idk whats going on

My "stay in bed all day" game too strong

in this farm we plant heart shaped strawberries

it’s…called your funny bone…

that gif tho 

It’s not a bone actually- it’s a nerve that is exposed, specifically the ulnar nerve. The reason it feels so weird to hit it is that it’s not designed to deliver pain signals, so when you hit it it just wiggs out and sends Garbage signals to the brain, and the brain is just like “uh, dude- Ulnar, what the hell is this garbage?? You’re supposed to curl a finger and a half, and move some muscles in the forearm, why are you sending me this crap? How am I supposed to make this into sensory output?” And the Ulnar nerve is just like “dude dude dude, brain- what the hell is going on?!?” And the brain goes- “idiot. Fine. You’re on fire, freezing and being electrocuted. Happy?” And the Ulnar goes “holy crap brain!! I’m on fire, freezing and being electrocuted! What am I going to do!!??!” And the brain says “you’re an idiot ulnar. A damn idiot.”

This is how human anatomy should be taught

be handed a letter by your maid, break the wax seal, read it with dawning understanding and then slowly look up into the middle-distance with an ominous smirk. order your carriage to be prepared at once. 

peeling a clementine is so easy. it comes so naturally. its inviting… the clementine WANTS to be peeled. its melancholic, sanguine… but an orange? whats an orange but a nuisance… the orange torments and mocks with its brute strength. it exists only to create chaos. next time you decide to indulge in a citrus delight, heed my word. choose the clementine 

my skills include reading an entire page of an academic text without absorbing a single word

it is unhealthy that i have been laughing at this for over three minutes