Stolen

Do i suffer from depression? no i can't. I know and known people who do. What gives me the right to say that i do.

It's a lingering sadness that wont go away. It's a constant feeling if being alone that wont go away. It's an anxiety that i don't know where it comes from.

I want nothing more than to have a friend, but i push away anyone that tries to get close. They'll eventually give up. I can count all my "friends" on my fingers, i know all their fears, their wants, their problems, and desires. Yet not one of them could tell you the last time i cried, felt scared, broke down or was genuinely happy.

What they would say is that im strong, independent, successful, thoughtful, great listener, or a great mom. Truth be told im neither. Well except maybe a great listener.

Is it possible that this is happening because i have none to confined in, that i only have the voice inside my head to listen to me?

You left me today. Im sorry i hurt you, i don't know what im doing. We both want the best for her and but we can't be friends. Im sorry for being selfish in wanting to try.

Why cant i be happy, why can't i just be me, why do i feel so numb.