You are asleep on the sofa, your head on my chest,
and I am looking at you the way I always do
when you cannot see meā
soft, unguarded,
the way love looks
when it is not performing.
My hand finds your hair.
I do not remember deciding to reach.
It is simply where it belongs,
threading through strands I have learned by heart,
the way water knows the shape of a riverbed,
the way a key knows the lock it was made for.
I ease through it. You sigh.
Your breath slows to match the rhythm of my hand,
and I think:Ā this is the centre.
Not the words I will say later,
not the vows we have made in daylight, but thisā
the wordless conversation of my fingers in your hair,
your body answering without waking,
yes, you, stay.
I'm yours,Ā I whisper,
becauseĀ you're mineĀ sounds like a cage
and this sounds like the door I leave open,
the hand I keep moving because it is the truest thing
I know how to do.
You murmur. Not words. Just sound.
Trust, maybe.
Or simply the body remembering,
before the mind,
that love does not always
arrive with thunder.
Sometimes it is this: my fingers in your hair,
the afternoon light slanting gold across us,
the quiet, stubborn fact of two people
who have learned to live for each other
in the small ways, the ways that do not ask
for applause, only continuation.
I do not stop. I will not stop.
Not until you wake and smile,
sleep-soft and certain,
and reach for my hand
to return the favour.
DAMN, YOU STOLE MY BREATH WITH THE BEAUTIFUL POEM!! PLEASE WARN ME NEXT TIME BEFORE SENDING?? šš /pos
I had to stop at every line to take it in and wrap my head around the meaning it carries so nonchalantly, so simply, so light, and still my breath hitches when I understand??
The second verse; imagine touching your partnerās head so many times, with so much attention and care, that you remember the shape of the strandsā you know, to get the feeling that you do?? And itās so natural to you, it couldnāt be any other way?? I melt,,, š
Third verse; āthe place where worry lives, where you hold tension like a fist you forget you have clenched.ā Ughhh, awww, fathom having someone who feels your worries and relieves them for you. This is the center, reading this makes me feel warm and loved, too š„ŗ
I love the feeling of loving someone when they donāt necessarily see or know, just loving because itās natural, because itās how you feel, because you do, and itās the best thing you could do,,, thank you for blessing my inbox with this poem! š„ŗš
ā¦
And congrats on the first entry for June! Yay! Youāre amazing, thank you so much, please never stop writing!!š
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"if some numbers from 1 to 32 are found in my ask box, I'll post that day's entry or tell about it if it's unpostable"
How about 10? :D
Hehe, hi, thanks a lot for the ask!! :D I love how you perfectly guessed the one parody poem entry, you must've sensed it x)
It's rewritten lyrics of the song The Silent Mutiny by Visions of Atlantis, exploring the idea of some coats being rollable: you can kinda roll them and put in the hood and it will hold itself like that. I did this with my coat that day and it seemed fun because I got āØa ballāØ, fun to the point I remembered this song and- ah. It's pointless to rationalize. Just enjoy
The prompts for that day are Smoke from @/come-what-may-challenge and Strive from @/zazuprompts. Smoke stands for smoke and mirrors (the lies about coats you've been living) and Strive is for the enlightened urge to get a ball x) don't ask
Thank you so much for playing along! The AO3 collection will be open indefinitely if you'd like to finish any prompts! Below the cut is the final list of all the words! See you next year!
Thanks so, so much for organising this, I had such a blast writing for this event! Looking forward to it next year! The format you've chosen is sooo good and inspiring, and I loved the designs, and I loved the primpts, and I loved the mood, and I loved this month so much!
The only recommendation for the next time is to have prompts in alt text or in the post somehow, as wi-fi problems led me to not loading the pic and not seeing the prompts multiple times, it was mildly irritating at the time (even if I still got them in the end!š)
But come on!! I had such a blast!! Should've reblogged more of the prompt cards to spread the word, but alas, that's on me, for the next time
Maybe i'll even post as I go next time š (nah, jk, writing for myself was too fun) But now May's over, if some numbers from 1 to 32 are found in my ask box, I'll post that day's entry or tell about it if it's unpostable; let's go guys x)
Results as I counted them (shoud've had a spread sheet to make it easier lol!):
32 prompts
30 entries (11+12, 31+32 are merged)
21 entries are in English and 10 are not (1 is mixed)
3 playlists, 1 prompt list, 2 poems, 1 parody poem, 1 list of words, 1 brain dump, 2 philosophy assignements, 1 set of headcanons, 1 finishing eight months old WIP šš, 4 translating a story to English, 2 unfinished short stories (1 having a charcter study as a resolution in the end), 1 Q&A type text, 1 drabble
ā and 9 short stories, versus 21 entries that are not quite short stories. Hm, I imagined it a little different, but you know what? Those 21 are awesome and I know I'll love rereading them one year from now, remembering how awesome this May was!
Yay! Yippee! š thanks for the challenge, it was immensely fun!
Thank you dear Pro @writingwithoutconfidence for tagging me!! :D Even though I never tell you if I'm writing something, you still assume I do, and well it's true this time :D
š Search for the given words in your story. If your story doesn't have a word, you can use a variation on it or a word with a similar meaning.
So fun!! Let's give it a shot!!
My words: Name, Warm, Gain, and True
I'm looking through an unfinished Long Good-bye, My Honey AU one-shot :D
Name:
"That's right. Vansheld the knight, the Bureau's second in command." He spoke that so calmly as if the sound of his name didn't make many nervous at best, mortified at worst.
Warm:
Her knees gave in. She'd have fallen if Vansheld hadn't caught her. She clung to his clothes and cried out through clanking teeth, "What are we doing? Do we need to go there?"
He put a hand on the back of her head and caressed her, his skin warm through the glove. "Hush, hush. What did you thought of that scared you so much?"Ā
Gain:
Rose leaned over to her. Rise looked her in the eyesāand screamed.Ā
Screamed once, twice, and couldn't let out the third scream because she didn't have breath for it. She jumped up to her feet and, upon gaining the higher ground, grabbed Rose's shoulders with resolveāshe did, and after that she let out a sound of something breaking in her chest. Her fingers were ice-cold.Ā
"Alone, I beg you, leave me alone!!" was another scream, hoarse and terrified.
