Unsatisfied

I’m sorry that nobody in your family can bake

my moms a private chef and im in culinary training dont roast us like this

i’m sorry that your mom went to culinary school and still can’t bake :(

i……..

had……

the slime of my life

and I’ve never felt this way before

and I swear

It’s the truth

Couldn’t risk it.

Hi brain, you obstinate fucker. I drank the clear splashy stuff. I ate the green things. I went under that bright fucker up there. I did the thing with the moving and sweating and whatnot. Now make the happy chemical, you lump of fuck.

did you do the thing with lying unconscious for 8 hours

I like it when tybalt tells mercutio to “have at thee boy” because it’s like a really old timey “try me bitch”

my ultimate life hack? i like, never wear makeup except for occasions where i want to feel overly hot/professional. this way, people who see me everyday won’t be shocked when i don’t wear makeup, they will instead be shocked at how much hotter i can become. how much potential i don’t unlock for no reason other than laziness

fucking dinosaurs got this

The shows was garbage anyway. No minority. Just white wash.

plot twist: JK rowling writes a series on voldemorts point of view

“i looked in the mirror and cried. i look like an egg”