I was walking around my neighborhood and saw a bunch of police surrounding a small house for a drug bust. As I got closer, I heard the policemen barking aggressively, so naturally I was like, wtf??? And one of them caught my eye and said, “Oh, we’re trying to scare them out of there,” and minutes later a bunch of furries came out the house whimpering and shit.

please sign your posts with your url i refuse to be continuously terrified of humanity by them

one time my friends and i got bubble tea and my one friend didn’t know abt the tapioca pearls and he took a sip and then opened his mouth and let like 9 of them roll out of his mouth and onto the floor and then whispered “what the fuck”

therapist: how are you? me: fine how are you

i wonder what MY smell is????? when people wear my clothes or sleep in my bed…..what does it smell like?! WHAT IS MY SCENT

Ah…….annuzzer day in bikini bottem………

one time my friends and i got bubble tea and my one friend didn’t know abt the tapioca pearls and he took a sip and then opened his mouth and let like 9 of them roll out of his mouth and onto the floor and then whispered “what the fuck”

Oh thank the gods

You could always nip it in the butt too if that makes you happy.

BLESS HER FOR BEING VOCAL ABOUT THIS DO PEOPLE REALIZE HOW REAL THIS IS YET!?

Ok so i work for Airbnb. And they actually don’t fucking play with discrimination. At all. We were banning people who were going to Charlottesville for the riot. But they can’t do anything unless we are told. And the most common thing i hear is “i don’t want to start a ruckus or cause any trouble” but.. in order to prevent this stuff… we need people to. Don’t stay silent.

Holy guacamole and cheddy cheese!

“I mean, that’s not really that impres–JESUS FUCKING CHRIST.”

JESUS FUCK

Chosen.