True: didn't have that, surprisingly, but I had Real!
Right: neither the angels nor she, a ghost, needed to regard the matter. A few steps ahead Vansheld flew rather than walked, and when Uriel pushed Rose gently, she could too. Bushes and branches pulled back from her, forming a path, and it burnt to walk it as Rose would give up anything for a tiny bit of friction between herself and the real world.
No pressure tags!
@theramblingsofadork if you need some fun distraction š«
@justluchii š
@imjusta-frog PLEASE I need to read more of whatever you've got!!
@writingwithoutconfidence isn't it the type of game you can bounce back and forth, just with different words each time?
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so you can have Porch (Point + March), Apreriod (April + Period) or Day (Dot + May)
This is made for the very specific group of people that are looking for month-long challenges like Inktober/Writober no matter the month of the year (I am a part of this group)
Tag whatever you make with #points dots and periods, or #points dots and periods challenge, or both :)
My thoughts on how to do the challenge are below the cut, but you can have full creative freedom with this of course!
I don't actually expect anyone to do this challenge (even though it would be sick), I made it because I LOVE prompt challenges like that and wanted to try and make one myself!
Daily entries for this one can be simple 100-500 words writing/journaling exercises, because basing actual short stories on some of those seems difficult! The prompts in general are great because they spark your creativity and give your thoughts an unexpected direction, and this can be best explored in small free-form pieces :)
5th prompt is likeā¦ what if you had 2.5 cats? or only got 0.37 answers to a question you asked? Let your imagination wild
11th is about computers and 12th can be any date, or no date at all
And so on! Have fun! Find the most unique usage of the prompt! Skip or group prompts for less days! Ofc you can use any medium for this challenge, not just writing!
Damnā¦ i just looked it up and word commonly used in relation to big bang is point, not dotā¦ whatever, signing off
Feel free to choose the line that speaks to you the most and write a short story set into the world you imagined, or realize your idea in another preferred medium!
Summary: On a day off, Chef and Fondue set out to Shroom Cave for a little adventure just for the two of them.
rejoice @3-leaf-clover for i have finished the thing i promised you half a year ago! it was sitting in my notes almost finished all this time.
Yesterday the bistro was bursting with customers, celebrating the Second Princessās return. But still there was work for the heroes: guests talked about the devastation yet to be dealt with. After a good night sleep the most of the heroes left to help locals restore the village.Ā
For the first time in a very long while, no people seemed to be coming for lunch. The place went silent. Cream and Ćclair were taking a thousandth stroll around the bistro, and still they hadnāt ran out of things to talk about. Chef was sorting through the supplies. Fondue, who would usually sit in the dark corner of the kitchen, or help watch the fire, or hand over some ingredients, was now doing the accounting. It suited her more than the fighting.
āā¦money is looking good. We can remain closed for a day or two,ā the witch said, closing the book.Ā
Chef gave her a nod and pointed at almost empty shelves of food.
āā¦thatās right. We need to restock while weāve got timeā¦ You want to go with me? It might be dangerousā¦ Well, if youāre sureā¦ā
Shroom Cave welcomed the girls with thick, gloomy fog and distant splashes of dripping water. Everything smelled like cheese shrooms here, but Fondue walked straight to the place only she knew about to gather the best ones. She was clearly worried about Chefās safetyāit could be read in the way she would turn her head at whatever noise that reached her, the way she took Chefās hand after she had almost tripped, the way she took smaller and more frequent bites of her shroom snack. Chef had noticed a long time ago that not only Fondue preferred little snacks over full meals, but also that her mood affected how she ate: the more worried she was, the quicker she chewed on whatever she was holding.Ā
āā¦donāt be afraid. Monsters wonāt attack unless we disturb them...āĀ
As quiet and distant Fondueās voice was, Chef felt protected behind the walls of her friendās confidence and competenceānot one that came with training drills, but one that grew naturally as Fondue studied the world around her with child-like curiosity.
Chef got lost, if not enchanted, in her thoughts about Fondue, and slipped. The ground beneath betrayed her by going down and for a moment, the girl went weightless as she was falling in a dark, deep pit that marked the end of her journey.
āEntangling!ā Fondue cried out desperately from far above, and the movement stopped. Thick vines held Chef steadily, her back against the pit wall that was almost soft with all the moss that covered it. Fondue did something to ease the vinesā grip, and in a second Chef could breathe again.Ā
āā¦are you alright?ā
Chef squirmed between the vines, released her hand and showed a thumb up.Ā Ā Fondueās sigh of relief and the sound of her sitting down was the response, as she made sure that using her fighting ability to rescue someone did no harm.Ā
The fear was as easily, tracelessly gone as it had come. Chef looked up at the ceiling of the cave, faraway mushrooms glowing like tiny stars, and felt the safest sheās ever been in her life.Ā
Fondue couldnāt remove the vines right away, so they waited. Minutes were long and serene and didnāt need words to fill the silence. When Chefās green shackles started crawling away, reluctantly releasing her, Fondue pulled her out of the pit.Ā
The restocking stroll having taken an intense turn, they decided to take a break and calm their nerves.
They found a relatively dry place under a huge cheese shroom and seated themselves for a lunch.
āUhā¦ I donāt really have any more food on me, only thatā¦ā Fondue sighed as she unwrapped the last of her snacks. āItās the latest result of my research. Thereās a room in the cave where cheese shrooms turn moldy, but itās more likeā¦ fermentedā¦ Coq au Vin said it was ānastyā when she saw it, so I didnāt show youā¦ but itās tastyā¦ you can try if you wantā¦ā
Chef took a piece of moldy shroom, gave it a little sniff and then put it in her mouth.Ā
Ā It was almost perfect on its ownācreamy texture with fine, delicate notes of noble mold. The only way to improve it was to dip it into fragrant fruit jamā¦ and what would make it perfect would be taking a bite of flaming sauce chicken before tasting the soothing sweetness of cheese! Chefās eyes opened slightly, beaming with professionalās inspiration. She needed to cook, and she needed it now. But she braced herself so as not to ruin the peace of their improvised picnic.
