I really wanted to write some polyfrogs + farmer stuff bc I love my frogs! and I want them to be together and date and love each other! but I also love charmer and chowder and farmer are just the cutest together. sO
it starts out as kind of a weird arrangement?
chowder and farmer are already together
nursey and dex (finally) get together
chowder is really, really happy for them. he’s wanted this FOREVER
he’s honestly more invested in their relationship than they are. he loves love and he loves his friends
they all end up going on double dates together as a result! jerry’s, annie’s, etc.
nursey dex and chowder are always bringing big ass signs to farmer’s volleyball games and she lets them tag along when they go out for team win meals
farmer against the glass for their home games screaming her head off
they get along really well and they’re pretty much always together.
nursey has everyone’s class schedule memorized
he brings them coffee a lot
as a result of them always being together both in a physical sense and in like, a romantic context, chowder kind of naturally associates all of these people in his life with romance and dating
he starts feeling kind of… guilty? because he loves farmer! and she’s great and she makes him really, really happy, and they’re great together
but chowder also starts noticing how much he likes when dex gives one of those big, full smiles
and how when he falls asleep in the haus on the couch, nursey will pick him up instead of waking him up and take him to his room and instead of just laying him down, makes sure he’s under the covers
and he finds himself making excuses to be around them even more than he already is
farmer gets really confused because chowder won’t meet her eyes sometimes and he goes pink when looking at nursey and dex
this is getting long jesus
finally farmer has to sit him down
“chris babe what’s wrong? like… you’ve been hella off lately, you seem really upset and I wanna know if I did something wrong”
chowder is kind of choked up at this point
both because he’s upset and because he just really loves cait for caring about him
“no! no it’s not you I promise I just…”
“IthinkIhavefeelingsforNurseybutalsoforDexI’mnotreallysureI’vegottathink”
farmer kind of gapes. chowder runs off, leaving her (which he feels really bad about but he really needs time to sort this out)
as a result, farmer ends up going to nursey. they’ve become pretty good friends lately and being around him calms farmer down a lot, which is helpful because she’s got a really strenuous major (she wants to go into sports medicine in the future)
“Nursey? Can you, like, help me with something?”
“farmer if this is about math this isn’t funny I messed up that equation once, okay”
“it’s not that oh my god but also I can’t believe you don’t know your times tables”
“literally math is the worst subject shut the fuck up caitlin”
she explains to him chowder’s freakout as best as she can
“it almost sounded like he was trying to breakup with me without breaking up with me, y’know? and I think it’s because he thinks he’s got a crush on you, or dex, or maybe both of you?”
Nursey knows what this is instantly.
“Polyamorous. He wants to date more than one person.”
he explains it and gives her some links and stuff to explain it better than he can. then he says that he thinks they all need to have a meeting, together, as a group, then when he sends cait on her merry way, calls dex up
“how would you feel about dating other people?”
“derek, is this a breakup? because that’s really shitty of you to call when we live in the same–”
“no it’s not a fucking breakup, billiam, chill”
“i’m going to fucking throttle you. what are you even talking about”
“like… dating chowder. both of us, while he also dates farmer.”
“that sounds really fucking complicated”
“babe when are we like not complicated tho”
anyways!!! they have their meeting and everything goes really well because if anything bad happened to my frogs i would personally die
chowder admits that he didn’t really know what he was feeling and sort of overreacted/overworked himself into a panic about losing his friends and his girlfriend to his feelings
farmer says that she’s completely fine with chowder wanting intimacy with nursey and dex so long as he doesn’t forget about her and she’s still important to him
“Of course you are!!! I really love you!!! I love all of you actually I love you guys a lot and it’s really–”
[TEXT: JOHN JOHNSON]: they love you too chowder but focus for the narrative this has already gotten really long
dex is a little wary. he’s willing to try but he really values their friendship and doesn’t want that to be messed up, which is what took him so long to admit his feelings to nursey in the first place
he also mostly identifies as gay just bc of his strong preference for men but he’s (selectively) into some girls. farmer is cute and he probably wouldn’t mind cuddling up with her sometimes
nursey is really open with his own sexuality but he’s very into committed relationships
he doesn’t want it to be an open relationship. he likes exclusivity. he likes saying “this is my boyfriend, my girlfriend, my partner, my datemate” etc. that is his person.
