jennifer’s body not realistic bc if i had a demon friend who killed dumb ass men for sustenance i would let her like we can work that out

g*d gave me two dirty little hands and i will use both of them 2 hold small animals, eat hot chip, and make rude gestures at authority figures

when megan fox said “my tit” (as her dying words) on Jennifer’s Body it changed the entire cinematic experience after 2009. no other movie had captured the millennial death experience better. in this essay I will-

I don’t feel strong enough but I always am

Straight people really don’t know what they’re talking about, ever. They’ll be like “oh this is a good song” and they’re never right

Straight people are directly responsible for the popularity of that “once I was 7 years old” song and they must atone for their sins

Ask her if she wants a milk steak

the mickey mouse clubhouse dances are SO funny

They just know how to party…

thats the Hotdog Dance you ignorant fools

What episode of drake and josh is this?

mentally i am living in a cabin in the middle of nowhere in the woods of oregon and it’s foggy and i am wearing a big sweater and baking banana bread