She shared the joy of her discovery with Fondue.Ā The witch smiled softly and looked away, her gaze wandering over the fog.Ā
They sat like that for a while. Neither really wanted to keep walking. The gentle glowing of a fluorescent shroom above the girlsā heads was like midsummer moonlight, lulling to sleep.Ā
āā¦are you having fun today?āĀ
Chef nodded enthusiastically. She does. Why ask? And still Fondue looked unsure.
āā¦maybe I shouldnāt have asked you to come alongā¦ for anyone, here doesnāt exactly feelā¦ niceā¦ there are livelier, lovelier placesā¦ but I like this cave and its gloom... you might think itās because Iām creepy, or cowardly, orā¦ā
Chef covered Fondueās palm with her own, and the witch thought for a moment that she heard the words in this touch, āItās because you are you. And with you, itās fun.āĀ
A dull growl behind the girls startled them, the joined hands breaking as they struck defensive poses. The mushroom they were sitting under slowly arose, awakened with sudden wanderlust, to its two stubby legs that would look funny if it wasnāt so giant and didnāt threaten to trample over the girls with its next step.Ā
āā¦play deadā, Fondue mustered, having turned pale, and softly pushed Chef away from the mushroomās path. The girls fell down organically, like two little rag dolls, and rolled slightly further away. Chef squinted as hard as she could and felt Fondue squeeze her shoulders. The mushroom stomped past them. Thump. Thump. Thump.Ā Ā The ground eventually stopped shaking, but the girls waited for some time before having the nerve to sit up.Ā
They threaded home carefully so as not to wake anything else, and held hands for added bravery. Was it adrenaline or something else, both of them felt very happy in the end of this adventure.
Namely Good Coffee Great Coffee, Harvest Town and Postknight 2 OCs
Meet Bonbon! They are very silly. They love listening to what other people have to say and occasionally theyāll talk about themselves, their family in another city, their photography hobby etc.
Sheās also really friendly and tactile and Will hug you if you donāt mind, and it will beā¦ intense :3
(I donāt have an Ovenist character because I havenāt played gpgp a lot (gcgc neither but for long enough to create an oc). Yes itās because itās too difficult for me lol!)
Meet Deco! Sheās very silly and chaotic and spends the least of her time actually farming. She prefers cave diving and fishing for treasures instead.
Her love interest is Sherry Allen cuz they both share love for shiny things you can buy stuff with + Deco was absolutely smitten the moment she met the gorgeous woman!
+ Deco has grown to hang out with Barl a lot, they adore him. Theyāve always wanted a cute little brother and in HT, the dream came true <3
Meet Zacky! A simple boy who never expected to become a hero, but became anyway.
Iāve got a lot on him in my latest postknight phaseā¦ The rant with some more art will be under the cut if youāre interested! (Also idk, there are minor spoilers (?) past Regalle (7-25), just saying)
His nameās Zachary, but everyone knows him as Zacky or, for the first few day in a new place, āAliyaās nephewā.
Aliya was a a famous postknight (think legendary postknight level), a reckless Pyrodash known for her crazy adventures, and well, she still is all that, itās only that no one knows for sure where she is at the moment. Last time they checked she stayed home because of an injury, and thenā¦ she disappeared for an adventure she doesnāt want anyone to interrupt.
Zacky was brought up by his relatives (Aliyaās wifeās family) in Violetfair, where he developed love for nature and respect for the elderly.
Heās always wanted to be a gardener, but the fateās decided differently. When Aliya asked him to help out in Maille on her sick day, he agreed, but she never returned, the day turned into a week and so onā¦ Everyone seemed to need Zacky, and his sense of duty (= fear of letting people down) kept him around until he became a postknight himself, thus beginning the game story.
No matter how much heās accomplished as a postknight, he still thinks of himself as a simple countryside lad, or a trainee at best, or an extension of his auntās career, hence the permanent blush of imposter syndrome and his complete inability to take praise.
+ semicanon that he never ranked up to rank S cuz he believed he wasnāt worthy (maybe iāll change that if i rank up myself lol, this exam is pure evil)
But apart from that, heās a good boy, basically everyone agrees on that (for an unknown reason, heās absolutely irresistible for women that are some kind of bosses, think Cassandra, Magnoliaā¦ Queen Vega? Durāgali? They find him adorable and sometimes pet on the head). He finds joy in selflessly helping people and giving gifts, so postknight is kind of a perfect job for him, which is one of the reasons he ultimately stayed.
He was reluctant to travel at first, but as he grew braver he started enjoying being out in the nature of other places, even though nothing beats Violetfair for him. And yep he and Chris are childhood friends!
His division is Neverwhisk because he vibes with them.
šØ The things on his shoes are windwings! Made with platinum and wind essence, they give him a speed & agility boost in fight (I should mention here that his (and mine) fighting style is ācoward with daggers and 100 lvl agility vs 50 lvl strengthā). They were made for Aliya by Gwynelle as they were besties back in the day! Aliya was often recognized by them, so imagine everyoneās reaction when she handed them to her nephew and disappeared.
And imagine Gwynelleās reaction when she finally meets āthe boy Aliya was talking about!ā >:3 She basically adopts him and helps him through the struggle of Quivtol.
During Sagacia plot, Zacky would spend all his free time in the village helping Gwynelle around the smithy and listening to the stories about her youth. In Regalle, he missed her care and was sooo happy to see her when she and Veremund arrived <3
As for Regalle, here happens the most intriguing partā¦ Zackyās love interest is Leif, Regalle innkeeper.
