You Said Go

Here is the video from our Both Hands work day this past Saturday! 

It was such a wonderful day full of hard work, dear friends, and sweet-, holy moments with Ms. Connie. As we gathered for a group picture at the end of the day Ms. Connie told the kids, “Kids, don’t ever let anyone tell you that God doesn't answer prayers every single day.” We are honored to be a part of her answered prayers!

We are getting close to our goal of $15,000 to be able to fully fund our adoption. We were told today to tentatively except a court date at the end of this month, which means we could be traveling in 1-2 weeks! Will you consider helping us go get Asanda? Our Both Hands account will remain open until our adoption is finalized, and all donations are tax-deductible. 

Almost 10 years ago exactly, I was stepping off a plane in South Africa for the first time. I knew that trip would change my life. I did. I think I would have given anything to have “known” how exactly God would use my experiences over that month to shape the course of my vocation, my calling, my understanding of mission, my family. I’m so thankful I wasn’t given that option! Just think how hard THAT waiting would have been.

One of the ways that my life was changed was through some key scriptures that came alive to me for the first time. One of which was James 1:27

Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.

James, like he does, lays it out pretty simple for us. I sensed God had given me a new compass, and have continually struggled to right myself to its North since. It was a major guide in our decision to be missionaries, and also to pursue adoption. And we know that God has not released us from this direction.

So, when we came across Both Hands, and were ultimately chosen to participate in one of their projects we were overjoyed! It seemed like one of those “God things” and we were so excited. The video above gives you a LITTLE snapshot into how inspiring and passionate these folks are. It is so worth the time to watch it!

From their Mission, Vision, and Purpose statement:

Both Hands mission is to fulfill James 1:27 by serving orphans, widows, and Christian adoptive families.

Both Hands' purpose is to help Christian adoptive families raise funds for their adoptions by coordinating a service project fixing up a widow’s home.

Both Hands' vision is to see the day when finances are not an obstacle for Christian families who are led to adopt, while simultaneously serving every widow in need of home repairs.

We have gathered a team** of dear friends will be serving a widow, Connie, on May 2nd. Connie is pretty desperate for some help around the house and we will be doing yard work, painting the exterior of her home, and a few minor carpentry jobs for her. She is such a sweetheart and we have already been blessed by visiting with her.  Our team** is seeking sponsors for the day, and 100% of the money donated will go to our adoption fund. 

Our fundraising goal is significant: $15,000. This would completely cover our final Country Fee payment that will be due in a few weeks, as well as travel expenses for 6 weeks. It is a big goal, but God is bigger! We have seen his faithfulness--literally, to the penny--up until this point during this process. Any and all donations help. In fact, that’s only $100 for 150 people, $75 for 200 people, or $35 for 429 people. You can find out more information about donating online, or sending in a check here. We hope to have as much raised by May 2nd as possible, but our account will stay open until Asanda’s adoption is finalized in South Africa. 

It has been a whirlwind of a month in the Reynolds house. We received our official referral on April 7th. This means that the South African government has official matched us with our daughter Asanda, and recommended that she be adopted into our family forever. Asanda. That’s her name! And the official referral means that you get to know that now. Unfortunately, we can’t share pictures online until we pass court in South Africa. She’s beautiful--trust us. :) 

So what now? Here are the very practical, process related steps that need to take place before we can go get our girl. 

1.  Accept our referral. We did this immediately!

2. File I-800 is USCIS. This is the second round of immigration paperwork. We also sent this off ASAP. It typically takes 4 weeks to get this back, so we should hear something the first week or two in May. 

3. Get I-800 back.

4. Send Asanda a photo book about our family. 

5. Get a court date. 

6. Get a travel date and book some flights, a car, and an apartment. We know that we need to be in court by July 4th. We will have bonding time for 1-2 weeks prior to court, so everyone is expecting our travel date to be around mid to late June. 

There is a whole other list--Clem’s passport, outfitting a big girl room, adoption training, fundraising, and normal life--but at the end of this this happens:

7. We get to experience a miracle! We get to understand the Gospel--that God has adopted us as sons and daughters--in a very new and real way. We get to be family with a little girl who hasn’t had a forever family in 9 years. 

