Queen Jerk of Bitch Mountian

I think next thursday is gonna be the best day of my entire life tbh

reblog for next thursday to be the best day of your life

not risking it

imagine trying out a super risky outfit ur not sure is gonna land well and on your way to the party you fall into a bog and become a bog body and in like 3,000 years they pull you out in like a pink mesh bathing suit with an applique that says “barbie girl” on the front tucked in as a body suit to a pair of track shorts that say “your card was declined” on the ass and a pair of elevated 90s gel sandals with a hitclips clipped to the strap with one cartridge (60 seconds of an nsync song) and they reconstruct you in a museum and tell the public that’s how people dressed

for the record: i wrote 10k of indepth introspective character analysis turned personal projection fanfiction about francis from malcolm in the middle, never posted it anywhere, then changed all the names and submitted it for an lgbt essay scholarship as a dissertation on internalized homophobia’s psychological impact into adulthood and won $1000 so. first of all, follow your dreams, second of all, francis from malcolm in the middle is fucking gay

ah yes now i can finally wear the sweet embrace of death as a fashion statement

friends deep lore: the reason chandler is so bad at generally existing in the 90s/early 2000s is he actually died in 1843 of lead poisoning and now he’s been reanimated by dark wizard ross (a homophobe) and the only way to break free of his curse of living undead is to find love and luckily he shares a flat with friendly modern man joey who teaches him the way of the world and maybe just, maybe, he also teaches him the meaning of love. 200k, slowburn, fisting