Ok hear me out. I did hope Leif would be romanceable, the way he appeared in the story kind of looked like that. And heās also sooo cute š So be it, plus Iām not super attached to the existing LIs, Zacky is probably just good friends with all of them.
Ok so!! The story goes!! Captain Reinhilde beat Zackyās ass, I mean yes he defeated her and listened to all the dialogue afterwards, but then he collapsed on the ground unconscious. And you wouldnāt believe it, he had to stay in the inn for a week with Leif looking after him <3
They are both young, inexperienced boys who have to choose between what they think is right and the ācommon goodā, and they bond over that among other things. I hope Leif becomes less depressed as he spends time with Zacky, I mean wth is his greeting even after completing the story? āIs this the life that we have to live?ā (along those lines) and a sad face? Bro I thought we helped figure everything out, why are you still having the existential crisis š Not on Zackyās watch, wth.
Remember that one delivery quest where Gwynelle sends Leif a pendant?
ā¬ļø This one? I absolutely love it because itās two my fav characters having the exact interaction I dreamt of, itās like this one quest was made for me specifically!
But apart from thatā¦
I hc that aegles exchange pendants as humans do with wedding rings and that as a parent/custodian you have a say in this ritual (cāmon, I can vividly imagine Veremund asking us if we would like to take his daughterās hand), so the meaning of this quest could be Gwynelle making it so Zacky proposes to Leif.
And she was right to do so, because otherwise their self-conscious asses would have never confessed.
Moving on to one more hc (that is a topic for another rant), imo Postknights shouldnāt have had a branch in Quivtol, instead Quivtol should have set up their own organization for militarized deliveries. Post-rangers? Something like that. I hc that this is what happened and that Leif became one of them and he and Zacky would occasionally meet on their duty and maybe patrol in Sagacia together and stuff <3
(Ignore the creatures I poorly drew from memory)
But donāt ignore Leifās hair not only looking like a bird nest, but actually being one.
OK I believe thatās all. Couldāve make it its own post but meh, I want all my madman rambles in one place, just wait until my next ht/gcgc face and watch this post triple in size with rants and doodles about Deco and Bonbon!
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Alright, Tumblr writers. Gather round. Iāve collected a bunch of writing tips Iāve relied on ever since I upgraded from ānine-year-old scribbling nonsenseā to āslightly more organised nonsense.ā Use them, steal them, ignore them ā your choice.
1. Your first draft can be nothing more than a sentence like:
āIdea: two characters meet in a park and have fun.ā
A first draft is allowed to be an outline, a scattered thought, or a skeleton. What matters is getting the idea out of your head and onto the page. You can shape it later.
2. You donāt have to write in order.
Sometimes we have dreams where we skip the boring parts and jump straight into the interesting scenes like the ending, the argument, or that one line of dialogue that makes you go, āDamn. I like that.ā Writing can be the same. Start with the part that excites you. The rest will come together later. It may sound really odd, but trust me, it'll help.
3. Good descriptions donāt automatically make a character feel real.
You know when you read about a character and think, āYeah, this is fineā¦ but somethingās missingā? That usually happens when the character has traits, but not life. Descriptions arenāt the problem ā itās that we donāt see how those descriptions actually matter to them. Hereās the difference:
Feels a bit flat: āLana had soft brown eyes, a quiet voice, and kept a journal with her all the time.ā Nothing wrong with it ā it just doesnāt make you feel anything. VS Feels more real: āLana kept a journal with her everywhere ā half out of habit, half because she hated forgetting things. She spoke quietly most of the time, but whenever she got excited? You heard it.ā Now thereās emotion. A reason. A spark.
4. If a scene feels off, check the emotion before you check the wording.
A lot of the time, a scene doesnāt work not because the writing is bad, but because the emotion behind it is wrong. Maybe the characters arenāt reacting strongly enough. Maybe theyāre reacting too strongly. Maybe the mood doesnāt match what just happened. When the emotion is off, the whole scene feels weird ā even if the description and dialogue are fine.
Example: āHe found out his best friend betrayed him. He sighed and walked away.ā Why it feels off: A sigh doesnāt match the weight of the betrayal. The emotion doesnāt line up with the moment. How to fix it: āHis mouth went dry. He didnāt even realise heād stepped back until his shoulder hit the wall.ā Same moment, but the emotion actually fits.
6. If youāre writing action, donāt make your main character āweak until suddenly theyāre a hero.ā
Itās such a common thing: the MC starts out timid, unsure, softā¦ and then one dramatic moment suddenly unlocks their hidden badass mode. It works sometimes, but honestly? It hits harder when the growth is gradual. When they slip. When they backtrack. When they get brave for one chapter and terrified the next. Slow character growth > Instant transformation every time. This took me ages to learn, but it's something everyone should hear at least once.
7. If you ever get hit with sudden inspiration, start writingā¦ and then immediately think, āWow, this is awful, I should restartāāDONāT.
That ācrappyā version is exactly where the good stuff hides. If you keep restarting, youāll kill the momentum and lose the spark that made you write in the first place. Keep going. Fix it later. Let the messy version exist so the better version has something to grow out of.
8. Iām sure this has happened to everyoneā¦ but have you ever struggled so much with dialogue that you just give up?
Yeah. Donāt. Most of the time, dialogue only feels impossible because youāre trying to make it perfect on the first try. Let it sound awkward. Let it sound clunky. Let it be two cardboard boxes talking. You can fix it later. Write the intention first ā the rhythm and personality will show up once the pressure is gone.
9. If you ever catch yourself thinking, āHmmā¦ should I kill them off?ā pause.
Before you swing the axe, take that character out of your story in your mind and imagine how much would actually change. If the answer is ābasically nothing,ā then the problem isnāt the character ā itās the role youāve given them. Give them a purpose before you give them a funeral. Yes, I'm not trying to convince you to keep them alive or make them come back from the dead, Iām just saying: make the death mean something. If their absence doesnāt create a ripple in the story, in the plot, or in another characterās lifeā¦ then itās not a death, itās a deletion. And your readers will feel the difference.
