did you hear about the girl who lives in delusion?
after her body had stopped shaking for hours, after her skin had stopped itching and her heart had stopped feeling as it was ready to get out of her chest, angie was ready for the numbness to shallow her completely. now that there were no drugs in her system, or the signs that they were ever there, there was nothing else for her to do but to face the emptiness that lived in her bones and her whole body. it was just her and the space her son had left inside her, as he had been nothing but a short and perfect dream.
she should had known that happiness was not in the cards for her. it had been too easy, too meant to be and she had lowered her guard. levi's arms had been the home she had craved so badly and it was easy to believe she belonged there, that they were going to make it work. her future was clear at the time, with a tiny little guy dressed in his dad's uniform and her days filled with nothing but playdates and cuddles. now, months after, almost imprisoned in the place that was supposed to heal her, angie had nothing else to do but to face the completely loneliness she felt. her baby was gone, his father was gone and it had all being her doing.
time and time again, she had denied levi's visits, just like she had refused to see him when she was sober after everything happened. when the drugs didn't cloud her senses, the only image of the person she loved so much was unbearable, specially since she knew how much he loved their son. she had destroyed their family, she must had done something wrong and his constants reassurances were just too much for her. and now she was just so damn ashamed of herself, what could he say to her? he probably hated her anyway, didn't he? angie knew she hated herself enough for both of them.
that's why, when he suddenly appeared in her room, angie wasn't sure if he was just another illusion or if he was truly there. it certainly could be something aaron could arrange with his money, but it didn't made sense. and his eyes were so damn earnest, like seeing her was the biggest gift he could ever receive.
and god, how much she loved him. she may be stupid and horrible at showing it, but she did. angie felt it everywhere when he touched her, just the simple movement of her hair, but it was enough for her to just... wake up.
it took her less than a second to wrap her arms around his neck, holding him so close and so strongly, knowing way too well how it felt when he slipped from her fingertips. she just wished she never had to let go again.ย ย
gummygunk
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