"The Blackhole of aLy's Happiness "

I love tumblr more than IG bc IG feels like I’m posting looking for a job but on here it’s like I already lost the job and my wife and the house and I’m just sitting on the curb talking to myself

This actually means a lot to me because one of my wedding songs was "someone like u" and we watched 2002's Spider Man on a whim.

Ghosts are real but only if you don't believe in them. Aliens are real but only if you do believe in them. Ghost aliens are real if you do believe in living aliens but not ghosts OR by a kind of double negative thing where you DO believe in ghosts but NOT aliens. Send tweet

Frankensteins CAN be real but only if you believe in yourself and the power of education ❤️

I have a lot of pet peeves but I think the biggest one is when people say things like “oh it’s such a small town, only 35,000 people” like bitch my town has 200 people, you need to pick a new adjective 

According to Wikipedia, a small town is 1,000-20,000 people. So although you are correct in stating that 35,000 people is not a small town (it is a large town), you are incorrect in thinking that you live in a town. You live in a village. You are a villager.

I…… don’t know what to do with that information……a villager…

This is how 'straight' people in movies stare at their 'best friend'

Maybe quantum physics is different in a universe where a mob boss built a working supercollider that could create portals to other worlds in 2018

started playing control and the game was already fun but got infinitely more fun when they gave me the option to force throw objects. more games should let you obliterate someone with a coffee pot flying at mach fuck