10. When writing a mystery story, please donāt let your MC suddenly go, āEverything clicked into place,ā without actually showing us how.
Like bestieā¦ weāre trying to solve this with you. We canāt read the characterās mind. We didnāt magically connect the dots while staring at the same clues and eating snacks. If your detective realises something, give us the moment they notice it. Let us see the weird detail, the off comment, the tiny clue that made them go, wait a secondā¦ Mysteries are so much more fun when your readers feel included ā not blindsided by an āaha!ā moment they never had a chance to reach.
11. Stop panicking about āoriginality.ā
Every writer has that moment where they go, āWaitā¦ has this been done before?ā And the answer is almost always yes ā but that doesnāt matter. What makes a story original isnāt the trope, the setting, or the plot twist. Itās you. Your voice. Your characters. Your humour. Your POV. Your emotional fingerprints all over the pages. Two writers can start with the same idea and end up with completely different stories. So donāt ditch a concept just because it isnāt groundbreaking. Write it your way ā thatās what makes it new.
12. A really simple one, but I still struggle: Give your side characters goals that donāt revolve around the MC. A world feels real when people have lives outside the protagonist. Give a side character a job interview. Give another one a crush. Let someone have a secret youāll reveal later. Let someone be busy when the MC needs them. Suddenly, your world feels alive instead of like a stage set.
13. āØ Bonus Tip: Use the āput it away and read it tomorrowā rule. I swear this changes EVERYTHING. When you finish a scene, donāt immediately rewrite it. Donāt panic-edit. Donāt go āugh this sucksā and delete half of it. Justā¦ close the document. Touch grass. Eat chocolate. Scroll for a bit. Sleep. Then tomorrow ā or even a few hours later ā reread it with a fresh brain.
You will suddenly notice:
lines that are actually great
lines that need a tiny tweak
parts that sound different from how you imagined
typos your brain was blind to
scenes that flow better than you remember
HOW FANTASTIC YOUR WRITING ACTUALLY IS
where you lost emotion
THE WONDER THAT COMES FROM YOUR MIND
where the sentence is too long
Itās such a small thing.
SO many people skip it.
But every published, polished author does it.
And the best part?
You will hear lines that are so good youāll surprise yourself.
Youāll hear the music in your writing.
Youāll hear the story breathe.
Okay, thatās it ā you made it to the end. If you use these tips, amazing. If you ignore half of them, also amazing. Writing isnāt a test, itās just you and your brain making cool stuff together. So go write something chaotic. Something dramatic. Something youāll look at tomorrow and go, āWaitā¦ thatās actually kinda good??ā
THIS IS SO GOOD. There are so many insights I didnāt know I needed. You say youāre just a learning, teen writer? You are so WISE, you are straight up ENLIGHTENED already, this is amazing! Yours is the kind of attitude that makes for great writing ā¤ļø Keep rocking and thank you so much for the making this post!
āļø A/N: What you are about to read is a paraphrased timeline story of the first arc in my Dr. Starline Redemption AU.
This AU is my personal look at āWhat might have happened if Starline had some good influences in his life before meeting Eggman?ā
For context: This AU still heavily follows canon, with more deviations happening the further into Starlineās journey we get. This specific arc takes place approximately 3-4 years before Starlineās introduction in the comics. It follows his misadventures with a group of ragtag inventors and chemists as they work together to win top spot in an innovatorās competition.
Enjoy. š
ā Act 1: The Starpoint Squad ā
šµ Opening Theme Song: Touch the Sky - Jeff Williams
Starline has been a fan of Eggmanās for as long as he can remember. In fact, heād say probably no one else compares when it comes to his knowledge of the man.
Heās made it his job to follow in his footsteps and follow his legacy, dreaming of one day joining Eggman himself so he can help him accomplish world domination at last.
Coming from a wealthy, prestigious family, and being a confident scientist and chemistā heās sought this path out for many years, but has had little success garnering the manās attention.
One day, as heās considering if thereās something he hasnāt tried yet, he happens to discover an innovator's competition is set to start soon, run by Atmos Industries.
Theyāre a well-respected name in the tech world, known for their many innovations and inventions; residing on the coastal town of Aethos, known for itās beaches and technological harmony with nature.
The top prize for said competition boasts the highly sought after position of becoming the companyās next big innovator. Considering the selective and closed off nature of the company due to political tensions around the islandās power source, this is a very rare and juicy opportunity.
Starline enters at once, deciding to secure first place and declare allegiance to Eggman during the winnerās speech. (As he KNOWS heāll be watching.)
At first, he believes itāll be a walk in the park. But upon clearing prelims, itās a surprise to all when the heads running it announce that the competitors are now required to form teams.
Although notably frustrated, Starlineās not willing to be bested by this, so he decides to find people who might be easy to manipulate into following his brilliant blueprint and gameplan.
He ends up settling on Rivet, (a inventor and x-gear rider he met in prelims when they both worked together to stop a runaway rocket thruster),
Hex, (a mech-loving, robot inventing rat whose insane coding skills caught his attention during prelims),
Lug, (a dumb, but incredibly strong bulldog who cooks a mean stew and is Hexās best friend and bodyguard),
Charge, (an oddball, plant loving bio-electrokinetic who understands a great deal about the physiological workings of living creatures, plants, and Mobians alike),
And Cello, (a very confident and stoic chemist firefly who makes her own concoctions.)
āØ Fun fact: (Starline wasnāt sure about her, but he quickly added her on lest he end up being stuck with the other option of Atlas (his idiotic and annoying rival from their academy days who he canāt stand).
Starline happily anoints himself as the leader due to his expertise in all the assorted fields, and at first the team is on board with it. But as he begins to ignore their attempts at insight and aims to control the whole show, the team begins to push back, quickly causing arguments to fly and tensions to mount, especially between him and Cello.
They quickly become the laughing stock of the competitors, gaining mockery from their soon-to-be-rivals as they canāt even decide on a team name. And after a few days of nonstop headaches, Starlineās at his wits end as to what to do.