It is Holy Week.

Several weeks back I read something that sucked all of the air out of my lungs. God isn’t in the business of breaking promises. That’s what it said. 

He doesn’t tell you go get a girl--to be her family no matter the cost, the time, the struggle--and just leave you hanging. God isn’t in the business of breaking promises. So breathe out your worry and anxiety and mistrust, and let that sink in. 

Last week I was in an elementary gym trying to convince kids that Jesus is dependable. “He is not here; he has risen, just as he said.” I felt desperate. After only a few weeks of seeing us one hour a week these kids trusted us with information like “we don’t have enough food” “my dad’s in jail” “my parents are fighting.” I felt desperate for them to know that God was dependable. And then I realized I’m desperate to know that too. 

Sunday was all about God’s plan being bigger than ours. When it seems like are dreams are dead, God’s love changes everything. His plan is always bigger than ours. He is faithful. He is risen, just as he said. 

Monday we gathered friends in our home who are committed to helping us bring our girl home. These are the people she is going to experience community with, that are going to show her what the Church looks like alongside us. I talked to a dear friend on the phone and she reminded me that “Blessed is she who has believed that the LORD would fulfill his promises to her.” (Luke 1:45) He keeps his promises. We need our community. It was good, just as he said. 

Today. Today we received our official referral. God does not tell you to go get a girl, to be her family no matter what, and just leave you hanging. Every obstacle that seemed immovable, every fee that seemed impossible to pay has proven that God keeps his promises.  He is dependable. He is faithful. It is happening, just as he said. 

Tomorrow. There is a lot to do before we get her--more paperwork, more fees, and travel expenses. But for now... 

If you are my friend on Facebook, you know I have big feels about the ridiculous nature of holiday parties for infants and toddlers. Is it really necessary to pump our kids full of sugar every six weeks starting in infancy?? Does anyone really keep all of the stuff they just collected from the 10 other 10 month olds at the class holiday party? No. If you were wondering...the answer is no.

HOWEVER, and this is a big however for me, I will admit that now that we are solidly in the the upper end of toddler hood Clementine does actually know what a party is and enjoys a good celebration. She is starting to form actual relationships with her little friends, and making our friends feel special and loved is important! So that brings me to the TWO Valentine's parties my little love has this week.

I knew I wanted to send something that a) doesn't involve candy, and b) is fun for both boys and girls. I found this adorable idea on Pinterest and knew it was perfect! If you click through the link there are 4 free downloads, but I chose to make my own so I could include her name.

Oh, the places she'll go! Oh the things that she'll do! Thanks for celebrating with us. Clementine is two!

Our Clementine turned two this past Saturday. We had the best day celebrating with sweet friends and family who love her so well. We kept things simple, with her favorite things loosely themed around "Oh the Places You'll Go": favorite people, "tupcates", and balloons. 

I'm amazed at the fiercely independent, sweetly compassionate, funny little soul God gave us two years ago. Every day we get to glimpse a little more of who she will become, and just find so much joy in who she is already. Clementine loves to build things like her Daddy, loves to "help", loves to bake (both pretend and real), would love for you to read to her all day, loves the outdoors, can pretend for days, and has an adventurous spirit without being overly reckless. She loves pretty things and has a solid opinion on fashion already, but also likes to play airplanes and get messy. I am 110% biased, but that doesn't change the fact that she is awesome. 

I posted this photo instagram and facebook this weekend with this caption:

We've been in a holding pattern for the adoption for what seems like forever. This week we got great news that we can move forward with the next step--and should quickly!! We had a crazy busy week getting things together in the midst of busy work weeks. Last piece together morning before I take a quick trip to Austin to get it all approved! #yousaidgo #bringherhome

First, thank you for celebrating with us. Good news---ANY good news---is so encouraging right now. Knowing that all of you were celebrating with us just made even sweeter.

