sighed, unsure of what to say. She didnât want to keep pushing, not really, but she also didnât want to just let this fall to the wayside either. She wanted to let Alyssa know that she was perfectly desirable in many ways, and to many different people. It seemed counterproductive to do that though, if Grace was the one wanting to date her. That seemed like a topic for another day. âNo,â she muttered, mostly to herself, âBut the point of a conversation can change.â Shaking her head, Grace set her jaw, moving in closer. âNo, I do need to apologize. Because instead of just talking to you like I should have, I did what I did. And sure, weâre both kind of at fault, I think, but that doesnât mean I donât owe you an apology.â Grace was a firm believer in owning her shit, and she wasnât about to let herself off the hook for this one. âBut listenâŚif you donât want to get serious with itâŚIâm okay with that, you know? Iâll need to take some time to kind of get myself in the headspace for it, but Iâm not going to be a dick about it either.â She held her hands up to silence her before Alyssa could interject. âI donât think thatâs whatâs going on here, butâŚI just want to reassure you of that. You can change your mind, or tell me no or whatever without fear of me turning into a huge ass.â Heaving a sigh, she nodded her head. âI thinkâŚI think thatâs a good plan though. Just toâŚto figure it out together. I thinkâŚI think we should make a deal to talk about it if anything bothers us, okay? LikeâŚright when it does.â
Generally speaking, Alyssa disagreed entirely about it, but she didnât really want to argue the point either with Grace. It was one of those things that they could talk in circles all day about, but probably wouldnât agree on. At least, not yet. Someday, it was possible, perhaps, that she would gain some self-confidence and really believe that Grace felt that way about her. âNo, it - the phrasing was...it was fine, just. I donât know. I guess I just donât feel like I have a lot to offer,â she shrugged, chewing at her lip. âIâm working on that, though. I am.â It was a long process that Alyssa had struggled with for years and she knew it was just a matter of finding a way to love and appreciate herself. Pursing her lips together, Alyssa nodded towards Grace. It was a mature way, she felt, to handle what had happened. Both of them were accepting partial responsibility and both of them, she hoped, wanted to move past it and correct the situation. âWell, that - thank you. I...apology accepted.â Much as Alyssa wanted to deny that Grace needed to apologize, sometimes she knew that it was best to just compromise and find a way to make things work out. The comment from Grace about Alyssa maybe not wanting to get serious had Alyssa about to interject immediately, her mouth opening to comment before Grace held up a hand. Alyssa let her head drop a bit, nodding slowly. âThat...no, yeah, it um. I do, you know...I do want this to become...something serious. Youâre...I just...I can see something here, I guess, um. And itâs...kind of scary and I...know that maybe sometimes Iâll screw up, but...I want to try. So, yeah, that...that sounds like a deal. Anything comes up, we just...be open and honest.â