He's frustrated and bewitched as to why theyāre fighting his perfect plan for victory, and when he learns Hex and Lug are thinking of dropping out entirely, he finally realizes that he has to do something or his whole plan will go up in smoke!
He finally asks Rivet for her insight, as sheās the only one still talking to him right now. Whatās going on? Why is everyone fighting him and his flawless gameplan? They DO realize it will lead them to victory, right?
And she explains where heās going so wrong. Itās not that they donāt trust his vision or skill, since clearly heās the most learned of all of them, but heās not giving them room to be involved in the process at all; treating the team like theyāre cogs in a machine to be used vs real people with ideas and aspirations of their own.
āI get that youāre used to working alone, but unfortunately, thatās not how being in a team works.ā Rivet tells him.
She asks if heās ever even asked any of them why theyāre here, and tells him that she personally wants to push her limits and see how much she can contribute to a good cause. That they ALL want to feel as though theyāve actually earned this victory, instead of just winning because they followed Starlineās orders.
He doesnāt believe her that the others share her thoughts, so she recommends he go ask Hex and the others directly. āWho knows? They might just surprise you.ā
So, Starline does, tracking down the rat first and finding him playing his favorite fighter game, Hero Mania. They talk, and he discovers thatā¦ Hex is here because he wants to prove to people that heās just as capable as everyone else. He reveals his dreams to make mechs have been crushed time and time again by adults because of his age. That they dismissed him because he was ātoo young to be serious.ā
So when Lug suggested he join the competition, he did, in the hopes that maybe he could find like minded people. People who might be willing to give him a chance to show what he could do, and help him where he was weak.
But considering the groupās been ignoring and excluding him from their conversations and arguments cuz āheās just a kidā, he wonders what the point of being here anymore is.
And Starline.. feels a scrap of sympathy for the kid, as he himself can understand the feeling, having had difficulty garnering support from his own parents growing up.
He also realizes that if he wants the team to stick together, then he needs to āfan the flamesā, so to speak, and get them all back on the same page.
So, he encourages Hex that he is most certainly capable. He states heās perhaps one of the most talented coders he knows of, especially for his age group. His dream isnāt impossibleā nay, itās in fact very much obtainable!
And Hexās eyes spark with tentative, reluctant hope. āYou.. really think so?ā
āBut of course!ā Starline smiles.
The encouragement comes from a selfish place, but he still finds his words being a bit genuine.
Cello turns out to have a similar vein of thought when Starline goes to her. She tells him that people have always told her what she should and shouldnāt do. Theyāre quick to judge her concoctions and ideas because they seem insane or impossible, but she knows her chemistry extensively. Her special vision also allows her to see possible combinations and stability ratings of different concoctions, which she checks her facts up against.
(Something Starline tests, and confirms. Huh.)
She tells Starline she joined this competition because her father had been telling her she needed to join the family business of mining, when she knew her calling in life was to be a chemist. āIf I can prove myself by making a brand new type of eco fuel and winning first place with my team, then heāll have no choice but to accept my path in life.ā
Yet again, Starline finds himself respecting and relating to that. Especially considering his family was very opposed to him running off pursuing a career modeled after Dr. Eggman.
He begins to see that Rivet was right, and that everyone here isnāt in it for an easy win. They all have a goal or dream they want to fulfill; be it helping a friend, testing their limits, making a difference, or proving themselves capable to themselves and others.
With all this knowledge in mind, he begrudgingly decides to pull back his heavy hand a bit and give them a chance to prove themselves. To suggest new ideas and voice their thoughts and opinions.
And to his surpriseā¦ it works! At the meeting where he announces the change, Lug of all people ends up surprising him by managing to find a good team name they all actively agree on, since it suits them and their shared goals.
Thus, they formally become known as:
The Starpoint Squad.
(ROLL DRAMATIC STAR WARS LIKE CREDITS)
(ā¦ no but likeā just roll the montage music.)
šµ Montage Music: Brand New Day - Jeff WilliamsĀ
We then see a montage of everyone working in tandem, while clashing with the rivals that scorned their lack of teamwork.
(Said rival team is constructed of Skara the Skunk, Stormy the Mink, Yew the Human, Atlas the Timberwolf (Starlineās rival), and Katrina the Cougar)Ā
The competition is focused on building tools to help aid future fighters or the recovery of nature and civilization from Eggman or extraterrestrial attacks.
As such, Starline and the Starpoint Squad agree to a modified version of his original idea; a robot that lends environmental and structural aid and support.Ā
This once sleek and Eggman reminiscent robot design becomes the more colorful and hodge podged looking B.U.D.D.I (Botanical Utility Device and Damage Improver). A helper robot designed and equipped to help hose down fires, fertilize fields, lift collapsed tunnels, saw fallen logs, and weld metal back into place.Ā
(A lot of these features were added by Starline under the guise of good to make him a weapon suitable of showing off his elegant yet destructive design during the winnerās ceremony, but the team doesnāt need to know that, right?)
He canāt let his vision of B.U.D.D.I disappear entirely, so when they come in need of the extra robot parts, he excitedly suggests they use fallen Eggman tech, to which they express concern.Ā
But in typical slick Starline fashion, he argues, āNot only does Eggman know how to build quality machinery, but this would also be a great way to.. how you say.. reuse and recycle, would it not?ā
They can see his logic in that, so he happily drags them to a robot graveyard of one of Eggmanās former fights where they gather up parts. (And heĀ tries hard not to fanboy along the way)Ā
As the weeks progress, the team begins to find a real flow, and Starline slowly finds himself coming to enjoy being around them.Ā
We see Rivet being a big reason for this, breaking through Starlineās initial unwillingness to interact with the team more than necessary for the project by dragging him out of the lab to join them for team lunches and other outings. While heās aghast and irate at first by her taking him away from his work, after a time, he begrudgingly submits to and even comes to enjoy her friendly antics.