Second, what does this mean exactly?!? I have had many questions (thanks for asking!) about what, exactly, this all means, and about some details moving forward. Here are some answers to our most frequently asked questions:

So do you get to go get her now? No. We had been collecting documents for our dossier while waiting for a number of specific things to happen in South Africa. We received some good news that a) some of these things were being taken care of in South Africa and b) they wanted us to go ahead and submit our Dossier immediately in order to get it to South Africa before the courts close for the holidays. We spent the week scrambling to gather the last few remaining documents we needed, I went to Austin yesterday to get them apostilled, and we overnight-ed them our agency. I missed something in the details, but we are going to get it worked out by Friday, when they will be mailed to South Africa. 

So, how long until you get to go get her? Once our dossier is submitted to Central Authority in South Africa, the official timeline until we receive our referral is 4-6 weeks. Then, it will likely be 4-6 more weeks after than until we are able to travel to South Africa. I always preface those statements with "if all goes well". TIA--This Is Africa--is a real thing not just a saying, and we would love for your prayers that "all goes well."

How long will you be in South Africa? Who is keeping Clementine? Officially, trip to south Africa will be 5-6 week ("if all goes well"), and we are taking Clementine with us. South Africa is such an important part of our family and we want her to experience the country and start bonding with her sister as soon as possible. Also, 6 weeks away from my baby in an already stressful transition sounds like a bad idea to me. 

How do you think Clementine will react to having a little sister/big sister? To clarify, Clementine is getting a BIG sister. We pray for Big Sister every night, have pictures of her all over our house and talk about her a lot. Clemie calls her "Sasa" and seems to really love looking at pictures of her. We are under no delusions though that our toddler isn't going to have an adjustment period. Grace for all of us. More Grace. 

Have you saved up for your trip?**Insert all other money questions** God is so faithful you guys. We have been able to pay for each fee with cash when we need to so far. We are making sacrifices and working hard, but a lot of that has been your generosity and faithfulness to partner with us. It is the most humbling thing. When we get our referral (possibly in 4-6 weeks) our last Country Fee is due and is the largest. Then, comes travel for the 4 of us for 6 weeks shortly after. We are applying for adoption grants and loans, and trusting that God will continue to be faithful. If you would like to support us financially there are several ways you can do so:

Buy an awesome t-shirt! There are youth sizes, women's slim fit, long-sleeved, AND international shipping available. We need to sell 37 more in the next 4 days or our order doesn't "make": https://www.bonfirefunds.com/yebo 

You can give a tax-deductible donation to Pure Charity here: https://www.purecharity.com/michael-reynoldss-adoption

Six years ago tonight I attended an election watch party**slash** birthday party for my new bestie in my new town. To be fair, he had already made it pretty clear ("I already have enough friends" were his exact words) that he didn't want to be just friends, but I was pretty confident in my abilities to keep things platonic. At one point in the night, he walked past me and gave me a little pat. "Ohhhh no buddy" I thought. Back that train up. Friends. FRIENDS.

Two days later we were on our first date. 

In honor of Trey's birthday today, here are the 6 things I want you to know about him!

Trey Reynolds is a pursuer. He has big ideas, big dreams, big goals. But what separates him from most people I know is that he goes after them. 

Trey Reynolds does hard things. He does them because he sees the bigger picture, the end game. He does them because they make him more like Jesus. 

Trey Reynolds is brilliant. He encompasses every meaning and nuance of that word. He is incredibly gifted, intuitive, and creative. He problem solves. He could rest on his ridiculous IQ, but he is always learning, always growing, always studying. 

Trey Reynolds has the best taste in music. Yep, that's it. It's true. 

Trey Reynolds loves Jesus better than I do. Does the prodigal son story ever make you mad? Yeah, me too sometimes. Because i'm horrible and wretched, and SO the older brother in the story. But not Trey. He deep deep down, soul level, GETS that God's love is for everyone because none of us are worthy. He radically loves Jesus, and he radically loves those who Jesus loves. 

Trey Reynolds is my favorite. Of all time. Of all the evers. He is so much my favorite, that even when I'm mad at him I wish I could go get coffee with him to tell him all about it. He's also Clementine and Maggie's favorite. 

Happy Birthday Trey! Love this adventure with you. 

Motherhood is weird.

