I had another tumblr for shit like this
This was supposed to be my more positive/light one
oop-..
But I feel like I once again needed an outlet I guess
Life has been drowning
Literally can’t trust anyone like most people who I thought was a friend, really aren’t. Even the people closest have done things that just feel like they disturb my peace, and on confrontation, make no changes to their behavior: they simply don’t care.
Not closing the conversation
Victimizing themselves
Gaslighting
Not paying on debt and blaming stupid shit that isn’t an excuse as confirmed by many others who have the same
Prioritizing other things and bullshitting to you at how important your “what is friendship?” is
People make time for what they want/care for.
And someone close to me is going through what can be a repeat of an unpleasant year…regarding health, under a lot of debt so doesn’t want to return to that scene.. I don’t know and feel helpless—I don’t know how to help and wish I can…but I’m clueless and I understand their POV but also….i’d rather not have them dying…
Feeling like I’m being held up by the throat right now
Suffocating
What can I do but also who is there to actually trust to confide
I don’t remember how to private this so whatever, here it is
Feels like you can see over the years life is tearing away at my once happy go lucky, bubbly, and wanting to motivate and inspire, self
Or wait, was that always just life anyway this whole time?