When he starts willingly joining them for their team lunches, theyāre shocked, to which he argues, āOh donāt act so surprised! We all know she was going to drag me here anyways, so why waste time with theatrics anymore?ā
āAww, just admit you love us, Doc,ā Rivet teases, and all laugh as he argues vehemently.Ā
Starline and Rivet end up growing quite close despite their differences, finding they enjoy conversing with each other while working together in the lab. She doesnāt mind hearing him go on his long rambles, appreciative of how passionate and dedicated he is to his work, and he finds her quite fascinating, especially considering she grew up in the wilderness and managed to teach herself mechanics without any formal training.Ā (āItās a miracle you didnāt blow yourself up.ā) (āOh, I did. Many times.ā)
(They even bond a bit over a shared appreciation of Egg Tech, since a fallen Eggman Badnik is the reason she even got interested in technology at all.)
The two have a sweet moment one night where she ends up covering him up after he falls asleep in the lab from working too hard.Ā
And another, when she convinces him one day to take a ride with her on her hoverboard instead of shortcutting via warp portal into town. It ends up being a special moment as she takes a detour to show him her favorite view of the valley, and the two watch the sunset before continuing their work. They get back well past dark, chatting and bantering with each other.Ā
āļø We also see a bunch of other silly and important moments with the rest of the team.Ā
Such as when the team gets to experience Cello and Starline explaining something to them in incredibly large, scientific words while they try to comprehend what theyāre saying like dumbfounded sock puppets.Ā
Starline loses his cool and gives the boys a strict lecture on eating and drinking safety when he finds them doing so without care in the lab.Ā
Starline compliments the cafeteriaās sandwiches and soupā only to spit out said soup in shock when he discovers Lug is the one who made them.Ā
In an attempt to impress Starline, Hex and Lug end up going on a raid mission into Celloās area, (HIGHLY off limits when sheās working,) to steal a piece he needs for his power of the project. They end up having to run away from her wrath.
And there are many, many more.
āļø Starline also becomes Hex's mentor, taking the little rat under his wing and helping critique him on his robot builds and designs. He does so to help mold him and help build up his confidence, much like Eggmanās legacy did for him once upon a time.Ā
Hex begins to open up to him, until heās like a completely different person; eagerly asking questions, listening to and following Starline around like a little shadow, and taking all the notes he can.
Starline loves the attention, and Hex is just happy to have such a smart mentor helping him.
Starline unwittingly gains quite a soft spot for the kid, to the point where when the rat falls asleep in the lab while helping him, he gently carries him back to his and Lugās room. There, he has a heart to heart with Lug, who admits heās a bit jealous of their friendship, but knows Starline is good for his bud.Ā
āļø This conversation is the first moment that plants a seed of discomfort in Starlineās mind about how he plans to betray them at the competitionās end.Ā But in this moment, he brushes it off.Ā Ā
The next stab of discomfort comes later on when he ends up getting into a discussion with Charge in the lab.
The cat observes that heās been getting really chummy with everyone, to which Starline admits that theyāve all quite exceeded his expectations. Heās actually quite pleased with how things are turning out, despite it not being exactly what he had envisioned.Ā
He even states that despite his and Celloās intense fights, she completed the task she set out to do, and he respects that.Ā
Not knowing that Cello happens to be right outside listening. She smiles a bit and flutters off.Ā
Charge eyes him thoughtfully for a moment, before suddenly flipping the conversation on itās head.
āThen why is your aura still so dissonant?ā
āā¦What?ā
The catās mask of nonchalant laziness slips, and he reveals to Starline that heās known somethingās been off with him since day one. Unknown to most of the team, Charge has an ability to sense and discern a lot about people and who they really are by observing their bio-electrical auras.Ā
While he normally suppresses his ability due to the information otherwise bomboarding him from all sides, heās been in Starlineās vicinity a lot, and as such, has known that somethingās off with him.Ā
When Starline tries to play it off, Charge tells him that the only reason he hasnāt taken action yet to expose him, is because this team is important to Rivet, and sheās convinced Starline has his reasons for keeping quiet about whatever he is.Ā
Charge warns him to figure out what really matters to him and where his priorities lie, and that whatever heās planning, to leave Rivet out of it. Before reverting back to his chill, tired self, stating heās gonna go take a nap.Ā
Itās quite a scary and tense moment for Starline, and it leads him to really question, fear for, and reflect on his plan. Charge is right, that despite his befriending of the Starpoint Squad, his goal for the end of the competition has not changed. He still wants to capture Eggmanās attention! To show what he is truly capable of and declare all loyalty to him!
ā¦Butā¦ he also canāt deny that there is that small part of him thatās been starting to hesitate.Ā
He, for the most part, has been able to keep his admiration of Eggman a secret from the group. They know he has an inspiration heās eagerly pursuing after; that some great robotics master made him into the man that he is today, but heās managed to never truly share the truth of WHO it is. After all, if they knew, heād more than likely get kicked from the competition!
So everyone is left in the dark.Ā
But Chargeās revelation and a strange sense of guilt begins to gnaw at him. His attachment to the squad begins to show itās colors as he remembers Lugās ask for him to watch out for Hex. Thinks about his friendship with Rivet and partnership with Cello.Ā
These nagging feelings become even more blatantly obvious to him when Lug suggests they all go out for ice cream to celebrate them completing B.U.D.D.I. Win or lose, they did their best and made something awesome!
They convince Starline to tag alongāseeing as Aethos is home to some of the best ice cream on the planetāand they all cheer their team name before Lug gets the owner to snap a picture of them all together.Ā
ā¦Itās looking at this photo that Starline finds himself truly questioning things.Ā
Theyāll be the ones to take the fall when he enacts his plan. Theyāll be the ones to take the hit for his actions, even though they werenāt a willing part of it.Ā
Can he truly be okay with that outcome? With sabotaging and ruining the dreams of the people who look up to and respect him, just to obtain his own, selfish desires?Ā
For the first time in a long time, he has doubt. What is he going to do?