Yes, it is weird in the best sort of way. But, it is also just weird in a weird sort of way. Like, when you flash back to this regular occurrence during your pre-teen years circa mid-nineties--triggered, by all things, an interaction with your 20-month old:

Mom: Don't give me that look.

Me: I'M NOT GIVING YOU ANY LOOK!!!! **CRYING** **GNASHING OF TEETH**

#sorrymom

Motherhood is hard. 

Clementine was about 3 weeks old and I made it to church for the first time. I was standing at the back of our contemporary worship service doing the newborn bouncy-rock thing you do, when our Sr. Pastor's wife walked by. First, she oohed and awed over my sweet girl. But then she looked me in the eye and with so much compassion and understanding, said, "It is just so hard, isn't it? It is the hardest thing you will ever do." I could have kissed her, cried, and praised Jesus all in that moment. (And I may have...those days are a blur.) So much truth there. And Grace. 

But we make is so much harder than it already is, don't we? My inbox, blog list, and newsfeed is all full of anxiety-ridden article after guilt-laden list on the newest, best, most organic, and yes, even biblical way do this motherhood thing. (SPOILER ALERT: they all contradict each other.) 

There are Dear SAHM (Stay at Home Mom) letters and Dear Working Mom letters, and neither serve much purpose beyond self-congratulation or self-condemnation depending on how your day is going. We are all busy, we are all tired, and no one is gaining a deeper appreciation for the "other" from any of this.

If we are honest, all of the angst-y judgment about how everyone else is doing all the things is really only about us. I know this because I was simultaneously annoyed by the PDO Halloween party signups again this year (but hey! at least they are walking and eating solids), and wrote an extra "Other" line on the form because I was late and all the spots were filled. 

I'm not sure what is harder, having a little grace for you when you do things **GASP** not the way I would do them, or having a little for myself when the.exact.same.thing happens. But I'm too tired not to try something. This other mess is exhausting. So, what do you say Mommas? Let's do something crazy and stop making this harder on each other than it already is. 

Clementine has a new favorite game.

Momma: Clementine, can Momma have kisses?

Clementine: No!

Momma: Pleeeaaase. <pretend crying. pretend crying> I neeeed kisses!

Clementine: Noooooo!! (while imitating my pretend pouty face)

Eventually, she gives in and says "Momma! (pretend pouty face) Momma! (pretend pouty face)" and throws her arms wide to give me a hug and kiss. I know when she wants to play because she will randomly start yelling "No!" my direction with her pretend pouty face. I'm a fan of this game because a) she looks so funny while doing it and b) I always get sweet sweet kisses out of it. Worst case scenario, Baby or Dollie are the ones to comfort me instead of C. 

We've been getting a lot of no's lately. Nothing definitive, but definitive delays. My prayer of late hasn't strayed far from a whiney, pouty, crying "please." I'm waiting for the hug, the open arms, but it seems the world is even more stubborn and strong willed than my toddler. A lot less cute, too. 

I haven't written much about the details of the adoption process here. Previously our game plan was to hold off on submitting our home study until some specific things happen, and many (so.many.) of our no's have come from this point in the process. We are now moving forward on our end with next steps. We had to ask ourselves, "Is this adoption what God has called you to?" God has given us so many yeses to this question, we felt like we need to move forward in faith trusting that the risk will be worth it.

These are the next steps:

File immigration paperwork- 8 week process, during which we will gather the documents we are missing for our Dossier.

Submit Dossier to South Africa Central Authority.

Receive our referral and submit stage 2 of immigration paperwork- Official timeline is 2-4 weeks.

Travel (!!)-- 4-6 weeks after referral acceptance.

(I AM HIS)

Dear Daughters,

Being your Mama stretches me everyday. It is a Joy. It is a Trip. It is hysterical, gut wrenching, surprising, and incredibly predictable all at once. It is at times the worst, most often the best, and I'm not ever sure how I can live up to the task of raising you. Being your Mama is a gift--You are a gift to me. 

Tomorrow Big Sister will be in Africa and Little Sister will be with her GoGo and Pop safe from Mama's flu and pneumonia germs, so I'm writing you this letter. This is what I want for Mother's Day--take notes, sweet ones.

