Mary Montgomery

without it having to need me

parking lots water marks and my drunk face in the bathroom mirror makes makes me feel like a ghostly shape makes me feel like I’m twice my age mostly aged partly faded one fifth dead if I live to a hundred and if I live to a hundred then I will outlive all of my friends but I don’t want that at all what’s so bad about growing up if I’ll stay young for as long as I want to you hate my voice it makes me feel like a little boy and you hate all the words I choose you push me like a pressure point public parks subway cars where I grew up I’d sleep over but we’d stay up now you just want me to shut up now you just want me to shut up but I’m not sad at all what’s so bad about growing up if I’ll stay young for as long as I want to

College Park, MD September 2015

in your mouth

Sherilyn Fenn

i wonder if you ever want me to show you my favourite hiding place

you should do what you want with him but i don’t want to see you with him i can’t stop you now and i won’t try i’ve been searching for a way to stay in dreams