John Mulaney quotes I identify with
on a deep, spiritual, personal level:
âI meant to learn about cars, and then I forgot.â
âI have a girlfriend now myself, which is weird because Iâm probably gay based on the way I act and behave.â
âI could never dress goth, and donât get me wrong. Iâm unhappy, itâs not that.â
âIt is 100% easier not to do things than to do them. And so much fun not to do them! Especially when you were supposed to do them.â
âWhoa! That tall child looks terrible! Get some rest, tall child! You canât keep burning the candle at both ends!â
âI was raised Catholic. I donât know if you can tell that from the everything about me.â
âI thought I was gonna be murdered my entire childhood!â
âWhat is college?â *incoherent babbling*
âI was sitting up in bed a few weeks ago like [groans]. You know, life?â
âWhen I walk down the street, I need everybody, all day long, to like me so much.â