I want you to know you are delighted in. 

Most days, you will know this because my face will light up when I see you. I will slow down and let you walk allllll the way from the parking lot into Target, "help" push the cart, and walk alllllll the way back to the car. (I'm looking at you Clementine) I will listen to your stories, create art with you, and notice when you need extra hugs. 

But, I'm not always going to get this right. As big as my love is for you, it isn't perfect--most obviously when vomit is involved. More than my great delight in all things Big and Little Sister, God is overjoyed by your little selves! 

The Lord your God is with you.     He is mighty enough to save you. He will take great delight in you.     The quietness of his love will calm you down.     He will sing with joy because of you. 

                               Zephaniah 3:17

I want you to be problem solvers and creators.

The world need problem solvers, girls. The Church desperately needs problem solvers. Do you see an injustice? An inefficiency? A missed opportunity? Don't wait for someone else to address it. Include others, foster community, and think outside of the box. Most grown-ups have either forgotten how to create new solutions or never learned how. When I ask you "How can you help?" and it frustrates you, know I do it because I believe the world needs you to be able to answer that question on all levels. 

Create solutions. Create new things. Build up. Resurrect things around you. 

I want you to do hard things. 

Your Daddy always says "We do hard things, because they make us more like Jesus." When you face a decision head on, and you know that one path is easiest, less risky...chose the other one. Saying "Yes" to God is rarely "easy", but it is worth it. Will I be scared that you want to live in India and love on street kids with no salary? Maybe, but I will learn to trust Jesus more as I celebrate that you said yes. The more you say Yes, the more you hear Jesus invite you. 

I want you to know, that as awesome as you are, "it" isn't actually about you. 

You are delighted in. Jesus is with you. We are for you. But please know dear ones, "it" isn't all about you. This fact does not lessen how much you are loved, how truly beautiful you are, or the unique gifts Jesus has placed in you for His world. I want you to know that life is about SO much more than your happiness. Pursue Joy and not happiness. Pursue community and not popularity. Pursue meaning and not success. Pursue questions and not answers.

     Last Sunday, we realized that it had been exactly a year since we told my parents about the adoption. There are valid reasons that our journey has gone slower than I would like up until this point, and we trust God's timing--but what a punch to the gut! A WHOLE YEAR. Luckily, we've also seen some encouraging progress these past few weeks, and are hopeful that things on the South Africa side will get rolling a bit quicker. We feel a sense of urgency to get Our Girl home, and are looking at some hefty agency fees coming up. 

Enter Lola Blue! I met Jessica and her sweet family at a previous church job. She makes these AWESOME, super creative bags that were recently given away as swag at the MTV Movie Awards. How cool is that? Jessica and her family have a huge heart for missions and I'm so honored she is allowing us to feature her Piper Bag in our fundraiser. 

This bag is awesome, and there are several adorable fabric combinations to chose from on Lola Blue's website. There are six, count them SIX inside pockets, that makes this an amazing carry-on, everyday bag for your laptop, diaper bag, or overnight bag. 

One of our lucky readers will get a Piper Bag, in the fabric combination of your choice!

Here are the details:

You have until May 18th to enter, and our winner will be chosen and announced on May 19th---just in time to get your bag for Memorial Day Weekend!

To enter: make a donation to our Paypal, and include your contact information.**

We suggest a donation of $10 per entry, but it is up to you! There is no limit to entries. 

Once your payment has posted, we will send you a picture of your entry ticket.

We will use www.random.org to chose our lucky friend!

I will contact the winner and then order your choice of Piper Bag!

Please share this on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and email all of your friends!

We need $3850 for our next fee, and that's where 100% of your entries will go. THANK YOU for helping us get our girl home! 

As always, if you'd like to make a tax-deductible donation toward our adoption fees instead of entering to win the bag you may do so here. 

We are up to our elbows in laundry and baths (sick baby) over here. I'm working on an exciting and fun opportunity though, and you should definitely check back tomorrow morning! 

We had a wonderful weekend of Easter celebration: lots of good cousin time, Grandee and Grandad were here, and a wonderful morning of worship at church!