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@ab--imopectore

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Who has seen the wind?

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Itβs okay my love, you tried your best.
You showed up so fully and openly that it continues to hurt and live with you with every present breath. Truly that in itself is a testament to the love you already had within you, that you already carried with you. Itβs okay if youβve never been okay since. Let your heart rest. Itβs okay. Itβs okay if you never heal from it. Itβs okay if it broke you. Itβs okay if you can neither move forward nor back. Itβs okay, itβs okay, itβs okay.
- To my younger self, from the bottom of my heart, I will always love you more
Deliberately making room for something yet to experience.
romain rabasa

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βI remember an incident from my own childhood, when a very close friend of mine and I, we were walking down the street. We were discussing whether God existed. And she said he did not. And I said he did. But then she said she had proof. She said, βI had been praying for two years for blue eyes, and he never gave me any.β So, I just remember turning around and looking at her. She was very, very Black. And she was very, very, very, very beautiful. How painful. Can you imagine that kind of pain? About that, about color? So, I wanted to say you know, this kind of racism hurts. This is not lynchings, and murders, and drownings. This is interior pain. So deep. For an 11 year-old girl to believe that if she only had some characteristic of the white world, she would be okay. [Black girls] surrendered completely to the master narrative. I mean the whole notion of what is ugliness, what is worthlessness. She got it from her family, she got it from school, she got it from the movies β she got it everywhere; itβs white male life. The master narrative is whatever ideological script that is being imposed by the people in authority on everybody else. The master fiction, history, it has a certain point of view. So, when these little girls see that the most prized gift that they can get at Christmastime is this little white doll, thatβs the master narrative speaking: βThis is beautiful. This is lovely, and youβre not it.β
Toni Morrison on what inspired her to write her first novel, The Bluest Eye.
βIβve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.β
β Maya Angelou
Egon Schiele, Seated Woman With Bent Knees, 1917

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from 'bird by bird: some instructions on writing and life,' anne lamott, pub. 1994.
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