@alwaysxinxtrouble | lil starter for leo âĽ
To say that the last three months had been an overwhelming whirlwind would be an understatement in Lizaâs book. Her brother had died -- car accident, drunk driver -- and now sheâd suddenly found herself with custody of Mattâs kid -- baby. Her niece who was now parent-less.Â
Sheâd barely had time to swallow her own grief before she was handed a seven month old -- like they were throwing her in the deep end of a diving pool with no life preserver. The first few days had been okay, but then Abby wound up with an ear infection.
Then another. And another. One for each month thatâd passed, it seemed, and Liza had started feeling like a failure. Like she couldnât get this parenting thing right no matter how hard she tried. And she sure as hell was trying, but with no support from her friends (who really werenât great friends to begin with, it seemed, considering theyâd all ghosted her the second sheâd found herself a de facto mother), and no family left? She and the sniffly ten-month-old snuggled against her shoulder were probably the two loneliest people in this hospital. Barely into my thirties and already Iâm ready for a mid-life crisis, she thought.
A tired sigh escaped as she paced in small circles, the room sheâd been plopped into with Abby not allowing for much more as she continued to rub soothing circles against her back. âI know, sweetheart.â Liza murmured, swallowing past the lump in her throat that felt like itâd been permanently lodged there since the cops had called her about Matt. âEverything sucks, but it gets better⌠thatâs what they say, anyway--â
There was a tap on the door before it opened -- of course heâs obnoxiously good looking she thought before realizing how much of a fucking mess she probably seemed. Dark circles under her eyes, hair thrown into a messy bun because she hadnât washed it in three days -- probably for the same amount of time sheâd been wearing the same hoodie, but Abby wasnât judging her looks⌠just her ability to parent.
âHi,â Liza said, but didnât want to take her hand away from Abbyâs back, afraid sheâd just start wailing again. She just hoped her gaze wasnât giving away how hard she wanted to wave the white flag and just give up. âSheâs had three ear infections in the last three months, and I know youâre not supposed to trust Google, but it just⌠seems chronic. And I feel like her pediatrician is just judging me at this point, but insurance doesnât cover anyone else in a sixty mile radius so Iâm⌠here instead.â Her cheeks warmed when she caught herself rambling. âSorry.â Liza said out of habit, though she knew she didnât have anything to be sorry for.