The Real Slim Shady

No. I’m a bodyguard. I do kill a lot of people but I’m just a human. I’m also repping the LGBTQ in WW2 so I think I get like extra outside the box points. What have you been doing lately? Film any new Hilton commercials? 

Lame. I was gunning for the type cast. But I guess I can’t win them all. Oh, well that is pretty interesting. I know I’m pretty psyched to see that movie. Gal is just...heart eyes. Don’t knock the Hilton commercials! Dick. But, for your info, I had two shows come out recently and have two movies coming up to film. So ha!

You’re mean. I’m currently busy now anyway. I’m in the new Penny Dreadful and I’m not playing a Vampire so sucks to be you. Poor guy. Gets cast as Batman and all anyone wants to talk about is Twilight.

Eh, I’ve been called worse. I’ve never seen it, are you playing a demon hunter on it? Isn’t that what you did on your last show? Because then I can still get my type cast curse on you if you are. Actually it’s pretty great to be me, for the record. I know, that is a really shitty break.

I really hope this doesn’t mean I have to play a Vampire again. I’d much rather sit here and watch you suffer. Though I think Rob might be in more pain.

Hey! Rude! Now I hope you do! I hope from now on you get type cast as a vampire, that’s what I hope. Oh, I’m sure Rob is a mess. I didn’t even play a main role, but it’s all anyone seems to want to talk about, especially now.