Where's My Mind?

well this social situation isn’t going the way i acted it out in the shower

dont speak to me or my versace dress or my son ever again

never beg to be loved and respected.

i need someone who understands my fucked up brain.

fucking hate it when people ask what my hobbies are/what i do for fun idk dude i like standing in the river

Dating someone who pays so much attention to the special details about you is the affirming love everyone deserves.

if i have a daughter im going to name her lizard and then she’ll get the nickname liz and everyone will be like “oh is it short for elizabeth?” and she will have to say “no my name is lizard”

Hot wedding idea, the worst man, it’s his duty to try and prevent the wedding at all costs.

The best man and worst man engage in Spy Vs Spy shenanigans until the wedding is done

don’t stare at the moon too long or else you’ll remember that nothing in this stupid fucking world makes sense

*looks in a mirror* you again

“you have nice hands”.... okay???? suck my fingers then????

Day dreaming about love is giving me brain damage

shit maybe i’m only meant for myself