be present

take a breath, spit out the blood in your mouth, and get back up on your feet. you still got a couple of motherfuckers to prove wrong.

How white women use strategic tears to silence women of color

This is one of the best ones I’ve seen so far

40 year old neighbor passing by: what the fuck me, with my titties hanging out the balcony with a glass of wine and the fattest blunt ever seen before in human history: hello ronald. how are the kids

I’m glad to know that John Mulaney was an English major because it means when he says “college is just ‘I think Emily Dickinson is a lesbian!’ and they’re like ‘partial credit!’” he says it with authority. 

People who use the word “literally“ for something that can’t be literal is the reason I want man kind to be extinct.

nothings real dude not even grammer we made it up man go outside

lms if ur looking forward to a soft gay domestic life w the girl of your dreams