Adam Serwer

Ok, this post will contain massive Star Wars: The Force Awakens spoilers. You’ve been warned. 

Turn back now. 

Ok here goes. 

There are many theories about the as yet unrevealed identity of Rey, the protagonist of The Force Awakens. The most popular one I think, holds that she is Luke’s daughter. After all, she has the ah, Skywalker way with the Force, and the parallels between her and Luke’s modest upbringings are hard to ignore. But I think this is a little too obvious for Abrams, who deliberately pulled a bait and switch implying that Finn was the Jedi hero of the film, when it was really Rey. 

There are other theories, that she’s Han and Leia’s daughter and Kylo’s sister or possibly twin (I find it hard to believe that two parents finding their daughter after two decades would not see fit to mention it to each other, and both of them clearly know who Rey really is) or that she’s Obi Wan’s granddaughter (not a bad theory, since we hear Obi Wan’s voice during the flashback, but it would require Obi Wan to have broken his vows and abandoned his post watching over Luke). 

So here is my theory: Rey is a clone of Anakin Skywalker. 

Think about it: The only reference to the prequels in the entire movie is Ren mentioning the possibility of replacing storm troopers with clones. Rey is great with machines, she’s a fantastic pilot, and she is effortless with the force. Not even Luke was that much of a natural--only ::shudder:: Anakin. This would explain the violence of Rey’s flashback--she was looking at what was essentially a past life. (Obi Wan, on the other hand, had no use for machines, wasn’t a great pilot, and was strong with the Force but not effortlessly). 

This theory also explains why she is hidden away. It would be extremely hard for a parent to part with a child (if she were Luke’s daughter) but if she were a clone of Anakin, Luke would be more frightened of the possibility of training her, especially given what happened to Kylo Ren. 

So who cloned Vader? My theory is that Palpatine cloned Vader in case he needed a spare, and that the clone process began as soon as Vader died. Luke and the rebellion find her, and horrified, Luke hides her away, unwittingly replicating his father’s upbringing as a slave on a desert planet (which he had no way of knowing about, not knowing his father well and having all information about him suppressed by those who knew both Luke and Anakin). 

The other thing about this theory is that it is perfect torture for Kylo Ren: His biggest fear is that he will never be as powerful as darth vader. And Rey IS Darth Vader. Couldn’t be more perfect. 

With the 60th Anniversary of Brown v. Board coming up, I was looking through some of my old notes and I found this memorable passage from James Patterson's Brown v. Board of Education: A Civil Rights Milestone and Its Troubled Legacy. It takes place at the White House, prior to Brown being decided.

 "At that time Eisenhower invited [Earl Warren] to a dinner at the White House and sat him next to John W. Davis, who was leading the defense team against Marshall. After telling Warren that Davis was a great American, Eisenhower took the Chief Justice by the arm and explained to him the southern point of view. Southern whites, he said, “are not bad people. All they are concerned about is to see that their sweet little girls are not required to sit in school alongside some big overgrown Negro."

"When a man has emerged from slavery, and by the aid of beneficent legislation has shaken off the inseparable concomitants of that state, there must be some stage in the progress of his elevation when he takes the rank of a mere citizen, and ceases to be the special favorite of the laws, and when his rights as a citizen, or a man, are to be protected in the ordinary modes by which other men's rights are protected."

-- Justice Joseph P. Bradley, 1883.

Bradley was striking down the Civil Rights Act of 1875, which barred racial discrimination in public spaces. Seven of Bradley's fellow justices agreed that, in 1883, it was black Americans who were "the special favorite of the laws." 

“Former presidents compare their libraries the way other men may compare their, well… Just wondering how LBJ would’ve handled that.”

-- George W. Bush speaking at the Lyndon Johnson Presidential Library in Austin, Texas, April 10 2014.

''Johnson found it difficult to sustain his rationality in dealing with war critics. During a private conversation with some reporters who pressed him to explain why we were in Vietnam, Johnson lost his patience. According to Arthur Goldberg, L.B.J. unzipped his fly, drew out his substantial organ and declared, 'This is why!' ''

"Much of the black militant talk these days is actually in terms far closer to the doctrines of free enterprise than to those of the welfarist thirties-terms of "pride," "ownership," "private enterprise," "capital," "self-assurance," "self-respect"... What most of the militants are asking is not separation, but to be included in-not as supplicants, but as owners, as entrepreneurs-to have a share of the wealth and a piece of the action. And this is precisely what the Federal central target of the new approach ought to be. It ought to be oriented toward more black ownership, for from this can flow the rest-black pride, black jobs, black opportunity and yes, black power..."

Well, this is just my opinion. But here are five of the pieces I'm most proud of:

John Roberts' Long War Against the Voting Rights Act I went back and looked at Roberts' tenure in the Reagan Justice Department to show that he's had it in for the Voting Rights Act since his 20s.

Bulldozing Homes and Civil Rights How a small town in New Jersey razed its only majority-minority neighborhood and almost killed the Fair Housing Act.

How Sonia Sotomayor undermined the NSA Last year Sonia Sotomayor wrote a concurrence that clears the legal path to striking down NSA data-gathering.

Are the NYPD's Stop and Frisks Violating the Constitution? A collaboration with MoJo's Jaeah Lee. People still link to this, in part I think because the data is so clear.