value in metaphors

i’ve spent a good 1/3rd of my life alone in my bedroom

this isn’t counting sleep is that obvious

i think about your eyes a lot

someday you’r gonna be 75 and you’re gonna remember a video from vine that makes you laugh like nothing has made you laugh in 36 years. you’re gonna want to share it with your space friends but the internet is impermanent; vine was deleted and fully gone 17 years before the earth became uninhabitable so you’re just gonna be stuck there laughing like a maniacal fool trying to explain the concept as your space family threatens to shoot you out the airlock because your attempts at describing it sound like some kind of space lunacy rendering you a waste of what little food is left

when ur just goin about ur day but then landslide by fleetwood mac comes on and u just gotta. sit down and reflect for 3 minutes and 20 seconds

a single distant, but very loud, yeehaw

i want to lie on your chest and listen to you talk

not to be like that but having a crush on someone is one of the most innocent and sweetest things in the world like getting excited when they like a picture you posted or when they talk to you or message you bitch that feeling will never die out

Before tumblr dies… anyone wanna admit they have a crush on me

Having a “crush” is a level 3 horny offence and against Tumblr ToS, delete your fucking blog

Live horny die horny motherfuckers

have y’all ever had communion bread that was just so….nasty? like i know we have to suffer as christians, but do we really need to have whole wheat bread as the body of christ?

my old church used hawaiian bread. my standards are high

Some old housemates of mine were Syrian Orthodox. At their church different members of the church took turns baking the bread that would be consecrated for the Eucharist. This was all well and good until one woman baked raisin bread. This led to the memorable occasion of a rather flustered priest, who had not seen the bread until that moment, declaring, “This - except for the raisins - is the Body of Christ.”

EXCEPT FOR THE RAISINS omg

Raisins are just dried grapes though, and wine is his blood so really its like a two in one shampoo & conditioner except with jesus

like a two in one shampoo & conditioner except with jesus

you: sweater weather me, an intellectual: seasonal depression

@tyrantisterror