if they’re doing this, he either wants it to be “this is dex, chowder, and farmer, and they’re my partners” or “this is dex, my boyfriend, chowder, my other boyfriend, and my boyfriend’s girlfriend, my friend farmer”
having labels and things helps with his anxiety and lets him feel settled in a group so that he knows his place and where he stands
chowder loves them all and thinks they’re all hot and wants a lot of making out to happen. he’s not sure yet but he also might want more with nursey and dex.
farmer: “i’m okay with that especially seeing as I legitimately can’t keep up with your sex drive”
nursey wants to know if it’s okay if he kisses farmer sometimes
the boy just likes kissing ok it makes him feel loved
chowder, dex, and farmer: *softly, but with a lot of feeling* “holy shit”
Dex: “Let’s just take it slow and see what happens, okay?”
hint: everything works out really well
chowder doesn’t feel so bad anymore because everyone knows everyone’s feelings
his little bisexual heart is happy all over the place, as is nursey’s pansexual self
nursey gets a lot of the affection he needs since dex is still working out his own feelings about PDA and affection in general
dex gets to hang with farmer a lot more! which is great because she is a reasonable human being with sense in her brain, whereas nursey and chowder are Big Ol’ Dorks 24/7 all the time
cuddle piles are really big in this relationship
dex gets more comfortable with cuddles
chowder has a bunch of the people he loves all in once space
farmer gets large warm hockey boys with good butts and nice laps to sit in
farmer and nursey make out a lot which is gr9
sometimes nursey is laying on the biohazard couch upside down doing class readings and when he wants to take a break he nuzzles up to caitlin for kisses
nursey is a very, very good kisser
farmer also has full butt-touching privileges
three times the butts to touch
they all go on dates! like individual ones too, not just giant group dates
nursey takes chowder to the aquarium sometimes
dex and chowder go out to a science conference (they’re so cool gosh)
farmer and nursey go to a wine tasting. they’ve got the same sense of weird humour and farmer’s got a great fake english accent + nursey speaks italian and french so they go and act like high-society europeans who are visiting a wine convention or some shit
they come back on the bus slightly tipsy with three free bottles of wine. no one knows how they do it
little things they do together are all fun too
dex likes to fix things to show affection for people so he fixes famer’s shitty car a lot
farmer pretends to swoon over “the hot hockey boy fixin’ up my car since my delicate self can’t manage”
dex: “shut up you literally squat 200 leave me alone”
farmer lives in the volleyball house
nursey and dex are interrogated about their intentions with “their sweet angel daughter caitlin farmer”
nursey: “angel? farms didn’t you steal like two hundred dollars worth of clothes from urban outfitters last week”
farmer: “urban outfitters is a racist capitalist empire that profits off the exploitation of native peoples”
nursey: “i’m literally a quarter navajo i can’t believe i’m dating two white devils”
they end up having pretty much free reign to come over whenever
the volleyball players start showing up much more often to kegsters and just to chill around the haus
their group dates are always wild
farmer steals all their fries when they’re out to eat and they all swap ice cream cones
famer climbed into a fountain once for a picture and they almost got arrested
they all got staggeringly drunk one night a la the hangover. when they woke up the next day, all of chowder’s underwear were missing including the ones he was supposed to be wearing, farmer looked like she’d used her entire body to swatch makeup and she had what looked like beard burn on her ribcage and right boob, nursey had a record player clutched in his arms and was missing part of his hair and dex was wearing nothing but the american flag as a toga. they were all in chowder’s room. a golf cart was parked outside and when dex got on twitter he was blocked by build-a-bear canada
anyways they love each other and they’re a great quad
janainaart
yousharknotpass
theartofmadeline
dededos
