J U S T I C E

   He could do this. He could definitely do this. He wouldn’t use any powers, or whatever to solve whatever Batman would throw at him, either. Nope, he’d do this like a true detective. Because that was what this was all about anyway, right? 

   So, no matter what Bats would…

   “…”    

   “…Okay, give me–– just gimme a second. Because I know this. I feel like I’ve heard this before somewhere, maybe. But I know this. It’s very simple, since it’s…  It’s, uh..   It’s obviously…  I mean, A city without buildings is clearly a… and oceans without fish is…”

    Wait. Cities and no buildings, mountains with no trees… An anthill? No, it’s got no sea…  valleys with no breeze and no fish in any water?

   A… game? Board game? That’s too far fetched…

   Freddy gasped and his eyes grew a bit bigger as he slammed his fist in his other hand. “A Map!  Is it a map!?”

“Very good,” he murmured, quietly impressed that the lad had made the connection at all, much less so soon. He had been prepared to spare him undue embarrassment - he would have turned and poured his attention back into his work, giving the boy enough time to pull out his phone (which wouldn’t work in any of Batman’s work spaces) or called on his powers to help him solve it. Ignoring the telltale thunderous clash of course.

“It’s a rather simple one in the end, isn’t it? Funny enough how often the easiest answer is overlooked for being too rudimentary. It’s much the same with fighting crime... do you follow me?”

Diana may have enjoyed laying back and receiving deep, thorough oral sex - Bruce had other ideas of it. None of them were bad, no. Honestly, he found the entire thing intimate enough on it’s own to just enjoy it as an act. But with Diana, there was a whole other side that made it all so much fun.

There was the power - the satisfaction in reducing a mighty, bulletproof Amazon woman to a relaxed, dripping mess, with her legs spread and one foot resting across his back. He may have been doing the work, carefully tracing patterns around her pulsing clit with the tip of his tongue, but he was calling the shots.

There was the taboo of it all, too. Wonder Woman was a beloved icon. People of all ages looked up to her as a role model. Many more as a sex symbol. The way her outfit sculpted against her inspired countless fantasies. She was meant to be too good for most anyone to approach. And yet, Bruce used his fingers to part her lips and delve his tongue deeper inside her, lapping at warm, delicate flesh.

“You taste divine,” he purred, mouth against her thigh, his voice rumbling against her skin as a wet finger pushed inside her easily. And there was the other bit - the raw sexuality. Because how often would anyone be lucky enough to hear her use such fun dirty talk?

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“I’m not sure I can really remember the last time I had cereal...”

“.. of anything?”

“Here’s where I turn around, smile and say ‘I prefer such-and-such on a woman, and nothing else!’ And of course, it’s whatever latest fragrance that Wayne Cosmetics have released recently. But I’ll level with you - I have no idea what that is right now. Can you keep that secret...?” Bruce Wayne gave a saucy wink towards the rolling camera following him, barely noting what network it was from. One of the more independent ones, out of his own control.

“...” He has several - gunpowder, because it’s such an easy thing to discern and place at a crime scene. The burnt ozone that comes from building a new iteration of the Batmobile. Oil from certain machines. 

“Uhhh, you’re literally looking right at me working the coffee, Batman. Whatever happened to ‘the world’s greatest detective’, huh?” Joker arched a brow. “Besides, I’m your very own personal arch nemesis! Batman’s arch nemesis doesn’t need an ‘occupation’.” He said the word as though it tasted bad, and picked up the cloth to wipe imaginary dust off of his little coffee stand set-up.

“Thanks for the reminder,” he grunted, whipping out his personal awesome and in-no-way-affiliated ‘puter phone. If he was going to take this ‘arch enemy’ thing seriously, it was only fair the Bat gave as good as he got.

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