Thatās some gorgeous content! I donāt have words to express my love for the format you chose ā colorfully formatted text, art pieces, IDWās frames, music, they all work so well together, evoking the entire palette of emotions like a movie would! Itās even better in the form of a tumblr post (compared to the google doc), it is totally worth the work :3 And thereās so many art pieces actually?? Iāve been taking them for granted, but now the realization hit that they have been accumulated over the past year or so ā man, thatās a lot! Props to you! šOne glance at the post is enough to realize just how much time & effort has been invested in this, and thatās one heartwarming sight!
As for the story itself, it goes without saying itās great. To everyone who hasnāt read this yet for some reason: itās a big loss for you. Make sure to appreciate the awesome AU, Iāll check š«µš«µš«µ
Forgot to screenshot the original, but this drabble is based off a text prompt I saw floating around the dash.
[They see themselves in the mirror and notice changes.]
ā
Rivet stepped into the house, tired and ragged after another long day.
She dropped her belongings onto the couch and headed for the kitchen to hopefully get something to eat before she crashed.
As she passed by the mirror hanging on her wall though, she suddenly stopped as her reflection caught her eye.
Oh..
She pulled back and properly looked at herself for the first time in a long while.
Was that what she looked like now?
ā¦
What a mess.
Her fur was tangled, unkempt and dull, thanks to the lack of time she had recently to spend combing it all.
Bags hung under her eyes, exacerbated by her recent long nights and lack of sleep.
And to her surprise, she was shaking ever so slightly. Although whether from the overstrain of her ability, or the rush of adrenaline still coursing through her, she couldnāt tell.
She quickly attempted to make herself somewhat more presentable and put on a bright smile, but quickly lost it again when she saw just how fake it looked.
ā¦
She hoped no one had noticed.
ā¦Who was she kidding? EVERYONE had probably noticed. She looked like death.
At that her eyes widened, and like a sudden rush of water, emotion swept over her. For a moment, reality slipped through her mask, and the lavender cat pressed her fingers into the depths of her bangs as the tears came hard and fast.
STH Rarepair Week 24 - Day 1 - First Encounter - Amy x Bark
HAHAHA I DID IT
I WROTE IT
FOR THE SWEETIES
Thanks to @sonicrarepairweek2024 for the event that got me writing in English for the first time in my life!! (And to The Art of Letting Go EP by ANA that bangs as hell and kept me alive through the writing process)(I found out this music randomly and it turned out to be great)
The IDW comic shows the first encounter of Amy and Bark (I guess? I read it like a year ago,,, but now I think it did), but I got the vibe and reimagined it. This entire event will be severely vibe-based because Iām still unaware of the most of the Sonic lore :D
Fic under the cut! TW: amateur writing and possible grammar mistakes (Iāll fix it tomorrow after a good sleep)
The sun pours its light down on hills. Itād be hot today if there wasnāt a chilly breeze.
Another gust drags an umbrella from Amy Roseās hands and makes it float away. She, whoās been trying to set it up, lets out a cry and follows it, but fails to catch it. With her eyes fixed on the umbrella she doesnāt watch her way and almost tripsŠ²Šābut bumps into someone soft.Ā
Amy looks up and sees a bear. He holds the umbrella awkwardly with both hands, like he doesnāt know what to do with it.Ā
Few moments past, he hands it over to Amy, murmuring, āHere it is, maāam.āĀ
āThank you!ā she chirps. āYou are so strongŠ²Šāwould you please help me to get everything ready for a picnic?āĀ
Amyās been waiting for Sonic and Tails. Three of them always have picnics on Sundays, but today they seem to be late.
āWe havenāt met, but if you joined us, itād be a great chance to get to know each other! Iām Amy Rose, and whatās your name?ā Amy inquires when watching the bear set up the umbrella effortlessly.Ā
āBark. Bark the Polar Bear,ā he mumbles in reply.Ā
He has to go, actually, but he doesnāt know how to put it to not offend the young lady. Heās on a missionŠ²ŠāFang and Bean, need him to complete his part of their plan. How has he ever managed to appear in the girlās way?.. He sighs into his scarf and kneels to help her.
But it feels nice to unroll the colorful blankets and fill them with all kinds of snacks while listening to Amyās sweet rumbling. It feels much better than doing what they call mischief-makingŠ²Šāas soon as Bark listened to the Hooliganās plan for today, he didnāt like it, considering it nasty. The girl would be upset to know that he was a partĀ of something like that.
āWonāt you stick around? Are you sure?ā Amy asks when they are done.Ā
Bark shakes his head and gets up. He is both flustered and strangely happy, and both of the feelings make him want to walk away.Ā
āOkayŠ²ŠĀ¦ Thank you for the help anyway! Iāll be looking forward to seeing you again!āĀ
Amy waves goodbye to Bark until heās not in sight, and soon after that she turns around to Sonicās loud greeting.Ā
āSorry for the lag, AmŠ²Šāweāve got in a fight with guys who call themselves the Hooligans. Luckily, something went wrong on their side, so weāre here alive and well.ā
āIām just happy to have you here! Itās a pity though that you didnāt see the guy that has just gone awayŠ²ŠĀ¦ He was so nice and helped me!ā
āØ
Thank for reading this far! Iām a better writer, I promise, this piece is mid because I was focused on simply putting words together rather than making it good. But I hope itās any good! Not too bad for the first time I think!
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Feel free to modify those as you wish, no crediting needed, but I still will be glad if you tag me on your piece! Any feedback will be appreciated </3
Staying up late to not make the other one finish their work on their own. Being determined, yet slowly fall asleep by their sideā¦
Staying up late together to the point both of you canāt help laughing at the silliest things.
The other one is getting some good sleep for the first time in weeks. What worried them has become the past, and youāre going to take care of them while they regain their resources.
Two of us canāt get to sleep this night, so weāre killing time texting each other.
Staying up late to watch stars/an astronomical event and eventually turning it into a date.
Telling the other one that you had a dream featuring them, but itās early morning and youāve just woken them up.
Not getting to sleep before the other one is by your side, especially in a new place
